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Post by lars on Jan 21, 2016 15:12:43 GMT -5
So.. If I ask someone "I wonder if playing badminton could be fun?", all the while secretly hoping said person would get curious enough to try it out, it makes me a manipulative sociopath and I'm one step away from having my own basement dungeon and a barrel full of chloroform? 'Cause frankly put, there's not much of a difference to what hail suggested.
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Post by lucretia on Jan 21, 2016 15:16:25 GMT -5
So.. If I ask someone "I wonder if playing badminton could be fun?", all the while secretly hoping said person would get curious enough to try it out, it makes me a manipulative sociopath and I'm one step away from having my own basement dungeon? 'Cause frankly put, there's not much of a difference to what hail suggested. Badminton Basement Dungeon does have a nice ring to it, though... Kidding!!!! Yeah, going from seed planter to dungeon troll seems a bit of a stretch.
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Post by lucretia on Jan 21, 2016 15:17:08 GMT -5
I have a super weird question...did some content of this discussion get deleted? I haven't noticed anything missing... But it is a little disjointed...
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Post by lucretia on Jan 21, 2016 15:21:25 GMT -5
So.. If I ask someone "I wonder if playing badminton could be fun?", all the while secretly hoping said person would get curious enough to try it out, it makes me a manipulative sociopath and I'm one step away from having my own basement dungeon and a barrel full of chloroform? 'Cause frankly put, there's not much of a difference to what hail  suggested. TWO steps... Two. Buahahahahahahaha
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Post by lars on Jan 21, 2016 15:31:43 GMT -5
I don't know about you, but I get my chloroform from the same place I get my badminton rackets.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 21, 2016 15:42:30 GMT -5
So.. it makes me a manipulative sociopath and I'm one step away from having my own basement dungeon and a barrel full of chloroform? Well, fear is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 21, 2016 17:28:25 GMT -5
I am just trying to figure out if I am going crazy or if my post was inappropriate and just got wiped out with another one..... I have a super weird question...did some content of this discussion get deleted? I haven't noticed anything missing... But it is a little disjointed...
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Post by hartmannwrites on Jan 21, 2016 19:42:02 GMT -5
Well, fear is the ultimate aphrodisiac. I'm buying a tarantula for the bedroom Aww. How cute
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Post by hail on Jan 21, 2016 20:32:45 GMT -5
Well that spiralled out of control quickly. Any devs wanna come play in my dungeon?
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Post by Corey on Jan 21, 2016 20:39:17 GMT -5
They do hail, but only if its underneath a forest of psychopath trees.
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Post by Celaena on Jan 21, 2016 21:22:26 GMT -5
I agree with Clair's idea of the dev-spectrum- where everyone on it is a dev, some keep it in fantasy, some don't, but one side is purely sexual and the other side is intellectual. Yes- I agree with Clair deLune on the dev spectrum idea. Since I am married to an AB guy, I definitely think that my devvy side is more intellectual based than sexual. I do love to read naughty romance novels with PWD, but it has always been the more character based/intellectual for me. I don't know that I would consider my dev-ness (I've been calling it dev-ity in my head so if I mistype it sometime, that is why!) a fetish, per se, but I also don't consider it to be something so ingrained in me like my sexuality (mostly heterosexual, according to this super accurate Buzzfeed Kinsey scale quiz). It is definitely a part of my personality and is something I am not shy about sharing, so I guess I'm somewhere in the middle. Perhaps we need to come up with some sort of quiz to determine where on the dev scale we all fall!
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Post by rebel6842 on Jan 21, 2016 21:58:16 GMT -5
I won't judge a person who isn't turned on by PWDs, it's their choice, just like some people aren't turned on by dating someone of a certain race, hair color, body type, whatever it might be. We can't force ourselves to be turned on by something that doesn't turn us on. Truth be told, I'm not terribly turned on by lady PWDs. I won't exclude dating one, but, I don't seek one either. While we can't FORCE AB's to be turned on by us, the difference, IMO, is how AB's react to the fact that we can be sexual beings...
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Post by Mets on Jan 21, 2016 23:37:18 GMT -5
My experience with alleged "non-devs" is that having sex/relationships with a disabled person has never crossed their minds. Especially if they've never before encounter disability besides meeting me. I feel like the curiosity isn't just there waiting to be activated but I feel like the idea can be planted and hopefully it'll grow. One of my attendants always suggested I plant that seed early with new people. Like saying hey I just signed up for online dating, any tips? Just anything to introduce the idea that I'm sexually active and interested. Just a different take on things. One can educate others about disability and to be open minded but cannot plant the idea of dating or having sex with PWD! This is an absolutely sneaky idea. Calling it sneaky actually cannot justify my feeling. What is the next 2 steps further down? You gonna kidnap a young girl, lock her in your dungeon and wait for her to be your wife or worse?!! Why I cannot stop feeling that I am looking at a seed of the psychopath tree?!
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Post by strawberrybubblegum on Jan 21, 2016 23:53:05 GMT -5
One can educate others about disability and to be open minded but cannot plant the idea of dating or having sex with PWD! This is an absolutely sneaky idea. Calling it sneaky actually cannot justify my feeling. What is the next 2 steps further down? You gonna kidnap a young girl, lock her in your dungeon and wait for her to be your wife or worse?!! Why I cannot stop feeling that I am looking at a seed of the psychopath tree?! I just needed way too long to get this... -.-
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Post by Deleted on Jan 22, 2016 19:45:37 GMT -5
How is it any different than any other guy flashing their peacock feathers in women's faces?? AB men give women innuendo ALL THE TIME. Why do AB men get to corner the market on this? So a Hail can't necessarily flex his biceps in the direction of a women hoping to lure her in... So he has to use words to get his innuendo across, doesn't make it creepy or pathetic. Letting someone know that you're also a sexual being and you want to be noticed isn't doing anymore than what any other beefcake is doing at a pub on a Saturday night. In the end, it's still a "hey, look at me!" maneuverer. IMO.
I actually think it's a decent idea, hail, because if nothing else, it opens conversation.
Regardless you are AB or PWD, you can always try to open a conversation with 'new people' like... Hey, I am trying online dating and do you have any trips to offer? Let the counter party decide you are creepy or not. Obviously not something you want to lead with.. BUT if A person thinks you're creepy.. fuck 'em... If every girl you talk to seems to abruptly end the conversation and seems uneasy.. THEN you might want to rethink your strategy. At the end of the day... rejection shouldn't be on the forefront of your mind. Interacting with interesting and new people should. You adopt that attitude or culture.. and you're guaranteed to find someone that interests you... and in showing interest and sharing of yourself.. you are bound to get a bite or two. **two cents on the counter... ... .... cue squeaky wheeled roll away** The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. -Mark Twain
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