thatgimpyguy
Junior Member
Posts: 82
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by thatgimpyguy on May 28, 2013 22:13:33 GMT -5
I just became one! Isn't he adorable? His mother and I are so proud. I sure look at the world differently now that I am a father. World, meet my new son, Susan. #proudparent
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Post by Ath on May 28, 2013 23:33:02 GMT -5
me thinks.. susan needs a much bigger bowl
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Post by ProudRealist on May 29, 2013 5:17:53 GMT -5
Don't know...seems like too much responsibility for my liking
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Post by MarineAmp on Jul 24, 2013 12:59:08 GMT -5
I was just thinking how much our son has come along since this last post I made in this topic.
Things are easier and more challenging at the same time. He is crawling around and able to stand up holding onto things, so I am doing a lot more chasing him around, which can be tough if I'm out of my chair, I can sometimes find myself on the complete opposite side of the house. But it is so much easier getting him up off the floor, he likes to use my chair to stand up with or without me in it. If I'm in it he already know how to get into an easy position with his arms raised to come up with dad.
We travel a lot easier now too, I think it is just about repetition. Kind of like learning how to take your chair apart and put it in your car. It is a pain for a while, but it eventually just becomes routine.
I keep waiting for him to get sick of riding on my chair with me, but it has actually turned into a nice relaxation activity. I also have noticed people are way more receptive to me with a baby in my lap vs. just pushing him in a stroller.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jul 31, 2015 22:05:22 GMT -5
My son turns 3 soon, and we also have a girl who is about to be 18 months. Things have definitely been crazy with two kids, one kid is a piece of cake, but two is a full time job.
What has really inspired me to resurrect this thread is the amount of times my son asks me about not having legs. He asks pretty often, maybe once every other day on average, I would estimate. He usually asks me verify that I have no legs, then asks if I hurt my big bone. I think one of the first times I told him, I said something about even my bone being "cut" when I was hurt and now that sticks in his mind.
He is also getting better at realizing that a bunch of stuff on the floor is going to make it hard for me to get through and moves stuff without any prompt from me, which I thought was pretty cool. It will be interesting to see how our girl differs from our boy.
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Post by matisse on Jul 31, 2015 22:50:12 GMT -5
Wow, 3 already!!! Time flies.....
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Post by darthoso on Aug 1, 2015 0:38:01 GMT -5
My niece and nephew moved nearby about a year ago and it has been interesting to see them evolve regarding my disability, especially my niece who turns 10 next month (ugh). She hasn't asked anything about my disability (beyond a sassy "why can't you do it" now and then). That being said they both know the little tricks to helping me out pretty well and need little to no direction.
Tonight my desktop PC was screwed up so I bribed my niece with ice cream to crawl under my desk to fix some wires.
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Post by bowlergrl0524 on Aug 2, 2015 11:31:27 GMT -5
So, I don't exactly have the parent that's disabled, but my aunt is. I was raised by my entire family, not just my mom, so that includes my aunt also. When I was real little, there wasn't much that she could do. She was watching me one day when I was like 2 and I managed to pull a lamp down on myself, and she couldn't stop it or help me. Luckily my mom and grandmother came home about 5 minutes later and got me out. However, as I got older we did more together. We live in the middle of a city and during the summer we used to walk down the street a ways and would go out to lunch and go shopping. This was at least a weekly outing. She used to take me to get free lunches at the park. We used to go out a lot. I used to ride on the back of her wheelchair when I got tired. Of course it was motorized. Her disability is degenerative, and she has gotten worse over the last 10 years or so. Honestly, I have become more bitter towards her. We are still very close, but she does not use any PCAs or anything like that. So all the work falls on me or my 75 year old grandfather. As I've gotten older, I have had a harder time with that. She also acts very helpless, and will ask us to do things constantly that she can do for herself. She works full time as a teacher and I work in the same building. She relies on me too much for everything. So, I guess what I am trying to say here is that if your kid(s) have grown up around you being disabled, it will just be second nature. Half the time growing up they will not see you as different. You will just be Dad. As they get older, they will notice the difference. But it's not a huge deal. Just don't put too much pressure on them to do the physical things. From what I have seen, most of you guys that need a PCA have one, so you don't have that problem. Needing help and relying only on a family member or two are two different things. Children are resilient. They are adaptable. And they will love you no matter what. Kids get mouthy, they say things that they don't always mean. Hope this is a decent perspective for you guys
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2015 15:01:30 GMT -5
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Post by hanabanana on Aug 3, 2015 16:06:55 GMT -5
I'm interested to know how the kids of you guys with disabilities see other people who are disabled. Do they not notice other disabled people? Do they notice them more? Are they more natural around other disabled people than most kids are? I'm talking about random disabled people who they may encounter when they are out and about. My dad has RP(type of progressive eye disease). I notice when there are like... an influx of blind people in the area. I remember once he dropped me off at camp in Minnesota and I kept noticing a bunch of blind people around us and he was like "you must be kidding" turns out there was a blind convention near our hotel! I also noticed this one blind dude always waiting for the subway at a stop I was at around the time I was going home from dance class. I never offered to help since he seemed pretty busy and knew what he was doing, but I mentioned it and it turned out to be one of my dads friends from his cross country skiing program he goes on with a bunch of other PWD. so yeah. I think sometimes I have an advantage of being more "natural" around people with disabilities(when I dont have devy thoughts for them at least). But not that much. May dad only started getting more involved with PWD recently now that he's basically 99% blind now. But I never really go out my way to "help" or "keep an eye out" for PWD, unless I saw a blind guy like... rushing into traffic, then I'd probably take initiative. But BEWARE, canes are painful and you will get wacked. So take that into account before you attempt to 'help'
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Post by Emma on Aug 3, 2015 19:25:20 GMT -5
I've wondered the same thing Inky.
Today I was out with my son (who is almost 3) and we walked past a kid in a wheelchair. The kid was pretty disabled and had a huge chair that was being pushed by an adult. I don't remember exactly what my son said but he commented and pointed saying something like "look". I just responded by saying "yeah he has a wheelchair like Daddy. That was the end of that.
In the past I know he has noticed other people in real life, books or on TV who were in chairs and commented with some thing similar, indicating he noticed. I think once he said "like Daddy" but that's it so far. I'm sure as he is able to articulate more verbally I will get some better answers for you.
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Post by matisse on Aug 3, 2015 20:54:41 GMT -5
Kids in w/c are a totally different story. My kids notice but don't care too much about adults, but kids they notice and stare. And actually, so do I (and so does my wife). Kids in w/c just add a layer of emotion that is not easily numbed, and maybe that's a good thing?
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vancityippy
Full Member
Posts: 209
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Married/Domestic partnership
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Post by vancityippy on Feb 11, 2016 13:26:13 GMT -5
Revisiting this thread after I posted it years ago! Amazing updates from MarineAmp and you too Emma. also great input from everyone else! It is comforting to see and hear that, you just manage... I posted this early on in my relationship as I tried to grapple with the fact that I wanted kids and that I was in love with a quadriplegic. Well anyway, It is nice to read and reread...He and I are actually off to a preliminary fertility consultation today! Time is strange
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