bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26 
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 18:58:44 GMT -5
So I am new not only to this site but also new to this personal exploration within such a specified, so to speak, mutually common desire or need by those of us historically referred to as damaged, be it by birth or circumstance, and those expressing, experimenting, experiencing an uncommon attraction. I've only skimmed very few postings and the threads that result. I am pleased to see and sense the comfort displayed in the community. My first attempt to contact members was a reply to a seemingly outdated thread - and in my reply I expressed my recognition, although with very little exposure, of the majority of male members as chair riders which encouraged me to respectfully inquire of this crew - I am a left upper unilateral amputee living in Philadelphia; my misguided post inquired of y'all as to whether my particular, dare I say, affliction might be better suited elsewhere. I said misguided but I must now say that to be untrue because InkDevil spotted my wandering words, my wondering worry and nudged me quite properly to the creation of this thread. I seek to share what may be shared. Hello to all. Or, rather, since I am from Philly: "YO!"
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Post by Inigo Montoya on May 27, 2015 20:06:04 GMT -5
So, you were trapped in the tinysighs thread? lol
Welcome.
You don't have to use a wheelchair to be here. We've got a variety and more variety is always welcome.
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 20:35:15 GMT -5
So, you were trapped in the tinysighs thread? lol Welcome. You don't have to use a wheelchair to be here. We've got a variety and more variety is always welcome. Yeah, my inexperience with public forum communication; particularly, one that touches upon a latent interest(Devotees) and lax practice(deliberate communication with others experiencing life in a bodily altered state) led me quickly to an obviously appealing thread. Thanks for your welcoming response. |
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Post by Dreamer5678 on May 27, 2015 20:43:13 GMT -5
Welcome bluemonkey.
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 21:05:46 GMT -5
Hey, thanks, Dreammeister. Nice to be here. Getting nicer. |
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 21:07:32 GMT -5
Thanks much. Looking forward to falling in to this forum. |
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Post by blueskye101 on May 27, 2015 21:32:00 GMT -5
Welcome
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Post by AlrightyAphrodite on May 27, 2015 21:37:40 GMT -5
Big words are sexy. Welcome!
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 21:57:59 GMT -5
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 22:12:38 GMT -5
Big words are sexy. Welcome! Gee whiz, I'm a bit flustered, mz. Aphrodite.I sure do hope I can muster further elucidation if for nothin else than only to elicit your sweet appreciation. |
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 27, 2015 22:13:40 GMT -5
Welcome blue monkey.  glad @inkdevil was able to guide you to your own thread. Thank you. Thank you. Me too. Me too. |
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Post by AlrightyAphrodite on May 27, 2015 22:47:57 GMT -5
Big words are sexy. Welcome! Gee whiz, I'm a bit flustered, mz. Aphrodite.I sure do hope I can muster further elucidation if for nothin else than only to elicit your sweet appreciation. Well you could begin by telling us a bit more about yourself. |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2015 0:06:24 GMT -5
Hi..nice to have you here |
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bluemonkey
New Member
Posts: 26
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by bluemonkey on May 28, 2015 0:32:53 GMT -5
Gee whiz, I'm a bit flustered, mz. Aphrodite.I sure do hope I can muster further elucidation if for nothin else than only to elicit your sweet appreciation. Well you could begin by telling us a bit more about yourself. okay. Rapid-fire style, then. I am 46. Father of two girls with two mothers. Five days after I turned 20 I was involved in an accident that by all physical laws of nature should have killed me. Aside head trauma and internal injury my left arm was all but torn from the socket. Nerve damage paralyzed the limb except for shoulder rotation. I maintained my arm for 17 years, adapting in a manner that 'fooled' quite a few people, including a woman I slept with twice before she realized I could not move the arm-all the while presuming some technology may come along any minute to mend me. During the winter of 2005 I was moving (since my return to philly in July of 1992 i have lived in 23 locations - gypsy blood? Restless spirit, no doubt) and while carrying boxes I experienced symptoms of sciatica. Two days later I could not bear weight on my right ankle. Fearfully, I sought assessment - a disk was herniated. During therapy a woman I was working with asked me to stand against a wall - "stand straight", she said. " I am straight", I said. "Ohh, no your not!", she said. She came to me, placed a hand on my left shoulder, a hand on my right hip, shifted me and said, " NOW you're straight!" That was the moment the next step of my experience with my injury began. Due to my adaptive methods and the weight of the paralyzed limb a self imposed scoliosis developed - so my choice then became either to triple the exercises I was doing to offset the imbalance OR . . . make the conscious decision to remove my limb to ensure no further risk to my spine. That decision took two years to resolve. Fortunately, divine fortune indeed, the girl I was living with at that time was (and still is) the only reason I was able to handle that process as 'well' as I did. The pain. The alteration in body image. The women. The alcohol. The drugs. The narcotic prescriptions. So many and much of all of them. Drawn always to those damaged. The past 18 months have whirlwinded me with two back to back 5 month 'relationships' - 1st was 14 years younger, drew love from me for the first time in six years and never have I been so poorly treated than by that girl. Following her was a woman my age who gave me all I was missing from prior but her alcoholism and mental health were too much anxiety. After her a series of drugged and drunken antics culminating with me watching my 27 year old friend crash her bicycle in front of me as we rode drunkenly on labor day here in philly-she fractured her C1 vertebrae and was a pubic hair width from never leaving that sidewalk. So, I stopped drinking. Transcended a long term friendship into a sexual game with another lady and regained contact with an ex girlfriend from 2003 and convinced myself for a few months it was all okay but very recently stopped all that because all I was doing was absent any true emotional satisfaction, not soul food, not spiritual elixir. I have been employed by the city of Philadelphia in the criminal court system for 23 years. Took a leave of absence this past fall into early winter to change behavioral patterns of self destructive nature, no booze since september-i don't miss alcohol. I do miss marijuana, though. But I promised myself no nothing until December. Gaining, dare I say, perspective from a sober standpoint has, among other things, allowed me to realize the extent of the effects of behaviors motivated by a prominent self loathing that undoubtedly has been entrenched by the amputation and the residual experiences from said. Due solely my genetics I am in remarkable condition considering what I've put my body through. Scarred torso. Scarred skull. Seared soul. Removing myself all but completely from the social scenes I've known for twenty plus years, treating myself nicer, attempting to dig writing and artwork that has not been destroyed by me from boxes to return to my role as creator. Learning to love myself, truly - firmly embracing all my true beauty, never having accepted the 'conventional' attractiveness I apparently possess as I've never quite resolved the seemingly dichotomous image of me, despite assurances I am 'edgy sexy'. To wind up this tirade I am transitioning from what it is I have been to who it is I truly am. So, that's as thoroughly brief an introduction as I can offer. |
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Post by alexa2010 on May 28, 2015 0:44:02 GMT -5
I keep it short.
Welcome.
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glad @inkdevil was able to guide you to your own thread.