mags0528
Junior Member
Posts: 59
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Anxiety
Jun 30, 2019 12:17:53 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by mags0528 on Jun 30, 2019 12:17:53 GMT -5
Hey devs! It’s been awhile since I’ve posted on here, I’ve just been my usual lurker self. I got recently diagnosed with anxiety, and I see how it leaks into my dev side.
I dunno if this is necessarily a dev thread, but I wanted to discuss anxiety in the context of being a devotee.
What are your voices that come up that you have to talk yourself out of? What characteristics of your anxiety bleed into being a dev? Do you feel pressure to be a perfect partner? Do you worry you’re not enough? Do you just generally feel like your anxiety makes you worry about the wellbeing of PWDs out in the world?
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Post by Inkdevil on Jun 30, 2019 17:02:50 GMT -5
Hi Mags. Interesting question. Or questions.
I suffer from anxiety, but I don’t think it’s directly linked to my dev side. I do think the majority of (mostly female) devs I have encountered on this site tend to be of higher than average intelligence. This in turn means they are prone to overthinking - and overthinkers are prone to anxiety, because they overanalyse, dissect and can’t let go.
So anxiety could be linked to devness, but only because of the above I reckon.
I don’t feel anxious about how my devness affects my life or those around me much anymore. I can’t change who or what I am. I am in a consensual relationship with a PWD who both accepts and enjoys what my dev side brings to the table. I’m not hurting him or anyone else by being who I am.
I do often hurt myself mentally with my anxiety though. I’m especially crap in social situations. Sometimes it’s all very exhausting. I had a relationship end badly after a failed marriage and this has left me with a fault line in my mental health. The scars have healed over to an extent, but that flaw is still there and very close to the surface. Without warning my anxiety can break through with very little to cause it.
Keep well Mags. Journal. Eat well. Exercise. Spend time outdoors. With friends. Family. Never take your mental health for granted.
Sorry, I’ve rambled!
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Post by pam on Jun 30, 2019 20:18:19 GMT -5
I do have anxiety but I don't think it is related to my devness. My anxiety around PWDs was worse before I found PD. its calmed down a lot since then. As far as when I was younger, I would definitely have a nervous attack being around any Pwds. Dont think I would have been able to even talk to one, which would not have been good if I was interested in dating one.
I wouldn't worry about not being enough if I were you. If you both feel the connection, then you will both be enough for each other.
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Post by feelsunshine on Jul 1, 2019 4:20:28 GMT -5
Hello Mags, I don't have anxiety, but there is one point I think I can add something to as well. You asked "What are your voices that come up that you have to talk yourself out of?"... Well, the two times that I had something going on with PWDs, that was both one night stand stuff, both times were huge thunderstorms involved. I keep thinking that "the Gods" don't like me being in relationships with PWDs. I really have to tell myself often that this can't be true and that this was just a strange coincidence. But still, the thought sticks. If there's going to be a third time that also involves thunderstorms, that will probably be my sign to go and stick to the AB world then...
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raindrop
Full Member
Posts: 244
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Married/Domestic partnership
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Anxiety
Jul 3, 2019 2:15:42 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by raindrop on Jul 3, 2019 2:15:42 GMT -5
Hello Mags, I don't have anxiety, but there is one point I think I can add something to as well. You asked "What are your voices that come up that you have to talk yourself out of?"... Well, the two times that I had something going on with PWDs, that was both one night stand stuff, both times were huge thunderstorms involved. I keep thinking that "the Gods" don't like me being in relationships with PWDs. I really have to tell myself often that this can't be true and that this was just a strange coincidence. But still, the thought sticks. If there's going to be a third time that also involves thunderstorms, that will probably be my sign to go and stick to the AB world then... I don't know... if you flip that ....maybe they are CELEBRATING!!! LIKE DRUMS AND DANCING!!!!😂🤣😎😍 Thunderstorms are awesome (unless you are outside...then not so much)
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 3, 2019 17:41:15 GMT -5
Hi Mags. Interesting question. Or questions. I suffer from anxiety, but I don’t think it’s directly linked to my dev side. I do think the majority of (mostly female) devs I have encountered on this site tend to be of higher than average intelligence. This in turn means they are prone to overthinking - and overthinkers are prone to anxiety, because they overanalyse, dissect and can’t let go. So anxiety could be linked to devness, but only because of the above I reckon! That right there I think has a lot to do with it. I had a time where my anxiety was worse than other times but I am not on medication or anything. I started exercising and I know my therapist was super happy about that and I can totally tell how it has affected me in a positive way. When I feel anxious or weird I try to hit the gym and it helps me to just work out, lift weights and sweat my butt off. I really like "@undercurrents analysis about the female devs being higher than average intelligent because I believe this to be true. The women I have met on here are deep thinkers and I am amazed how smart they are. I overthink, overanalyze, am very interested in lots of things, very sensitive and emotional and think a lot about life in general. Life does stress me out sometimes and I need a lot of down time and time to myself to keep anxiety at bay. I don't think the anxiety is because of the devness or being a dev causes anxiety. The devness is just another part of very complex women I think, women who deal with lots of things in their lives and are just not your average woman. Sometimes I wish I could be more ignorant and not care but I can't. Sometimes my head is just overloaded with stuff though and it's difficult. Writing, music, and working out help me.
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Post by kyliestarz on Aug 5, 2019 22:35:30 GMT -5
I don’t have consistent anxiety but when I’m worrying about something or have negative thoughts on my mind, getting lost in an hour of devness can be a great escape. There’s just nothing better than settling into the couch with a glass of wine, my iPad and YouTube at the end of the day.
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