me:[e-mail] NEW MEMBER

[zeuss1953pa]

Hello Everyone, I'm a C6/7 Quad for 53 years now. Broke my neck in a diving/swimming accident three days after my 16th. birthday.
I never knew of, or heard of this site or any others like it, until one day on a Spinal Cord Support Group site, there was a thread
about Devotees, and people should be careful if contacted etc.! I read there opinions and decided they were either being misled
about the topic and trying to make everyone else afraid of interacting with anyone with might be a Dev. I see it in my own opinion as
if there is a Woman out there that finds Me attractive/handsome Disability/Wheelchair and All, that's kind of like an ideal scenario Right?
Someone to love, care, be in a relationship and live with, that isn't put off by our disability and possibly requiring a little help. Being
a Dev for a disabled Man is no different than a Man having a fetish of Breast or Butt on a woman? I'd love to hear from some of the
Ladies in here, especially if anyone is located in the NW PA. Region! Attached is a couple pics, Thank You for allowing me to join. Victor.
 

[jrm]

Welcome

[Braced4Impact]

Just a word of advice, unless that email address is one you don't care too much about, you might not want to broadcast it to the world here. Paradevo requires membership to post, but not to look, so unless this is a throw-away email, might want to reconsider broadcasting it.

[blueskye101]

Welcome 🌺

[zeuss1953pa]

Thank You Ladies & Gents for the Welcome. Do any of the members on here ever actually meet in person, for coffee, lunch or d6iscussions face to face? Or only Annomously on here?

[ichbin]

Hi Victor, welcome to PD! Of course some of us meet in person, we had a meetup in Germany last July, and I know people meet in the US as well.

>> I see it in my own opinion as if there is a Woman out there that finds Me attractive/handsome Disability/Wheelchair and All, that's kind of like an ideal scenario Right? <<

I share your opinion, I'm glad you joined even though you've heard/read bad things about Devs.

[feelsunshine]

Hello Victor and welcome.
I think it’s great that you didn’t let them scare you about Devs but rather form your own opinion.
Yes, we exist, we’re real 😉
Have fun reading here!

[zeuss1953pa]

Thank You for the replies. The so called warnings and bad remarks I've read on SCI Support sites, were I'm sure more from people who probably
in fact Never Met in person and had a real conversation with a Dev, and tried to understand your side of the conversation. Just as Gay, Transgenders,
Race, isn't a True Choice each individual person can make! It's makes us part of who We Are as a person. If that means you're a Dev, and I'm your
desire, that's who you are! If I prefer a certain body type woman, over another, that doesn't make me a person everyone should hide/ignore, be wary of??
Some people just jump on the band wagon, follow everyone else, I'd rather think, talk, meet, and decide for myself what is my own acceptable people to
hang out with, be friends with, or associate with. Life's about choices, let's make our own. I see some folks have been truly lucky enough to find
their partner, by the relationship status, Congratulations. can anyone explain how I can move my photo in my original new member message, over to the
silly blank baby square on the left side of posting??

[ichbin]

Jan 31, 2023 14:33:52 GMT -5 zeuss1953pa said:

Thank You for the replies. The so called warnings and bad remarks I've read on SCI Support sites, were I'm sure more from people who probably
in fact Never Met in person and had a real conversation with a Dev, and tried to understand your side of the conversation. Just as Gay, Transgenders,
Race, isn't a True Choice each individual person can make! It's makes us part of who We Are as a person. If that means you're a Dev, and I'm your
desire, that's who you are! If I prefer a certain body type woman, over another, that doesn't make me a person everyone should hide/ignore, be wary of??
Some people just jump on the band wagon, follow everyone else, I'd rather think, talk, meet, and decide for myself what is my own acceptable people to
hang out with, be friends with, or associate with. Life's about choices, let's make our own. I see some folks have been truly lucky enough to find
their partner, by the relationship status, Congratulations. can anyone explain how I can move my photo in my original new member message, over to the
silly blank baby square on the left side of posting??

I'd be interested if it was women who posted complaints about Dev men or vice versa. Or if it was disabled men complaining about gay Devs. 

Knowing so many female Devs and hanging around PD for 10 years now I just can't imagine all the bad remarks are pointed towards female Devs?!

Your profile pic (the "silly blank baby square") you can adjust only via computer, I think, not mobile. You go to Profile > edit profile > upload your pic > click "save avatar changes"

[zeuss1953pa]

Believe it or not, it was Female Disabled Women being creeped out by Men hitting on them! I guess they figured guys wouldn't be interested, unless it happened
through actual face to face meeting, a friend's introduction, or on a so called Real Dating Site? So I guess it was more directed to Male Devs, but I still
don't get why anyone would want to automatically turn away from someone showing true interest in You??

[ichbin]

Nothing new to me. Unfortunately. 🙄 that's what I meant by my reply. The poor disabled women have lots of horror stories to tell about male devs. I totally get they turn away from them.

I'm getting more and more upset that the male dev population often behaves in creepy ways whereas I don't know any female dev who would behave like that.

I want the male disabled population to know there are female devs out there. For all of us to be happy together. Now that I know what it's like I wish everyone could live that dream.

[zeuss1953pa]

I Agree with you 100%. I myself would love to find a female dev for a long term relationship, I'm not getting any younger. lol. But also the same disabled women on those SCI Sites that
get creeped out by someone telling them how pretty, or sexy etc. they look in there posts. If they meet a guy some place in public that says all the same things, and she finds him attractive.
How does she know that he truly isn't a Dev, but just doesn't disclose that to her? For fear of rejection, same as Gays or Trans fear coming out?

[ichbin]

I feel men are often so Sex driven.... I talked to a few men devs and, honestly, no wonder the female disabled are disgusted by them

[ichbin]

I heard an amputee woman once talk about this topic and she said, the less they (men devs) can live in reality what they desire, the creepier they get.

And, as a dev myself, I can relate. I mean, you have this attraction and you have Sexual longings and it's so hard to find a matching pwd... Still, I wouldn't start stalking men or getting all objectifying to the pwds .... And that's what lot of men devs do, unfortunately.

[ayla]

I also think there are a lot of men out there who are attracted to a weak/vulnerable partner and see disabled women as weak/vulnerable. That is NOT the same as being physically attracted to disabled people, the way we here are. Unfortunately those people are still often classed as "devotees."