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Post by Clair deLune on May 27, 2015 12:05:19 GMT -5
I don't have to... but if I do, it always ends well I know that's a short and sweet response, and there's loads and loads I could say, but tbh, I'm not that comfortable putting the details of how I approach my sex life out there for public viewing.
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cwbjr
Junior Member
Posts: 56
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by cwbjr on Jun 28, 2015 17:05:41 GMT -5
very much so, and especially lately, which brings me back to this board. i'm in a high-dev cycle at the moment, so i almost have to fantasize with my AB partner in order to get off. it's a bit of a challenge.
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finley
New Member
Posts: 48
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by finley on Aug 21, 2015 10:14:44 GMT -5
I must also be in a high Dev cycle (hence finally joining PD). I fantasizes all the time with my last AB partner. Many a times I told him to "stay still" or "stop moving". I would close my eyes and picture a wheelchair beside the bed. I never told him i am a Dev.
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Post by faith on Aug 24, 2015 1:44:09 GMT -5
I've never been able to orgasm without picturing myself with a quad...or being with someone disabled. After years of being married I know now it was a mistake and no matter how much I loved someone who is AB the sex wouldn't be right. I will never chose an AB partner again. I'm tired of fantasizing... I love the real thing.
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Post by Nia on May 1, 2016 4:29:51 GMT -5
Hey, I'm new here, so I'm sorry if this subject has been covered before. My whole life I have never been able to be aroused (at least to the point of climax) by AB men. I can think an AB guy is smokin' hot, we can have great chemistry, but once it comes to "finishing the job" the only way I can is by imaging a PWD. I'm currently in a long-term relationship with an AB guy, and I always feel guilty about having to do this, almost like I'm mentally cheating on him or something (he knows about my being a dev, but not that I have to do this when we're having sex). I did date a SAK amputee, and it was the best (most frequent) sex I've ever had. I'm not even a huge fan of sex (as you guys discussed in another topic) but with him I craved it like crazy. I feel like I'll never be able to get that back with any AB guy because I'm a dev. It kind of makes me sad. Have you guys experienced this when you were/are with a AB man? Thoughts? First of all I am new here and I am not sure if this is the right way to answer to your post directly:) by clicking quote. Hope it is. I was also never ever in my life able to reach the climax without fantasizing about pwd... Not once. This fact fucked me up really hard because I felt guilt, was convinced that I am a monster and wierdo... Since I am in relationship with my ab boyfriend and since I came out to him about my devness I feel like I'm born again. Not only that he is the one and only guy that I have ever been with with whom I do not imagine someone else but him just without one or both legs but he embraced my devness the best way you can possibly imagine... He plays with me, pretends a bit and he keeps telling me to stop hating myself and to finally embrace my devness and own it.,, i am working on it
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Post by freya on May 1, 2016 14:55:54 GMT -5
First of all I am new here and I am not sure if this is the right way to answer to your post directly:) by clicking quote. Hope it is. I was also never ever in my life able to reach the climax without fantasizing about pwd... Not once. This fact fucked me up really hard because I felt guilt, was convinced that I am a monster and wierdo... Since I am in relationship with my ab boyfriend and since I came out to him about my devness I feel like I'm born again. Not only that he is the one and only guy that I have ever been with with whom I do not imagine someone else but him just without one or both legs but he embraced my devness the best way you can possibly imagine... He plays with me, pretends a bit and he keeps telling me to stop hating myself and to finally embrace my devness and own it.,, i am working on it Hi Nia! First off, congratulations on finally "coming out" for the first time. I know how difficult that can be. You feel like you're going to be called a weirdo or judged. After over a decade of knowing I'm a "dev" I still struggle with the idea that I am getting sexual pleasure out of someone else's pain and misfortune. I know that's not nearly all there is to it, and I'm not a sadist by any means, but I still have guilt. I've had three long-term relationships, and I told every one of them about my "particular tastes" at some point. I just couldn't keep it to myself. Sometimes, I would be caught watching certain movies or videos, and eventually had to explain myself. Some have barely reacted, others have actually been a little bitter. My most recent ex is actually furious and intimidated that I may start dating a guadriplegic because he knows how strong the desire is. He calls it "running after my fantasy." Oh well, I guess he's right to some degree. This community is great, though, because you don't have to feel so alone. I was 11 when I first realized I was a dev, I'm 31 now. There was no internet, no way to even know this was a thing other people experienced. Eventually, by 14 or so, the internet became the best thing that ever happened to me in finding like-minded people and a name to what I felt. It's horrible to keep a secret like that for so long, and feel ashamed. It's wonderful that your boyfriend not only accepts it, but embraces it as well!
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Post by Nia on May 1, 2016 18:21:40 GMT -5
First of all I am new here and I am not sure if this is the right way to answer to your post directly:) by clicking quote. Hope it is. I was also never ever in my life able to reach the climax without fantasizing about pwd... Not once. This fact fucked me up really hard because I felt guilt, was convinced that I am a monster and wierdo... Since I am in relationship with my ab boyfriend and since I came out to him about my devness I feel like I'm born again. Not only that he is the one and only guy that I have ever been with with whom I do not imagine someone else but him just without one or both legs but he embraced my devness the best way you can possibly imagine... He plays with me, pretends a bit and he keeps telling me to stop hating myself and to finally embrace my devness and own it.,, i am working on it Hi Nia! First off, congratulations on finally "coming out" for the first time. I know how difficult that can be. You feel like you're going to be called a weirdo or judged. After over a decade of knowing I'm a "dev" I still struggle with the idea that I am getting sexual pleasure out of someone else's pain and misfortune. I know that's not nearly all there is to it, and I'm not a sadist by any means, but I still have guilt. I've had three long-term relationships, and I told every one of them about my "particular tastes" at some point. I just couldn't keep it to myself. Sometimes, I would be caught watching certain movies or videos, and eventually had to explain myself. Some have barely reacted, others have actually been a little bitter. My most recent ex is actually furious and intimidated that I may start dating a guadriplegic because he knows how strong the desire is. He calls it "running after my fantasy." Oh well, I guess he's right to some degree. This community is great, though, because you don't have to feel so alone. I was 11 when I first realized I was a dev, I'm 31 now. There was no internet, no way to even know this was a thing other people experienced. Eventually, by 14 or so, the internet became the best thing that ever happened to me in finding like-minded people and a name to what I felt. It's horrible to keep a secret like that for so long, and feel ashamed. It's wonderful that your boyfriend not only accepts it, but embraces it as well! [br Hi Freya! Thanks for sharing. I can literary relate to each word you wrote... That terrible guilt that is killing me... That I have sexual excitement over someone's pain... And add to the story bizarre specific preference of mine when it comes to my devness..... I am only interested in disability caused by trauma and injury... Does not work for me if it is given by birth... Right now I HATE myself for even saying this... What kind of a person can have such feelings and what kind of a rare animal am I... You are right when you say that I am super happy to have my boyfriend excepting my devness so good. But.. Always that fucked but... He is my first partner ever who I "use" in my fantasies... All my life, up to him (and we are together for a year and a half) My "method " for reaching the climax was fantasy about some either imaginary either real man with disability of my preference. With him I only use him just changed in my mind... And the more I do this the more guilty I feel because I've came to the point when I am constantly literally hoping that something will happen to him causing loss of one or both legs. I can not stop those thoughts. I can not. I am ar the verge of breake down. I told him everything and he told me that he understands and that I should not feel bad and I am thankful for those words but they are not comfort for me.... I am a monster and I do not believe that there is a way for this feeling and hate I feel for myself to disappear....
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Post by Maurine on May 1, 2016 19:21:11 GMT -5
That terrible guilt that is killing me... That I have sexual excitement over someone's pain... And add to the story bizarre specific preference of mine when it comes to my devness..... I am only interested in disability caused by trauma and injury... Does not work for me if it is given by birth... Right now I HATE myself for even saying this... What kind of a person can have such feelings and what kind of a rare animal am I... I'm the same. I'm only interested in disability caused by trauma and injury. (Not exclusively, but it's the only thing that really turns me on.) Moreover, I'm very interested in how a hot guy was injured. I don't think we have to feel guilty for this. It's just the way we are. It's not us who cause the injuries. People are injured all the time, it's just a fact of life. Also, is it really pain and suffering that fills you with sexual excitement? Or does it just bother you that you get pleasure out of something that might cause pain in somebody? I completely understand that you feel guilty for hoping that your boyfriend will lose one or both legs. I know how strong a dev's desire can be. On the other hand, I'm sure you would never ever cause injury. It's just the way you would be most attracted to him. I think it's great that your boyfriend is so understanding and that you talk about this so openly with him.
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Post by Nia on May 1, 2016 19:42:46 GMT -5
That terrible guilt that is killing me... That I have sexual excitement over someone's pain... And add to the story bizarre specific preference of mine when it comes to my devness..... I am only interested in disability caused by trauma and injury... Does not work for me if it is given by birth... Right now I HATE myself for even saying this... What kind of a person can have such feelings and what kind of a rare animal am I... I'm the same. I'm only interested in disability caused by trauma and injury. (Not exclusively, but it's the only thing that really turns me on.) Moreover, I'm very interested in how a hot guy was injured. I don't think we have to feel guilty for this. It's just the way we are. It's not us who cause the injuries. People are injured all the time, it's just a fact of life. Also, is it really pain and suffering that fills you with sexual excitement? Or does it just bother you that you get pleasure out of something that might cause pain in somebody? I completely understand that you feel guilty for hoping that your boyfriend will lose one or both legs. I know how strong a dev's desire can be. On the other hand, I'm sure you would never ever cause injury. It's just the way you would be most attracted to him. I think it's great that your boyfriend is so understanding and that you talk about this so openly with him. Thank you for such nice words... Of course I WOULD NEVER EVER CAUSE him injury. I love him so much that I feel his every pain and suffer and I would rather die then cause him one.... And it is not the pain that arouses me... It is the very thought of the strength in that person (man) must have had to overcome what happened and to continue with life... Something like that.... For me they are untouchable heroes in front of whom I feel bad, small and unworthy of their time... That is why I have never ever not only dated but even got courage to make friends or any kind of connection with pwd... I am convinced that all of them would literally spit on me if they figured out about my devness....
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Post by strawberrybubblegum on May 2, 2016 0:35:54 GMT -5
I am convinced that all of them would literally spit on me if they figured out about my devness.... Don't be so hard on yourself. I also used to think PWDs would be disgusted by the idea of people being sexually aroused by them, too, but just look around here. I've talked to a bunch of disabled guys over the last year since I found out about my devness and they were all either cool with it or they even liked the fact that some people have this preference. If you read a bit around the boards, you'll see that some guys even prefer devs over non-devs, that we give them confidence and can make them feel good about themselves. When the guy's open to it, the dev-dis connection can be such a special thing. And of they're not, then they're not, but that's not your problem and no reason at all for you to feel bad about yourself. I still struggle myself sometimes with these issues, but I know the great things that can come out of it, too, and those definitely outweigh the "bad" stuff.
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