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Post by Deleted on Feb 25, 2019 3:58:13 GMT -5
A micro chips would be amazing!
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Post by kwhi on Mar 2, 2019 12:35:09 GMT -5
I have read in many contexts now on PD that both, PWDs and devs, are sometimes wondering how to recognize whether one would react in an affirmative way or not when approached in the wild. I have never even seen the man of my dreams in real life anywhere (except on tv), but I have certainly imagined what I would do if I came across him. Of course under the aspect of the well known prejudice against devs by many PWDs (which I can totally understand, but nevertheless any kind of prejudice is something that emerges out of a lack of knowledge and understanding). So I had this magnificent idea: what if there was a certain secret code, some sign that indicates a PWD is open to be approached by devs? And vice versa, a dev person being open for PWDs? Less chance to be afraid of getting denied. Like the freemasons (well, a handshake would seem like the second step though), or I don’t know, other members of some other groups that would like to recognize each other without being open about it to the sorrounding? The rainbowflag is not so secret anymore, but there might be a chance that it served this purpose once. I’m not an expert on these things... But I think it would be great to have something like that! What do you think? Any suggestions? Maybe someone else came up with this before, but for now I feel like a genius. ;-) Hi Linda! No code necessary for me. If a cute female approaches,all she needs to do is smile, all that need be said is “hi.” I am happy to take it from there! I think it is hot that a woman finds it sexy that I use a chair! Being a gimp in society can be demeaning in so many ways, when an attractive woman finds me to be her sexual fantasy it is a total turn on. I will take her as far as she wishes to go...she can call me her cripple all night long if that is her “thing!” Seriously for a minute, it all depends on where she wants to take things, does she want a relationship,or a one night stand? Does she want to be understated, or is she into roll play? I simply find being a woman’s sexual turn on a pleasure. So I am devo friendly to say the least.
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Post by linda on Mar 3, 2019 8:36:57 GMT -5
Yea I certainly think tattoos in your face are always a good idea <.< But sarcasm aside when it comes to the world of online dating Lars made a lot of very good points. Make sure we devs can find you. Having a profile which has no indication whatsoever that you have a certain disability makes it nearly impossible for us to make you out. And for devs well I write in my profiles that I'm open to meeting people with disabilities. That should at least make some PWDs feel less reluctant to contact me. And if you have at lease one picture that is somewhat dev specific in your profile will make it much easier to guess that you're open. But if I understand right the OP was talking about real life encounteres like in a bar or so. For that it's a wee bit more tricky but for example when being openly gay was still dangerous homosexuals would wear a certain type of moustache or an ear ring in one ear to make themselves recognizable to other gay men. My ideas would be: as a dev you could wear a discreet little "awareness ribbon" of a specific colour that's not used for some other purpose yet. As a wheeler what might work is for example some sticker on your wheelchair like this symbol of a woman sitting on a wheelchair guy's lap or if you are more hardcore even more explicit symbolism (for example if you go to a hook up bar). Or accordingly some type of ribbon or similar symbol that you can wear on your clothes or mobility aids. And well then being open and upfront and asking and telling is really a helpful thing too. If you're disabled and somebody hits on you just ask them what they think of your disability and vice versa. Otherwise it would anyways get awequard in the long run eventually. You made some good points here, Dannyboy. slightly off-topic, but you know what - each time I see your profile pic here on PD I’m asking myself „what does that guy in the diving suit do in a Skigondel?“ Very funny picture there. But hot as hell...
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Post by Amee on Mar 3, 2019 11:46:34 GMT -5
And for you disabled bros out there, there's an easy mode for this: Take a good set of pictures, download Tinder and pay for the gold membership. You'll get to browse all the people that matched you, if you see someone interesting, you can match her back. If you've made your disability easy enough for people to notice, the chances are that the people who matched you will be fine enough with it. The algorithm works against us, and I don't like the idea of people running their business on people's loneliness and basic human needs, but it's what it is. Be nice, don't be cunts and don't try too hard. Edit: This works best in places with high population densities. If you live in a small village in Alaska, don't get your hopes up. I've been on Tinder for a while now and I've literally not once seen anyone with a visible disability on it. I do live within Tinder-distance of at least two large cities, so that shouldn't be the problem... I don't know if there are just very few PWDs on Tinder (which I would understand - Tinder sucks in a lot of ways), or if they're just not showing it. But yeah, for me, after a short while I just accepted that I'd have to go for AB guys.
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Post by Tek on Mar 3, 2019 12:23:01 GMT -5
I've not been on Tinder, but I do use a similar dating app where I clearly state my disability right at the start of the profile, and the wheelchair is visible in pictures. Some matches happen, but there can be periods where there's nothing happening.
As for how to recognize each-other... As mentioned before, mentioning "my friend <X>" is a decent way to stealthily do it. As long as there's a name we all could agree upon.
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Post by linda on Mar 3, 2019 12:43:43 GMT -5
I've not been on Tinder, but I do use a similar dating app where I clearly state my disability right at the start of the profile, and the wheelchair is visible in pictures. Some matches happen, but there can be periods where there's nothing happening. As for how to recognize each-other... As mentioned before, mentioning "my friend <X>" is a decent way to stealthily do it. As long as there's a name we all could agree upon. Maybe I just lack imagination, but what am I supposed to do with that? Just randomly saying the sentence out of nothing to someone I don’t know seems a little bit awkward to me... Ah, you mean you just drop the line in the middle of a conversation, like „I was having dinner with my friend Dev the other day...“? That could be a solution.
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Post by Amee on Mar 3, 2019 13:20:45 GMT -5
I've not been on Tinder, but I do use a similar dating app where I clearly state my disability right at the start of the profile, and the wheelchair is visible in pictures. Some matches happen, but there can be periods where there's nothing happening. As for how to recognize each-other... As mentioned before, mentioning "my friend <X>" is a decent way to stealthily do it. As long as there's a name we all could agree upon. Maybe I just lack imagination, but what am I supposed to do with that? Just randomly saying the sentence out of nothing to someone I don’t know seems a little bit awkward to me... Ah, you mean you just drop the line in the middle of a conversation, like „I was having dinner with my friend Dev the other day...“? That could be a solution. That could work, though not for people like me, who are horrible at lying. My cheeks would turn red as a tomato and I'd probably start giggling halfway through the sentence. I guess I'd have to befriend someone, whose name really is Dev, first.
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Post by linda on Mar 3, 2019 13:28:09 GMT -5
Maybe I just lack imagination, but what am I supposed to do with that? Just randomly saying the sentence out of nothing to someone I don’t know seems a little bit awkward to me... Ah, you mean you just drop the line in the middle of a conversation, like „I was having dinner with my friend Dev the other day...“? That could be a solution. That could work, though not for people like me, who are horrible at lying. My cheeks would turn red as a tomato and I'd probably start giggling halfway through the sentence. I guess I'd have to befriend someone, whose name really is Dev, first. It’s funny how you and I seem to have so much in common, Amee. I am literally the worst liar in the entire universe...
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2019 14:38:13 GMT -5
The weird thing is even without a sign or anything I always feel like I literally have "dev" tattooed on my face or that it is spelled out in my eyes or something, especially when I do see a nice looking guy in the wild. And then I become "paralyzed" myself and don't know how to act. Shyness is a pain in the "you know what"... I also can't lie for nothing, that can also be annoying.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2019 16:05:35 GMT -5
Im usually so shocked at actually seeing an attractive pwd that i literally cant react in time ! And boy can those wheelchairs move fast, its a blink and youd miss it moment
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2019 16:10:27 GMT -5
Im usually so shocked at actually seeing an attractive pwd that i literally cant react in time ! And boy can those wheelchairs move fast, its a blink and youd miss it moment Actually just re thought this. You guys just need to slow down, roll past and give us devs a chance to think of something witty to say. Problem solved
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2019 16:21:27 GMT -5
Im usually so shocked at actually seeing an attractive pwd that i literally cant react in time ! And boy can those wheelchairs move fast, its a blink and youd miss it moment Actually just re thought this. You guys just need to slow down, roll past and give us devs a chance to think of something witty to say. Problem solved But we have places to be...
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Post by pam on Mar 3, 2019 19:41:24 GMT -5
The weird thing is even without a sign or anything I always feel like I literally have "dev" tattooed on my face or that it is spelled out in my eyes or something, especially when I do see a nice looking guy in the wild. And then I become "paralyzed" myself and don't know how to act. Shyness is a pain in the "you know what"... I also can't lie for nothing, that can also be annoying. instead of having dev tattooed on my forehead, I feel like I am walking around with a huge secret no one else knows (actually I am) and that if I saw a PWD he would have no idea whatsoever (which he wouldnt). Anyway, I agree that shyness is terrible. Mine was even worse when I was younger so I had zero chance of finding a wheeler. I think if I was single now, I would definitely give cute wheelers a huge smile and maybe they would get the hint.😁
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Post by bojangler on Mar 3, 2019 19:47:06 GMT -5
I think if I was single now, I would definitely give cute wheelers a huge smile and maybe they would get the hint.😁 I can't speak for all men, but as one I feel fairly confident (another of our traits) in saying that when hints are to be gotten... we don't.
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Post by pam on Mar 3, 2019 19:54:44 GMT -5
I think if I was single now, I would definitely give cute wheelers a huge smile and maybe they would get the hint.😁 I can't speak for all men, but as one I feel fairly confident (another of our traits) in saying that when hints are to be gotten... we don't. in that case, I would have to vote for the micro-chip. That would not require me talking to a stranger in public.
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