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Post by Dr. BiPAP Sachin on Nov 5, 2019 13:14:26 GMT -5
keep your head up high! We are all dreaming here and I see chances pretty low that all of us dev ladies here will find their cute para (or whatever disability) that they wish for. I have mentioned it many times and will repeat myself over and over again if necessary: I truly believe that there is a significant other waiting for everyone of us, we just have to find them. And, as I said, for most of us, it probably won't be the type of partner that we had wished for, but he/she will be just perfect in the way they are. Whateverdevo.net -- launching January 1, 2024.
I will be designing the forum from scratch in three and a half minute coding sprints every eighteen days. I thought about a more ambitious timetable -- bumping up the frequency to every seventeen days -- but then I said to myself, "Whatever."
Whatever.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 5, 2019 15:25:30 GMT -5
At the risk of being a boring cliche, I have to say that I spent a long time also thinking that I would be alone unless I compromised greatly on what made me happy. Eventually I decided that I’d rather be single than in a relationship that was a compromise. I hate to agree with all those silly magazine articles that say you have to become happy with yourself before you can become happy with someone else.......but in my case it was true. I had to get through losing myself in order to find myself. So good luck, there is someone out there for us all. There are no guarantees that we will cross paths with the right person but it’s worth waiting and hoping because if you do find it, then it’s truly worth it x Personally, and I am not speaking from a place of experience, I wouldn’t mind compromising in a relationship. I mean I wouldn’t compromise to the point of being in a relationship with someone that I don’t like, but I would be willing to compromise to the point of being in a relationship with someone I have at least some things in common with and is down for long discussions on random shit, and isn’t an Ancient Greek beauty (that’s really my main list of criteria for someone I would date). My ideal would be someone who is very similar to me and I know that probably won’t happen. Also I know whoever would be in a relationship with me would have to compromise, and isn’t a good relationship all about compromise anyway. But I don’t really know seeing as I have very little experience, but in theory that’s what I believe. All relationships involve a certain amount of compromise but what i actually meant was that we shouldnt compromise our own identity simply to be in a relationship.
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Post by FlyingBert on Dec 8, 2019 21:32:01 GMT -5
Wait... Are you telling me that I wouldn't be always alone?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 9, 2019 3:47:40 GMT -5
This is my rude comedy coming out....
Easy. I got over being alone by being with someone. I came to the realization...a woman's power derives from the allure of her vagina and breasts.
When you don't have a dick you need to satisfy with every passing ass...women lose their leverage.
I have been told I have sent women home very frustrated. Why? Because they didn't have the balls to make the first move.
I don't have a set of testicles that need a daily depleting. I don't NEED to make the first move.
Now...if I came across a woman with the nerve. Sheeeit. I'll eat that ass and be happy about it.
Do I miss being with someone? Sure but when you tell the wrong person to leave...you can FEEL the weight lift from your shoulders.
9 years alone is tough. 9 years stuck is worse.
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blindgay
New Member
Posts: 5
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
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Post by blindgay on Dec 9, 2019 10:33:27 GMT -5
Non-wheeler here. For me, I go through periods of ups and downs. Sometimes I fully accept that I’ll be alone forever, and then after a couple of months I start to feel overwhelming lonely (which has led me to PD, but I’m glad I found this place).
I try to be positive and change my outlook, because from the outside looking in... it just comes off as negative and no one wants to be around a negative person... Not really. I don’t try to convince myself that I won’t be alone, but rather that I can just put myself out there and see what happens.
Anyways, I just wanted to post that I currently go through the same thoughts too.
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parawheeler
Junior Member
Posts: 66
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
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Post by parawheeler on Dec 9, 2019 11:33:31 GMT -5
I’m a wheeler(I guess my name gives it away)! All my life up until my accident I have mostly had a girlfriend/partner but this past couple of years since the accident I have been alone, sometimes I think to myself am I ever going to find someone again? It’s very strange as in the past I usually had no problem meeting the other sex but since then it seems that girls I chat to on a night out or whatever seem to be distant with me? I think to myself is it the chair that they don’t like?! Sounds crazy but true! Anyway I’m a positive thinking kind of guy so I won’t give up the ghost just yet, I’m a great believer that there is someone out there for everyone no matter what disability you have so keep your chin up all you people!
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Post by Sir Paul on Dec 9, 2019 13:32:15 GMT -5
This is going to sound terrible, but I'd LOVE to find someone that I liked enough to fall in love with! I've just never connected with someone so deeply that I want to be together all the time and set up joint bank accounts. I do get crushes, have desires, crave touch, like flirting and getting to know people. I've had one short term girlfriend in my life and many, many close female friends that never moved beyond the friend stage. I don't know if the issue is primary with me or a combo of me and women in general not viewing me as a potential partner. I have a feeling that unbeknownst to me, after years of not forming romantic relationships, I've become resigned to not having partners and perhaps slightly emotionally detached when it comes to making this connection. It's fine though. I have an awesome group of family and friends that make me feel very loved. That'll have to do
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Post by Hopper on Dec 13, 2019 13:20:09 GMT -5
One thing that's slowly getting me over this eponymous thought is that I've finally allowed myself to accept the fact that people care. Not because they 'feel they have to' but it's genuine a lot of the time. Of course me being the stubborn bugger I can be at the worst of times, haven't realised this until too late with people I'e lost touch with over the years but I'm getting better.
Of course in the new circle of people I've et, there is one (always one) that I feel only talks to me out of what she feels is a necessity, but otherwise I'm very grateful that I'm able to work and enjoy myself with a fantastic bunch of people.
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