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Post by merry on Apr 28, 2011 19:14:54 GMT -5
I've been reading back over older threads and was interested to note that at least twice people mentioned a physical feeling when seeing a disabled guy, or a watching a particular scene in a movie (apart from the usual signs of arousal) . I'd thought this was unique to me (silly me - I'm discovering I'm not as unique as I thought!) For me I get a "punch" in the gut - sometimes so strong it actually takes my breath away for a bit (which can make me seem pretty stupid when I'm being introduced to a dis guy for the first time. I think it sometimes gets completely misread as awkwardness, which is actually the LAST thing I'm feeling. In truth the poor guy's unwittingly literally taken my breath away ;D). It can also feel like that incredible tension you get in your gut when you're about to go for an audition or interview or something (BIG butterflies). Anyone else experience anything similar?
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Post by ruthmadison on Apr 28, 2011 20:24:28 GMT -5
I imagine that's why the phrase "takes your breath away" was invented, because it's a standard reaction to an intense physical desire...? That's my guess, anyway.
I get the weak in the knees thing where I can barely stay standing up. I also lose my breath and speak more than talk.
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Post by Emma on Apr 28, 2011 22:05:34 GMT -5
I never had that but I also never randomly met guys with disabilities I was attracted to. I do remember seeing guys with pretty significant disabilities and kind of freaking out and not knowing how to respond with them looking at or talking to me. Now I am able to look them in the eye and smile like I would with any other guy. This is only because my husband and I have been to lots of events for people with disabilities I have met a good amount of guys with various disabilities. I'm much better now and don't typically freak out and ignore the guy. Most of the time I'm capable of suppressing any dev freak out and just being normal and friendly (and then telling you all about the guy).  |
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Post by ruthmadison on Apr 28, 2011 22:36:16 GMT -5
I never had that but I also never randomly met guys with disabilities I was attracted to. I do remember seeing guys with pretty significant disabilities and kind of freaking out and not knowing how to respond with them looking at or talking to me. Now I am able to look them in the eye and smile like I would with any other guy. This is only because my husband and I have been to lots of events for people with disabilities I have met a good amount of guys with various disabilities. I'm much better now and don't typically freak out and ignore the guy. Most of the time I'm capable of suppressing any dev freak out and just being normal and friendly (and then telling you all about the guy). I've gotten a lot better at being normal too. Before I had ever dated a disabled guy it was such a huge deal and I would be overwhelmed with desire+guilt+fear+confusion. I could not deal with it! Probably the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me was when I was (finally) in lunch line right next to my crush, the only boy in high school who used a wheelchair (and he was four years younger than me-shocking!). He even initiated conversation. It could have been so perfect. Instead I completely froze and muttered something ridiculous and absolutely blew it. And I'm sure he thought it was because I'm disturbed by his disability. Little do they realize, I freak out because they're so damn hot. |
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Post by Circuit on Apr 29, 2011 12:28:37 GMT -5
I've had the Gut Punch too. It usually comes along with those "I'd-like-to-talk-to-him-but-don't-know-what-to-say-without-sounding-totally-weird" jitters. Usually, the stuff I have to say is totally weird anyway, but I suddenly get self-conscious about it. >_<
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Post by devogirl on Apr 29, 2011 22:28:43 GMT -5
I know I was one of the ones talking about a physical reaction in that long-ago thread. I don't mean the standard jitters, or pounding heart, sudden blush, or any of the "normal" stuff that happens around someone you like or are interested in. What I was talking about, and I think what Merry has termed the gut-punch, is a sudden sharp sort of twisting sensation in the pit of my stomach that happens when I see something that hits my dev buttons in the right way. It's involuntary, I can't usually make it happen, and it doesn't happen every time. But wow it feels good, if a little shocking. As I recall several other women on here reported feeling the same thing, but maybe not everyone. What I really want to know is, do non-devs feel the same thing ever? I've never asked my non-dev friends about it.
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Post by merry on Apr 30, 2011 3:55:57 GMT -5
I know I was one of the ones talking about a physical reaction in that long-ago thread. I don't mean the standard jitters, or pounding heart, sudden blush, or any of the "normal" stuff that happens around someone you like or are interested in. What I was talking about, and I think what Merry has termed the gut-punch, is a sudden sharp sort of twisting sensation in the pit of my stomach that happens when I see something that hits my dev buttons in the right way. It's involuntary, I can't usually make it happen, and it doesn't happen every time. But wow it feels good, if a little shocking. As I recall several other women on here reported feeling the same thing, but maybe not everyone. What I really want to know is, do non-devs feel the same thing ever? I've never asked my non-dev friends about it. Yes, that's EXACTLY what I was talking about . I have no idea if non-devs feel it, but I would imagine terms like "knife in the gut" etc must have originated from people feeling things like this. Interestingly I have experienced "gut punches" on other situations (without accompanying arousal though) but rarely and then it's always in response to a deep emotion (kind of a DEEP empathy response). I clearly remember as a very young child being deeply affected by a ragged man trying to sell us snacks at a cricket match for example; also had a similar response when I found out that a dear friend of ours had cheated on his wife. Interestingly I felt a kind of slow,deep sorrow for his wife, but a "gut punch" for our friend - we know him really well and I knew that something must have gone very, very wrong for him to have done something that desperate (I was right - they've worked through it and are back together - so at least that's good  . |
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Post by BA on Apr 30, 2011 14:03:45 GMT -5
I believe that all people experience this sensation when something triggers a VERY deep emotional response. Something has to connect with us at an almost primal level. As Devogirl says, this is WAY more than the typical sympathetic nervous system fight or flight rush. For me, it is literally like a lightening bolt has struck my stomach. In addition to this, my hands and feet go ice cold and numb (I suspect all the blood has rushed right to my gut). All this sudden rush of blood to the gut renders me feeling that I cannot move or speak. It is not always positively associated though, as I felt this at the moment of my Mom's death but in the 'dev' context it is peppered with an extreme endorphin rush at the same time, making it quite an overwhelming thing. What do we say, "rooted to the spot?"
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