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Post by ruthmadison on Feb 20, 2011 10:15:44 GMT -5
Last book club discussion we were talking a little bit about dating sites and I got the idea to create an honest profile on match.com, actually stating that I was looking for a disabled man.
Today I set it up.
Should be interesting to see what happens!
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Post by devogirl on Feb 20, 2011 15:23:41 GMT -5
Let us know! But don't be surprised if guys ignore it. Some guys only look at the photo and don't bother to read the profile, or ignore what it says.
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Post by ruthmadison on Feb 20, 2011 16:41:57 GMT -5
Let us know! But don't be surprised if guys ignore it. Some guys only look at the photo and don't bother to read the profile, or ignore what it says. Yep, already got one wink from a guy who didn't read it at all! I was afraid the system might not accept my profile, but I guess match.com doesn't judge! |
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Post by Emma on Feb 21, 2011 1:39:38 GMT -5
Yeah I too want to hear how it goes!
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Post by ruthmadison on Feb 23, 2011 8:59:55 GMT -5
Man, I just discovered that my D4D profile has been blocked by admin. I guess they finally noticed I was bad mouthing them on their own site.
So far on Match I have a guy with broken legs who wanted to know if I am disabled and that's why I'm looking for a disabled partner.
And a couple more who obviously didn't read my profile.
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Post by lavly on Feb 25, 2011 3:42:48 GMT -5
lol @ them blocking you
but ruth try again .. just start a new one hun ... like a new profile and see what happence ..
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Post by ruthmadison on Feb 25, 2011 7:45:59 GMT -5
lol @ them blocking you but ruth try again .. just start a new one hun ... like a new profile and see what happence .. I tried to do a new one, and the system wouldn't let me! They must have my IP address or something. Maybe I'll try from my work computer... I do dislike them, but I've met a couple cool people there. |
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Feb 25, 2011 10:27:13 GMT -5
If you have a wireless modem, you can disconnect it and let it reset. That should change your IP addy, if that's what's blocking you. That and delete your cookies!!!! D4D is a strange place. I had a woman approach me, assume I was disabled and not letting on, and warn me about devs.  |
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Post by ruthmadison on Feb 25, 2011 11:57:25 GMT -5
If you have a wireless modem, you can disconnect it and let it reset. That should change your IP addy, if that's what's blocking you. That and delete your cookies!!!! D4D is a strange place. I had a woman approach me, assume I was disabled and not letting on, and warn me about devs. Oh man, seriously? That is so sad. D4D is a messed up place, it really is. I've met some very creepy people there, but over the years I did have four dates through them and I've had a few wonderful conversations. Years ago I met a man there who was a closet dev. It broke my heart the way he talked about hiding it and his fears and being convinced that he would never have a relationship with a disabled woman. He was much older than me and his whole life had been that secrecy and fear. It gave me more sympathy for male devs, who do have a pretty bad reputation! |
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Feb 25, 2011 17:56:27 GMT -5
I did meet one nice person there, but overall...strange. You're right, I think the male devs have it even worse. Somehow being a dev seems so much more predatory to the "outside" when the dev is male.  The thing that really got to me about that lady that warned me about the devs... she was very nice, and was honestly trying to help!! But her opinion of devs was just AWFUL.  That's the only time I've ever felt like a monster. |
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Post by Emma on Feb 25, 2011 21:35:53 GMT -5
So did you tell her you were a dev? I love surprising people and explaining that "no, I am not disabled I am a dev myself". Its usually to male devs who think I'm an amputee though.
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Post by ruthmadison on Feb 25, 2011 22:08:14 GMT -5
I seem to have scared the crap out of a female amputee that way, Emma.
I was on yahoo messenger and a new message came in from someone I didn't recognize. Here and disabled dating sites are the only places where I talk about my yahoo ID, so I figured it had to be someone from this world.
Turned out to be a woman and we were trying to figure out how we knew each other, but I was a little afraid to come right out and ask if she was from paradevo! Finally she asks if I'm disabled. And I go "lol. No, I'm a devotee."
Silence.
Finally she says "Oh, I wasn't expecting that."
She said she was an amputee and she seemed really uncomfortable and upset, so I apologized and tried to backtrack, but she didn't really say anything else.
Oops.
I think being a hot girl helps a lot on the creep factor in general. People really aren't able to see me as creepy. Guys usually say something like, if you're a freak then I want a freak.
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Post by Emma on Feb 25, 2011 22:49:03 GMT -5
lol she will be fine. It probably threw her off that there are female devs and assumed that we are like male devs. It's really sad the reputation that male devs have gotten. There are quite a few nice, normal guy devs. They really struggle with finding women who will even talk to them if they identify themselves as devs.
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Post by Emma on Feb 25, 2011 22:59:19 GMT -5
I just came across this quote from a female amputee to people visiting her site.
"I am devotee friendly but I am not creep friendly.
Show me respect and I will show you respect, simple as that"
I think she has it figured out. There is nothing wrong with us, we just need to remember to not be creeps.
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Feb 26, 2011 1:14:01 GMT -5
Nope, I never fessed up. I should have, maybe let her see that I wasn't evil or depraved, but I was still a dev hatchling at that point! Also, I seem to remember that she was a site moderator or something and I didn't want to get booted.
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That's the only time I've ever felt like a monster.