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Post by hail on Aug 8, 2014 22:58:58 GMT -5
This story is amazing, you are both quite the writers.
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Post by hail on Aug 8, 2014 23:11:39 GMT -5
If you poke around on the boards you will see a range of relationships that started here. Some did not last long, some are still going. I know of one couple that got married after meeting here. I noticed this thread a few hours after you posted and a line you wrote in another thread got me thinking. In theory a dev and pwd relationship seems like a match made in heaven. Finding this board is pretty exciting coming from the view of a disabled male. I came to this board four years ago and boy the first few months I thought I was the Brad Pitt of the disabled yes. I got a lot of attention and was very happy/excited about it. I went as far to ask why I never looked in to devs in the first place. But then I realized that there is noting different about trying to date these ladies here compared to say okcupid or match. With this group of ladies there is not really a need to break them in to my disability like I normal would if I met someone that is not a dev. What is still the same is finding a person who inspires you, someone that you can get along with, someone that would put up with my crap. I personally think it is hard trying to start a relationship here on the boards because of the distance involved. Can you find a relationship here? Yes you sure can. But don't expect it to happen right away or that these ladies will be dropping from the sky. Having someone be physically in to you is AWESOME but if you can't back it up with something more things will die off rather quickly. Over the four years that I have been here I have met a few of the ladies in person, but I did not go on a date with one until I was here about 3 years. It was a pretty cool experience and it make me realize that I possibly been with a dev years ago and just had no clue. But just like dating outside this place things do not work out. The next girl I dated here almost never happened. I was one of those guys that saw her profile and went OMG she is beautiful! And yes I sent you a PM just like every other guy that was on the boards at the time. I then thought that she was just one hot little number looking for attention from the guys here (that does happen sometimes) and she thought I was some creeper. Total bad start. But over the first month she was around we ran in to each other in the chat room and talked a little bit. One night she was talking about getting a camera for your sister for Christmas. Being a photographer that peaked my interest and I sent her a few links to some sales and gave ideas what to look for. The whole time keeping things platonic. A couple days before I was suppose to get my transplant she just sent me a little message wishing me luck which I thought was sweet. Fast forward to Christmas Eve I sent her a message saying basically if we don't get to cross paths I hope that she has a great christmas. From there we exchanged Skype names and started chatting on a regular basis. I can not stress this point enough. It was/is the personality that Ruby has that draws me to her. Right before my next scheduled transplant I went out to a friends birthday party in California and we decided to meet in person. Meeting her in real life was a game changer for me. I knew I was in trouble, her online personality can not hold a candle to her real life personality. We have had our ups and downs, we have had stress come in to our lives but we laugh at what ever the problem is and move forward. (oh which reminds me, in the chat room the a couple of days ago the rumors of my dismise are totally not true. I was sleeping next to her on the couch with a fever.) I personally don't feel this relationship is as solid as it is because I am disabled and she is dev. It was just the part that made the initial interaction easier on my end. (again not having the need to ease someone in to my disability) On the physical side a pwd/dev thing is pretty awesome. Anyway that is my 2 cents. Take your time Luke and just keep a open mind. I hate that society views being attracted to people with disabilities as such a negative thing. In the same way that it's shocking people with disabilities are sexual being. These attitudes can be tricky for people with disabilities to wade through. Once PWD's hear about devotees many think they've hit the jackpot. Just because there are devotees on here doesn't meant they are going to be lining up down the street to go for a ride haha in my dreams! PWD devotee relationships are no different than any other relationship in my opinion, they still require all the hard work of both parties to make it work. It excites me to know their are women out there who I don't need to explain every little thing about my disability to. Attraction is merely the tipping point. I'm glad to be a new member of this community and to see how "normal" it really is. I'm going to keep working for what I believe in and I'm confident the right lady is going to come along for me sometime or another. Great to hear couples have met on here but it's important to remember that isn't the be all or end all of being on here.
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Post by lars on Aug 9, 2014 7:54:45 GMT -5
A damn fine text, Mr. BB. There's a lot to be learned from that, things that can make it better for all of us, devs and PWDS alike.
I think I read one of your texts soon after I joined here, and I'm glad that I did. The excitement of finding this board can be a pretty intense experience indeed.
L
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tina
Junior Member
Posts: 94
Relationship Status: In a relationship
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Post by tina on Aug 16, 2014 12:38:10 GMT -5
To the original question: no. I am from Germany and I know that long distance (at least the really long distance across countries and continents) would never work for me. Unfortunately, that seriously limits my options here..
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Post by hail on Aug 16, 2014 22:49:31 GMT -5
To the original question: no. I am from Germany and I know that long distance (at least the really long distance across countries and continents) would never work for me. Unfortunately, that seriously limits my options here.. Distance is rough but I'm sure the right person will come along.
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Post by Ath on Aug 16, 2014 23:03:05 GMT -5
To the original question: no. I am from Germany and I know that long distance (at least the really long distance across countries and continents) would never work for me. Unfortunately, that seriously limits my options here.. There are several german members here im sure someone can hook you up
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Tinchen
Junior Member
Posts: 65
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Married/Domestic partnership
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Post by Tinchen on Sept 13, 2014 19:20:05 GMT -5
I met my husband here on PD. I’ve been telling him he should be writing this down instead since he’s a much better writer than I am, but he’s too busy it seems so you will have to make do with my writing I got in contact with him the very same day I signed up to PD. He was in fact one of the first guys to PM me and he managed to spark an interest in me from the very first message. It was simple, yet full of wit and brains but without being flirty or cheesy. He was only a few years older than myself and living in a country not too far away from my own. Perfect . We started writing back and forth, and soon we were speaking daily on here as well as on yahoo using webcam and microphone. By the time we finally met in person for the first time (a few months later) we both felt as if we had known each other for a much longer time than we actually had. Almost right away I felt comfortable in his company, and that’s even though I’m a very shy person normally. Shortly after, we started to consider ourselves a couple and managed to see each other at least once a month even if it was usually shorter visits. The longest we went without seeing each other was six weeks and it was tough, really tough. I really don't know how other couples do it when they sometimes go even longer without seeing each other! Our distance relationship lasted a year. In February 2013 I packed up, left Sweden and moved to Germany to live with him. Best decision I’ve ever made! Within only a few months we were engaged and roughly a year later (July 2014) we got married. Now we’re expecting our first baby, due in only a few days . We surely have PD to thank for a lot!! lol
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Post by happyface2013 on Sept 14, 2014 8:59:00 GMT -5
Lovely story Tinchen.
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Post by ruthmadison on Sept 14, 2014 9:44:38 GMT -5
I know of at least two relationships that started on the board and are still going.
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mario
New Member
Posts: 48
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: It's complicated
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Post by mario on Sept 24, 2014 2:48:31 GMT -5
If you spend some time on this forum you will see members from all over the world. IMO, distance relationships doesn't work but here also some stories which are proving that I'm wrong.
I didn't put too much time in this forum yet, but as you can see the quality of discussions is great. The guys are nice and the girls very well educated and really smart.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 27, 2014 13:53:33 GMT -5
Personally, Long distance relationships would be tough without having some in-person contact as well. Fortunately we have airplanes nowadays. ..and a long distance cyber/Skype relationship can evolve overnight into a bonafide love affair. PD is great for the Introduction though.
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