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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jan 10, 2011 20:04:52 GMT -5
Some things just still make me feel like such a freak, you know?
Like... I think I've got a handle on it and have come to a place of acceptance and then something will come up and I wish, once again, that I wasn't like this.
Vent over.
It makes me tired. =/
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Post by ruthmadison on Jan 10, 2011 20:46:49 GMT -5
I know what you mean. I am upbeat, accepting of myself, I feel in control. But every few days something hits me and I just want to curl up and cry and I wish I wasn't the way I am. So frustrating.
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jan 10, 2011 21:11:04 GMT -5
Yeah, it's been a while since I've been in curl up and cry mode. =/
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Post by BA on Jan 10, 2011 21:19:36 GMT -5
 Sometimes, the curl up and cry just needs to be done. It's cleansing. Hugs to you both.
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jan 10, 2011 21:35:48 GMT -5
You're right... I think I shall paint and cry and have an adult beverage and perhaps a bath.
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Post by dolly on Jan 10, 2011 22:30:04 GMT -5
Some things just still make me feel like such a freak, you know? Like... I think I've got a handle on it and have come to a place of acceptance and then something will come up and I wish, once again, that I wasn't like this. Vent over. It makes me tired. =/ i *do* know. it's exhausting. and depressing. during those times i take comfort in at least knowing there are others here who understand. i spent so many years thinking it was just me. it doesn't really help me feel *better*, but it does make me feel like less of a 'freak'. 'cause even though i feel like a total freak sometimes, i don't think you all are freaks!  well, at least most of you.... lol ....kidding!!! big hug to you, inigo. your plan for the evening sounds like a good approach. |
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Post by Emma on Jan 10, 2011 23:26:34 GMT -5
All I have to say to make you feel better Inigo (and everyone else) is that when you find your guy you will be SO SO happy your a dev. I think I am sexually more fulfilled than my regular, non-dev friends. Its worth the wait just keep yourself out there. It will happen.
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Post by lavly on Jan 11, 2011 2:45:17 GMT -5
i been there girls ... so resently its crazy ... and i came out of it too ... thats sometime the patern ... but when you feel like that ... reach out ... find one of us and be up front about how you feel in that moment... i know i get so much from know you guys know how i feel. so when your in that stage just hit one of your dev girls up ... thats why we are here. hugs to everyone that has moments where they feel like this
( wispers revalution )
ps <3 my T
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Post by ruthmadison on Jan 11, 2011 10:09:40 GMT -5
All I have to say to make you feel better Inigo (and everyone else) is that when you find your guy you will be SO SO happy your a dev. I think I am sexually more fulfilled than my regular, non-dev friends. Its worth the wait just keep yourself out there. It will happen. It is so encouraging to have you here with your experiences. I worry sometimes that maybe having the guy I want won't be everything I hope for, that maybe I can't sustain it, maybe I'll end up disappointed, and then I panic. But to know that it is possible to marry the object of your desire and to have a healthy relationship and a good sex life, there is nothing more encouraging than knowing that. |
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Jan 12, 2011 1:21:06 GMT -5
Exhausting is the perfect word!
Not only am I always fighting my dev demons, but then to constantly have to reach to try to find my guy... I'm not naturally forward that way, and just putting myself out there is terrifying and exhausting. I know the likelihood of a wheeler just, I don't know, falling into my lap is pretty much nil, so I have to push myself WAY outside my comfort zone if I'm really serious... but hell!!! It's just too much sometimes, and I wish I wasn't a dev and I could just be attracted to that guy hitting on me at the bar... it would be so much easier! <sigh>
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Sometimes, the curl up and cry just needs to be done. It's cleansing. Hugs to you both.
well, at least most of you.... lol ....kidding!!!
