paruumotto
New Member
Posts: 21
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by paruumotto on Jun 6, 2019 14:53:14 GMT -5
I'm not sure if it is just me or there are are more like me but to tell the truth I'm socially awkward and it is hard to stay social. Is there any tips to get better at being social, especially here. I am sorry if it is a weird post but honestly I need help.
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raindrop
Full Member
Posts: 244
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Married/Domestic partnership
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Post by raindrop on Jun 6, 2019 15:36:16 GMT -5
Message people you find interesting, you won't click with everyone, but some you will. I love it when I get private messages!!! Its fun. Join the Zello group. It's called PD and crew. Good luck!
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Post by robbb on Jun 6, 2019 15:36:55 GMT -5
I don't think that's a weird post at all.
I'm not naturally sociable outside my circle of amazing friends who completely understand me and my slightly eccentric ways.
That said, working with the public for 40 years has made me good at small talk even if I have nothing in common with you or don't care for you.
I guess the only advice I can offer you from that is practice makes perfect.
R.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2019 15:41:37 GMT -5
I think, as far as pd is concerned, dont worry about being social for now, just look on the threads individually and if a topic interests you, comment. You will soon get used to the personalities of other regular board members and find people that have a similar mindset to yours. Dont try to pressure yourself and just give it time. Im sure you will be fine and hopefully meet some new friends along the way x
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Post by lavly on Jun 6, 2019 19:16:48 GMT -5
we have the app called zello. wehere we can chat on topics or even have game nights lol !!!
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Post by dave78 on Jun 6, 2019 21:17:00 GMT -5
I think, as far as pd is concerned, dont worry about being social for now, just look on the threads individually and if a topic interests you, comment. You will soon get used to the personalities of other regular board members and find people that have a similar mindset to yours. Dont try to pressure yourself and just give it time. Im sure you will be fine and hopefully meet some new friends along the way x I've given this advice several times over the last week, it always works. You'll be shocked at how many comments you are leaving, and how many likes you get back in no time. It's going to work out, you just took the first step, now try making some comments. We want your opinion on things. In time you will create your own topics.
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Post by SouthernCalGal on Jun 6, 2019 21:44:00 GMT -5
I have been on PD over a year and I am still getting to know people. It takes time to get the ebb and flow of this board. Stick around, read up, post thoughtful posts - not posts just to get your number up , get to know us and you never know what might happen organically. It's worth putting in the time and effort to get to know who is participating on the board. For devs - this board is a life line to get to know other devs and to interact with PWD's which has been a great experience for me and has helped me to feel comfortable with the feelings associated with being a dev. Enjoy!
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paruumotto
New Member
Posts: 21
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by paruumotto on Jun 7, 2019 8:24:12 GMT -5
Thank you, I will use all of your advice. Is there s special code or something I need for the chat software you use? Zello
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Post by dave78 on Jun 7, 2019 9:43:38 GMT -5
Thank you, I will use all of your advice. Is there s special code or something I need for the chat software you use? Zello No, search "PD and crew" on Zello and give them your username on PD and they will give you unlimited access to the channel. Have fun, buddy!
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paruumotto
New Member
Posts: 21
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by paruumotto on Jun 7, 2019 21:40:39 GMT -5
I was able to log on thank you
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Post by dave78 on Jun 8, 2019 13:56:11 GMT -5
I was able to log on thank you Any time! I hope you had fun!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 8, 2019 18:12:18 GMT -5
I struggle with keeping small talk going. I will reach out to folks and get past the introduction and how are you doings, but shortly after one of us starts one word responding or emoji-ing, and it’s a wrap it up moment.
When I was in school or working daily, I was always the person who was told he couldn’t shut up and could talk about anything. A handful of years in isolation and all that ability feels like something I have to relearn again and failing at doing so.
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Post by dave78 on Jun 8, 2019 18:55:19 GMT -5
I struggle with keeping small talk going. I will reach out to folks and get past the introduction and how are you doings, but shortly after one of us starts one word responding or emoji-ing, and it’s a wrap it up moment. When I was in school or working daily, I was always the person who was told he couldn’t shut up and could talk about anything. A handful of years in isolation and all that ability feels like something I have to relearn again and failing at doing so. The best of us can't keep a conversation going if the reply you are getting back is one or two words. Continuing on at that point feels like talking to yourself. The conversation is over, just say your goodbyes and try again later if you think you have something in common. If you've been out of touch with people for a while it takes time to get back into it. Communication is an artform, keep on practicing.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 8, 2019 23:24:35 GMT -5
I did my own social experiment a few years ago. I had this texting circle of maybe 8-10 people a decade ago. It dawned on me one day that I initiated all of those contacts. I decided to see who would notice or care if I didn’t. A long story short, I got so used to not talking to people that I developed the social part of my anxiety I never had up until this stage. Lovely.
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Post by dave78 on Jun 9, 2019 0:13:05 GMT -5
I did my own social experiment a few years ago. I had this texting circle of maybe 8-10 people a decade ago. It dawned on me one day that I initiated all of those contacts. I decided to see who would notice or care if I didn’t. A long story short, I got so used to not talking to people that I developed the social part of my anxiety I never had up until this stage. Lovely. This happens, people are social animals. We need to interact with others, either online or in person. Continue to reach out and things will turn around. I've been where you are today, and I got better over time. Did you talk with anyone at Sheppard, or anyone in Atlanta? That is going to give you the boost you need right now that will help you manage the rest more easily.
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