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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2016 22:21:27 GMT -5
Really high quadriplegia would be a nice torture tactic. Only problem is you'd have to spend a lot of money to keep them alive. I can think of cheaper ways to hurt people. It does have a nice psychological element to it though.
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Post by Emma on Jul 14, 2016 22:23:43 GMT -5
I have wished my devness on some of my non-dev friends who don't like sex but it gets complicated because than I'd also have to find them the right guy which we all know is super hard.
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Post by harmonniousvision on Jul 14, 2016 22:31:24 GMT -5
i think wishing devness on people wouldn't be a bad thing per se... i don't see it as an evil curse or anything and it would foster understanding... open minds and all of that...
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Post by matisse on Jul 14, 2016 22:35:02 GMT -5
I would definitely wish it on folks for a few days, but they would have to be a combination of good days and bad days. A travel day would definitely be included so they could experience the hassle, swelling, and all-to-frequently having to deal with people who are supposed to help me but don't understand a word of English. But I would also go back in time a little to when I still actually stood under my own power to shower. That was a harrowing experience that I experienced and dreaded every day. Then a normal day or two where nothing bad happens and they can just get a sense of the time/effort it takes to do things.
I'd wish it on my wife, kids, co-workers, and anyone who has ever voted to raise my taxes.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2016 22:41:19 GMT -5
No. I have a firm belief that my parents should have aborted me when they found out my mom was pregnant. I had an older brother who also had SMA, so by the time I came around they had already known the chance for me to have SMA was rather high. I would not wish any kind of disability on anyone, no matter who they are, even ISIS. A disability is too good for the kind of stupid they are.
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Post by wheelsfordays on Jul 14, 2016 22:43:24 GMT -5
Not on my worst enemy.
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Post by midwestguy on Jul 14, 2016 22:43:32 GMT -5
Ummm maybe :/
I've definitely seen people and thought "what a waste of a perfectly good spinal cord."
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Post by Corey on Jul 14, 2016 22:49:36 GMT -5
For a few days, I think it would be beneficial for some people, especially those who work with the disabled.
I have some PCAs who just 'get it'. They know exactly what I need without me telling and they can tell when Im uncomfortable. But I have other PCAs who have no idea what I need unless I explicitly tell them. I think if they spent a day or two in a chair they'd get it a bit more.
Also the people who work in the ADA office at my school like putting buttons for doors really high up or in corners where I cant reach them. Again I think being in a chair for a day would help.
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Post by frankj on Jul 14, 2016 22:52:11 GMT -5
A previous employer who sacked me because of my disability. Those bullies from school. That would be a sweet revenge...
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Post by Paradise on Jul 14, 2016 23:06:02 GMT -5
Sure, as a dev, I've thought more than once that it would be nice to spread my particular devness to other girls, like a lovesick virus but in a positive way. I've thought of all the dis guys out there that NEED to experience the light of a good dev, and all the girls who feel the dev but just haven't ever let it be free - why not give them a dose of what I've got? But then I think that's rather grandiose thinking on my part, because there are still potential pitfalls - like the slight stigmatization and misunderstandings I've experienced in the past. But I've also seen how those things can be overcome as well. But my particular dev is special to me and I don't really want to give it away to anyone else.
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Post by harmonniousvision on Jul 14, 2016 23:15:23 GMT -5
i think wishing devness on people wouldn't be a bad thing per se... i don't see it as an evil curse or anything and it would foster understanding... open minds and all of that... That was my initial instinct answer to my own question too. But- it also is extremely limiting when it comes to finding a relationship that hits all or most of your buttons. Way more limiting than the average non-Dev, IMO. So in that sense, I don't know. Not that I feel cursed in anyway, It's definitely been a blessing in many ways. The highs and lows can be difficult, but also amazingly gratifying. So I'm torn. I think I'd make it more a temporary thing. I agree and i wouldn't say permanent but i don't think they'd have to even find a relationship ya know many of us don't or haven't really truly lived in our "dev fantasy." I only got to for a week and it was even my devviest trigger... (Sorry blindguitarist) I think it would be beneficial just to like experience the highs and the confusion.. the intense sexual attraction... Aside from my first sexual partner the best "real life" sex I've ever had in my life was with a PWD (hope that helps you feel better blindguitarist) and piggy backing off what Emma said about her friend's not liking sex i wonder if non-devs experience sexual attraction in the same way devs do? Opening minds tho... ya know isn't that what we want is a world where people are all seen equally... equally valuable, equally worthy, equally lovable and deserving of sex!! If sharing my devness helped open the minds of women who instantly discredit and refuse a man because of his disability i would gladly share it... I'd want it back of course cuz AB sex meh...  How many amazing guys are here... guys who truly would make a woman very happy and yet their playing field is so limited because women make snap judgements and don't see a man who's worthy of loving or even worth a good ol one nighter... part of my devness is wanting that for them... and good golly helping to show them that women like ME exist and maybe giving hope... |
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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2016 23:34:26 GMT -5
Out of the blue, this question popped in my head the other night, and I asked my husband, "would you ever wish your disability on anyone?" Im not sure how I meant it- revenge on your worst enemy, or just as a temporary "know how it feels" experience. He said no very quickly, which is pretty telling how he feels about it. Pwds: would you? For any reason, temporary, permanent, lesson learner, or plain old mean revenge. Maybe you don't think your disability is a big deal and think everyone should get one. Idk. Be creative. Devs: would you ever wish your devness on someone? Not even on an individual that raped and killed a loved one. If I felt that strongly.. I would take their life... and live with the consequences... Ideally, I would let the law take it and have them serve justice. |
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Post by newjess on Jul 14, 2016 23:40:07 GMT -5
I don't think I could wish the decade of confused self-loathing, guilt, and shame on anyone... but post-acceptance devness is a wonderful, beautiful thing. So, I would say if they would accept themselves for it then I would wish devness on others.
As others have mentioned the hard part is finding that partner that not only aligns with your devness but is compatible overall. But who knows, maybe it's more meaningful when it does happen for devs... so we cherish it more than typical AB partnerships do. Hard to say though.
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Post by strawberrybubblegum on Jul 15, 2016 3:14:06 GMT -5
Actually, I'd wish a few moments of experiencing being paralysed on myself. This would answer a lot of my 'what does it feel like' questions. +1, but make it a few weeks (and I'd like to experience paraplegia as well as low quadriplegia and also the exact injury my boyfriend has). First and foremost I'd wish a few days of devness on my boyfriend, so he can finally understand and see himself through my eyes, see the beauty and sexiness I see in him that he doesn't. |
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lacuna
Junior Member
Posts: 84 
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by lacuna on Jul 15, 2016 3:34:15 GMT -5
I think I would (maybe not permanently) not the bullies or the ignorant (fuck them!) I'd go for the patronising and condescending! Those
eejits are the worst and need to walk more than a mile in my AFOs to be educated.
Thinking about it, and I appreciate all the PWDs that have posted saying how they wouldn't wish it on their worst enemy, and I understand that every situation is different and I can't speak for other people. However I think if people had
the opportunity to share an intimate snapshot of their existance (disabled or not) you should, think about how much bullshit could be eliminated if everyone had some real insight into the life of another. To me that would be wonderful.
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How many amazing guys are here... guys who truly would make a woman very happy and yet their playing field is so limited because women make snap judgements and don't see a man who's worthy of loving or even worth a good ol one nighter... part of my devness is wanting that for them... and good golly helping to show them that women like ME exist and maybe giving hope... 
