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Post by Rob on Feb 14, 2005 14:36:29 GMT -5
Do you have particular places that you get to see disabled guys?
What have been your best sightings?
Whilst I don't loiter in the hope of seeing guys. I live near a big international airport, and a big shopping mall with a wheelchair sales centre nearby. These are great places for sightings.
When I was at the mall a couple of weeks ago I saw a young couple, maybe mid-twenties. He was very handsome and in a chair, she was really pretty. Both very well dressed, trendy without being fashion victims. And they were clearly very loved up, all over each other. The way she was touching and kissing him was really doing it for me.
Despite being 100% gay I couldn't help thinking I'd like to be a fly on the wall of their bedroom.
Rob.
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Post by Lee on Feb 14, 2005 15:29:21 GMT -5
One of my favorite places is gambling establishments. I'd say that Atlantic City is probably the best of all of them. (That's where my story of the same title came from.)
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Post by Paul on Feb 15, 2005 2:42:24 GMT -5
As a wheelchair user, I would suggest anywhere where the public meet that has access..shopping malls. library, pubs, swimming pools, flat areas in town etc. Personally I would suggest you join a charitable organisation or a club which includes disabled people. That way you get to meet the person and not just watch them go by! Who knows what will develope
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Post by Oved on Feb 15, 2005 2:51:19 GMT -5
my sightings almost never have good timing. it's always when i'm in a rush, or with company (who has no idea of my wheelchair attractions) so i have to be casual about it. i finally realize it's all based on "luck."
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Post by Lee on Feb 15, 2005 3:03:32 GMT -5
My best meetings have been by chance. I actually had this really bizarre experience in college that still sticks in my mind. I was in the computer lab when this wc user who I had seen around a lot but never really talked to started using the kiosk next to mine. Naturally, I attempted to start up a conversation, but got interrupted.....
This random girl came over to him and started HITTING ON HIM. It was really strange because apparently he didn't even know her and she just came over with this whole story about how she had a dream about him. The poor guy didn't know what to make of the whole thing. (I always wondered if she was a devo.)
The good that came out of it was that it gave ME an opening to start talking to him..... (I'm a selfish bastard)
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Post by Pisti on Feb 16, 2005 3:43:13 GMT -5
Here, in my country you have very low chance to see someone in a wheelchair, because there are only few places which are accessibles...
If you see someone in a wheelchair he is most probably trying to survive between the rushing cars, because the pavement is inaccesible.
My "favourite" is this office where the disabled people can ask for their social security money. It has two steep and narrow sets of stairs, one right after another, with a total of 20 stairs about. On the bottom is a narrow door, on the top two narrow doors on one feet distance which ones need so much strength to be open that an everage person has problems with it. During my previous job I used to go in the office next door (for some certificates that we pay regularly our tax duties to the Ministry of Workforce) - I never ever saw anyone in the other office (which is the central office in Budapest, so regarding some procedures that is THE place)... Statistically said this might mean that - in Budapest there are no disabled people - or they don't need the money (which is ridiculous)...
But actually this means only that our state institutions are totally insensibles...
Or maybe it works like the bank credits - you don't get any money unless you are able to prove that you don't need it...
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Post by paul wheelie37 on Mar 11, 2005 5:48:21 GMT -5
It took a while for me to get used to pushing around in my wheelchair, specially getting used to people watching me. I used to think it was because they felt sorry for me! Now I keep thinking they may be devotees!!
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Moona
New Member
Posts: 41
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Post by Moona on Mar 11, 2005 8:20:55 GMT -5
One of my favorites is wheelchair sports. I don't have to tell you how much I enjoyed the paralympics last year
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Post by Rob on Mar 12, 2005 11:50:56 GMT -5
I was at the local shopping mall yesterday. While I was looking at something in a shop I noticed a really cute guy coming towards me in a chair.
As the aisle was narrow I stepped to one side and as he passed he smiled at me, a real broad smile with lots of eye contact going on, and said thanks. When he got right to the other end of the aisle he turned round and looked back at me. As I looked back at him he smiled again.
I was just thinking of how I could go up to him and start a casual conversation when this girl appeared from nowhere. He was really gorgeous and in very good shape, now I don't want to be nasty but she was not a looker and was very overweight. He was wearing really nice clothes whereas hers were quite cheap.
They were looking at lamps and things for a house. So the big question in my mind was whether they were a couple, or whether she was his carer, sister or whatever else.
They certainly didn't look like they should be together, but in the end I chickened out and didn't talk to him for fear of making a fool of myself. A straight guy doesn't want to be chatted up by a guy does he?
So what do you guys think I should have done? Should I have taken a chance or played it safe? What would you have done? What should I do if I see him again?
Rob.
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Post by sarah on Mar 12, 2005 20:36:00 GMT -5
Ooh that's a tough one. Depending on the level of his disability, though, you might have been able to figure out whether he needed a caretake or not, and maybe that would have cleared things up or not. If it were up to me, I would at least try to get to know him and be friends, maybe if you see him again ask him(and the woman) to get a drink or a meal somewhere, and it should become apparent whether the two are a couple or not. Even if they are, you aren't losing anything. But if I were in your situation, I probably would have done the exact same as you. I can never seem to muster the courage to initiate conversations w/ paras or quads in public, I always feel as if I will be inconveniencing them lol.
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Post by wheelie37 on Mar 20, 2005 2:34:46 GMT -5
if you meet him again you could possibly get in to a conversation about disabled parking, lack of access, height of shelves, width of isles, where did you get your wheelchair from etc. Those sort of things are pretty good conversation starters! Dont use things like"i had a relation who used a chair", or go in to your medical history for the last 10 years! you can then move on to something like " Are there many bars or pubs you can get in to locally?" You can then maybe go there and devlope a friendship
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Post by Pisti on Mar 21, 2005 6:25:03 GMT -5
Hi Rob, If you see a boy or a girl together this might mean a lots of things... For example I have many good male friends who used to ask me to help them find a present for a female relative, ... And I'm used to go to shop with the very handsome boyfriend of my very pretty sister - I'm not pretty, rather average looking, but I know the taste of my sister more ( and I'm used to have money which is not really the fact in the case of the boyfriend of my sister... ) . Other thing: I would never start a conversation with anyone, but if someone starts a conversation with me I never think that he or she wants anything else as have a nice talk. This caused already some misunderstandings because they didn't only want to have a simple talk...
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Post by wheelie37 on Apr 9, 2005 0:59:28 GMT -5
I agree as in I sometimes wheel around with a close non disabled girl (friend) and we have been mistaken for a couple. The trouble is a lot of disabled people are very insecure and are even more unlikely to make the first move,or start a conversation with someone. I have found it is good to have friendly conversations with people. It also helps to show we are "normal" people with the same feelings, thoughts and inspirations as themselves. If they try to force thier unwanted advances on you then obviously they are in the wrong. I would imagine devotees feel a bit insecure about letting thier true feelings show about people with disabilities. If however they get to know the disabled person, find out where they go, develop a friendship, or if there is an attraction and both are single, maybe more!
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