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Post by someonerandom on Aug 16, 2018 22:01:56 GMT -5
When I first got paralyzed I had a choice between Apparalyzed and Carecure for connecting with other cripples. I chose Apparalyzed because it was a much more supportive and positive environment for new gimps, and I found more humor there as well. Whenever I looked at Carecure I felt depressed reading the comments. Then Apparalyzed closed and I chose to connect with SCI people on the dev site rather than Carecure. I think it's more sex positive on a dev site. Admittedly, I haven't visited CC in several years.
There's no rule that you can't talk about cripple shit here. And it's not like sharing your "darkest fantasies" and stuff either, I just don't see what the big deal is with making a disability thread here. I bet some of the devs get off on it or at least find it interesting...
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Post by lucretia on Aug 17, 2018 4:25:24 GMT -5
I don't mind the topic, more that he specifically wasn't here for the dev thing at all... And that's who we are.
When guys who are here to discuss devs and dev interests also talk to each other and ask advice.. no issue here.
But guys coming here for disability questions without any interest in devs or dev stuff... That's entirely different.
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Post by hanabanana on Aug 17, 2018 22:40:05 GMT -5
I haven't spent any time there but isn't there a site called CareCure that specifically a forum for discussing all things SCI? Let me look........ Yup, took 5 sec to find it: sci.rutgers.edu/hanabanana It seems lots of dudes come here asking questions that seem to be more appropriate for that forum. I have never spent time there. Maybe I'm mistaken and questions like these aren't welcome there. As someone else pointed out, CC is definitely not the place one would turn to first to ask sex questions imo. I feel like if anything, this is a great place to ask this question. The dude might not even have a SCI. But regardless, I welcome the blundering wanderers who come here, I feel like we could be a bit more welcoming? I for one am actually interested in answers to this question! Survey? |
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Post by lucretia on Aug 18, 2018 8:31:13 GMT -5
I haven't spent any time there but isn't there a site called CareCure that specifically a forum for discussing all things SCI? Let me look........ Yup, took 5 sec to find it: sci.rutgers.edu/hanabanana It seems lots of dudes come here asking questions that seem to be more appropriate for that forum. I have never spent time there. Maybe I'm mistaken and questions like these aren't welcome there. As someone else pointed out, CC is definitely not the place one would turn to first to ask sex questions imo. I feel like if anything, this is a great place to ask this question. The dude might not even have a SCI. But regardless, I welcome the blundering wanderers who come here, I feel like we could be a bit more welcoming? I for one am actually interested in answers to this question! Survey? I like the term "blundering wanderers". |
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Post by sungod on Aug 18, 2018 13:52:32 GMT -5
As someone else pointed out, CC is definitely not the place one would turn to first to ask sex questions imo. I feel like if anything, this is a great place to ask this question. I have participated in CareCure, and there are plenty of people who turn there to ask sex questions. He might have to join and dig around to find that out, though. As others have noted, although he's looking for answers for a legit inquiry, it's a bit much to spring on a crowd as an introduction. |
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Post by Hopper on Aug 19, 2018 11:46:00 GMT -5
Indeed. Though I do admire his confidence to just spring that up on us, it takes a lot to do that.
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Tom
Junior Member
Posts: 61
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Post by Tom on Aug 21, 2018 16:54:37 GMT -5
I was injured as a child so I grew up facing many of the issues that the OP mentioned. Though I was educated about sex along with my peers nothing was included in my IEP(Individualized Education Plan) to expand on how my disability might effect my sexuality/sexual function. Never once did a doctor bring it up with me until after I was 18. While puberty was hitting me in full force around 12-13 I began getting erections when I would wake up or at random times throughout the day. I also just happened to get a labtop through California Children Services, and convinced my Dad to run a ethernet cable back to my room. With somewhat private access to the internet I started exploring sites like CareCure, Apparalyzed, and anything that had to do with SCI and sexuality. There was a surprising amount of information to sift through with only a fraction related to quads with similar injuries to mine. I started to read about reflex erections, Vibratory Stimulation, ED treatments, Toys/assistive devices, and a few accounts of guys who were met with varied levels of Success. Armed with my newfound knowledge I began to trouble shoot how to go about putting it to practical use. I have two siblings very close in age and shared a room with my brother, factor in my parents and I had zero time alone to explore. Luckily both siblings are athletes and started competing at higher levels which meant often traveling to tournaments on weekends. I was sometimes allowed to stay home if it wasnt an overnight trip. With maybe one or two weekend days with 8-10 hours by myself I started to practice masturbating. I say practice because I was not met with much success at the start. Id put on some porn and feel horny but the first few times it was like I was pawing at a limp noodle. After a few tries I switched things up by adjusting my chair differently so I was in a more comfortable position. My clothes were a huge issue as I could take them off but not put my pants or underwear back on so that would have been a dead giveaway. Masturbating with your pants on is not easy for an AB let alone a quad but I had no choice so on days I knew I would be home alone id ask to be dressed in pajama bottoms or some loose fitting sweatpants/shorts. With more ease of access to the goods and a refined technique I achieved my first ever reflex erection. I found the I could kind of grip my penis by using the resistance of my clothes pushing against the back of my hand. Using this along with my Tenodesis( wrist flextion causing my fingers to close) I could stroke with relative ease and after a few minutes Id start to get hard. I plateaued here for a number of years never attaining an orgasm. I still researched online though I was thinking that I would need to resort to medication or some sort of assistive devices to possibly achieve orgasm. I also started to think maybe I was just unable to achieve orgasm period. I couldn’t order anything to the house and having no one to talk to about trying ED treatment I made it my goal to move out so I would have more freedom to try different things without the watchful eye of my family. The year I turned 18 my brother moved out leaving me a lot more time to myself but my door still had no lock so attempting anything was still risky business. I found myself with a rare evening alone with my parents at a work party and my sister staying at a friends so I made my way to the interwebs and found some inspiring material. Im not sure how well versed you all are in the history of internet pornography, but a few years back all you could find was pictures and short video clips. Jerking off is hard enough with quad paws let alone having to try and click to find a new video every few minutes. On this particular instance I came across a whole movie that was of some interest and started going about my business. Its rather strange describing what it feels like to masturbate. Since I was injured as a kid I never had an orgasm or masturbated while able bodied so I cant relate it to what its like as an AB. I have no sensation below my level of injury so when I stroke myself even though I get hard I know it is my penis in my hand but I can't really feel anything in terms of direct physical sensation. Its even difficult for me to rationalize because why do it if I couldn't feel anything right?! Well I did feel aroused and while I wasnt orgasming I usually found some sort of relief though it was often mixed with frustration and disappointment. Something different started happening this time however, and I started to feel a warm rushing tingly sensation starting in my chest where my sensation started and kept growing in intensity until I felt it all over my body where I had sensation. I knew something was happening so I kept on going. This feeling kept growing in intensity until I felt my erection get harder in my hand and I ejaculated experiencing the first orgasm of my life. I tried to keep going a bit but two things happened that I was not fully expecting(I read some accounts similar to mine before) I experienced the most intense muscle spasms of my whole life throughout my body and got a really intense episode of autonomic dysreflexia. I went from intense excitement, happiness, and elation to a bone chilling fear of being found dead or having a stroke in my wheelchair covered in cum with a lesbian porn film playing on my computer. After about 20 minutes the spots in my vision and intense headache began to abate. Im not sure if I can accurately describe how I felt after that but I had read that AD is a super common result of achieving orgasm for a person with SCI and that there were meds to keep it from happening. So I was mostly just happy that I had done it after I started considering the possibility that maybe I would never be able to orgasm. I then had to deal with the aftermath of my success. I grabbed a washcloth to deal with some of the mess but still had some incriminating evidence showing on the crotch of my basketball shorts and boxer briefs. I had started transferring more and undressing on my own in the evening in hopes of improving my ability to move out sometime in the near term but only had done it once successfully on my own and every time I tried I had someone there to help me if I fell. My plan was to transfer and undress before my parents got home, but I was contemplating the consequences of failure. Despite this and to my parents shock I was in bed when they got home and my clothes successfully tossed into the hamper. From then on I was able to masturbate with varied results and when I was able to achieve orgasm again I did get some AD but much less intensely. Then it stopped happening completely until I bought my first vibrator or had multiple orgasms( stories for a different time  ). I moved out a year and a half later and had a much easier time with such things although caregivers can sometimes be an obstacle. Hope nobody minds the gritty detail, once I started writing I kind of just verbally vomited lol. Honestly though Im glad OP posted the original thread and hope he gets some ideas or makes some progress towards discovering his sexuality in a comfortable sex positive environment. The release and pleasure from masturbating and sex can be really good for you and nobody should feel ashamed or embarrassed to ask questions or desire to achieve that. It makes me so sad that society sucks and can make it super difficult for us crips. I have never posted much on forums period but boards like CareCure and even PD changed my life just by knowing that I was not crazy or wrong to feel the things I do and having a safe environment to read about other experiences, ask questions, and share my own made it possible for me to live and experience all the wonders life offers. I don’t claim to be an expert on any of this but if any body has more questions feel free to ask or PM me. Id be happy to share what I know or have experienced #quadbodsrule (sorry I may have to steal this phrase for daily use lol) |
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Post by Inkdevil on Aug 21, 2018 17:45:42 GMT -5
Don’t take this the wrong way Tom, but you do w@nk on a bit. (I am only joking btw...) |
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Post by bunster on Aug 21, 2018 18:53:25 GMT -5
I was injured as a child so I grew up facing many of the issues that the OP mentioned. Though I was educated about sex along with my peers nothing was included in my IEP(Individualized Education Plan) to expand on how my disability might effect my sexuality/sexual function. Never once did a doctor bring it up with me until after I was 18. While puberty was hitting me in full force around 12-13 I began getting erections when I would wake up or at random times throughout the day. I also just happened to get a labtop through California Children Services, and convinced my Dad to run a ethernet cable back to my room. With somewhat private access to the internet I started exploring sites like CareCure, Apparalyzed, and anything that had to do with SCI and sexuality. There was a surprising amount of information to sift through with only a fraction related to quads with similar injuries to mine. I started to read about reflex erections, Vibratory Stimulation, ED treatments, Toys/assistive devices, and a few accounts of guys who were met with varied levels of Success. Armed with my newfound knowledge I began to trouble shoot how to go about putting it to practical use. I have two siblings very close in age and shared a room with my brother, factor in my parents and I had zero time alone to explore. Luckily both siblings are athletes and started competing at higher levels which meant often traveling to tournaments on weekends. I was sometimes allowed to stay home if it wasnt an overnight trip. With maybe one or two weekend days with 8-10 hours by myself I started to practice masturbating. I say practice because I was not met with much success at the start. Id put on some porn and feel horny but the first few times it was like I was pawing at a limp noodle. After a few tries I switched things up by adjusting my chair differently so I was in a more comfortable position. My clothes were a huge issue as I could take them off but not put my pants or underwear back on so that would have been a dead giveaway. Masturbating with your pants on is not easy for an AB let alone a quad but I had no choice so on days I knew I would be home alone id ask to be dressed in pajama bottoms or some loose fitting sweatpants/shorts. With more ease of access to the goods and a refined technique I achieved my first ever reflex erection. I found the I could kind of grip my penis by using the resistance of my clothes pushing against the back of my hand. Using this along with my Tenodesis( wrist flextion causing my fingers to close) I could stroke with relative ease and after a few minutes Id start to get hard. I plateaued here for a number of years never attaining an orgasm. I still researched online though I was thinking that I would need to resort to medication or some sort of assistive devices to possibly achieve orgasm. I also started to think maybe I was just unable to achieve orgasm period. I could order anything to the house and having no one to talk to about trying ED treatment I made it my goal to move out so I would have more freedom to try different things without the watchful eye of my family. The year I turned 18 my brother moved out leaving me a lot more time to myself but my door still had no lock so attempting anything was still risky business. I found myself with a rare evening alone with my parents at a work party and my sister staying at a friends so I made my way to the interwebs and found some inspiring material. Im not sure how well versed you all are in the history of internet pornography, but a few years back all you could find was pictures and short video clips. Jerking off is hard enough with quad paws let alone having to try and click to find a new video every few minutes. On this particular instance I came across a whole movie that was of some interest and started going about my business. Its rather strange describing what it feels like to masturbate. Since I was injured as a kid I never had an orgasm or masturbated while able bodied so I cant relate it to what its like as an AB. I have no sensation below my level of injury so when I stroke myself even though I get hard I know it is my penis in my hand but I can't really feel anything in terms of direct physical sensation. Its even difficult for me to rationalize because why do it if I couldn't feel anything right?! Well I did feel aroused and while I wasnt orgasming I usually found some sort of relief though it was often mixed with frustration and disappointment. Something different started happening this time however, and I started to feel a warm rushing tingly sensation starting in my chest where my sensation started and kept growing in intensity until I felt it all over my body where I had sensation. I knew something was happening so I kept on going. This feeling kept growing in intensity until I felt my erection get harder in my hand and I ejaculated experiencing the first orgasm of my life. I tried to keep going a bit but two things happened that I was not fully expecting(I read some accounts similar to mine before) I experienced the most intense muscle spasms of my whole life throughout my body and got a really intense episode of autonomic dysreflexia. I went from intense excitement, happiness, and elation to a bone chilling fear of being found dead or having a stroke in my wheelchair covered in cum with a lesbian porn film playing on my computer. After about 20 minutes the spots in my vision and intense headache began to abate. Im not sure if I can accurately describe how I felt after that but I had read that AD is a super common result of achieving orgasm for a person with SCI and that there were meds to keep it from happening. So I was mostly just happy that I had done it after I started considering the possibility that maybe I would never be able to orgasm. I then had to deal with the aftermath of my success. I grabbed a washcloth to deal with some of the mess but still had some incriminating evidence showing on the crotch of my basketball shorts and boxer briefs. I had started transferring more and undressing on my own in the evening in hopes of improving my ability to move out sometime in the near term but only had done it once successfully on my own and every time I tried I had someone there to help me if I fell. My plan was to transfer and undress before my parents got home, but I was contemplating the consequences of failure. Despite this and to my parents shock I was in bed when they got home and my clothes successfully tossed into the hamper. From then on I was able to masturbate with varied results and when I was able to achieve orgasm again I did get some AD but much less intensely. Then it stopped happening completely until I bought my first vibrator or had multiple orgasms( stories for a different time ). I moved out a year and a half later and had a much easier time with such things although caregivers can sometimes be an obstacle. Hope nobody minds the gritty detail, once I started writing I kind of just verbally vomited lol. Honestly though Im glad OP posted the original thread and hope he gets some ideas or makes some progress towards discovering his sexuality in a comfortable sex positive environment. The release and pleasure from masturbating and sex can be really good for you and nobody should feel ashamed or embarrassed to ask questions or desire to achieve that. It makes me so sad that society sucks and can make it super difficult for us crips. I have never posted much on forums period but boards like CareCure and even PD changed my life just by knowing that I was not crazy or wrong to feel the things I do and having a safe environment to read about other experiences, ask questions, and share my own made it possible for me to live and experience all the wonders life offers. I don’t claim to be an expert on any of this but if any body has more questions feel free to ask or PM me. Id be happy to share what I know or have experienced #quadbodsrule (sorry I may have to steal this phrase for daily use lol) |
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Post by bunster on Aug 21, 2018 18:54:09 GMT -5
i LOVE your post and so happy you got an orgasm!!!!! the more detail the better i say  |
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Post by AlrightyAphrodite on Aug 21, 2018 21:48:20 GMT -5
Yup not minding the gritty detail over here at all... that post was hot  |
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Post by someonerandom on Aug 21, 2018 22:06:02 GMT -5
It's so.... Big  |
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Post by Emma on Aug 21, 2018 23:18:02 GMT -5
Thanks for sharing Tom!
It helps to press the enter key every so often though. Walls of text are tough to read. I had a glass of wine before and had to highlight as I read to keep my place.
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Tom
Junior Member
Posts: 61
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Post by Tom on Aug 22, 2018 0:41:35 GMT -5
Thanks for sharing Tom! It helps to press the enter key every so often though. Walls of text are tough to read. I had a glass of wine before and had to highlight as I read to keep my place. Definitely! Sorry about that, I edited it and added some paragraphs. |
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blindlover
Full Member
Posts: 112
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by blindlover on Aug 27, 2018 6:48:45 GMT -5
I mean sure it has its place, but best? I’ll take Hopper’s sarcasm and raise reality. Alone you can think of anyone or anything with no interruptions. Once someone else is there, why are you not having sex? You can touch yourself when someone else isn’t available to do it for you. 🤷🏻♂️ I think this is the perfect example of the old adage, 'Different strokes for different folks'. In addition there are people for which it is hard to to get a hard-on that is sufficient to have sex in it's strict sense, but do enjoy the normal sexual sensations. For them, mutual masturbation might wel be one of the most enjoyable things to feel. |
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). I moved out a year and a half later and had a much easier time with such things although caregivers can sometimes be an obstacle.
