The Undateables. Thoughts?

[Deleted]

I just stumbled across this series and it’s rather fascinating. We have no kind of focus on disabled dating like that in America to my knowledge or I would sign up to be on it

[napoleon]

Ehh, can take it or leave it. I auditioned for it but I'm clearly too functional a disabled person.

[Hopper]

I like it, but it's marketed and sometimes presented as a strange mixture of inspiration porn and a Victorian Freak Show.

So it's good, but the presentation is somewhat misguided.

One step forward, two steps back.

[Deleted]

After one full episode it feels like it could have scripted parts as per any reality show. Which I found disappointing as it hurts the authenticity of the concept.

I too feel I would not qualify for what they are liking for. They clearly want ratings so they pick the most “interesting” people to cast instead of making it more of just a documentary

[Hopper]

I agree, the scripted aspect is terrible.
It's not only sickeningly sentimental but somewhat insulting. Maybe even redundant.

In other words, as a show that aims to show PWD's in a positive way, why script it? Why take the real out of reality?

Oh, of course, PWDs aren't nearly as interesting when they aren't being 'endearingly' awkward or 'inspirational'.

I do realise that a script can be a good tool but only when used sparingly.

[limplegs]

I can't decide if it's good or bad for PWDs that this show exists. On one hand it's good to give people an insight into what these folk go through in their quest for love, on the other hand they're labeling them as undateable.

An AB person who watches the show may see a PWD in the wild and immediately think "undateable", which is bad. It also normalises disability a bit more, which is good.

I don't particularly like the show though. I get pissed off when I see someone let their disability get the better of them. There are some people on the show that are far from undateable, but they've let their disability take over their ego to a point where is holding them back. They need to improve that before they go on any dates. Their mind is the problem, not their impairment.

[mona]

Feb 6, 2018 7:24:03 GMT -5 napoleon said:

Ehh, can take it or leave it. I auditioned for it but I'm clearly too functional a disabled person.

What did they ask you at the audition? What was it like?

[Inkdevil]

I watch it religiously every week, but I’m left with mixed feelings about it - in terms of how it reinforces the stereotype that disabled people all need help to find a date and maintain a relationship.

I’m also not keen on the way they mix the programme up between physical and mental disabilities. I think some people already have this idea that anyone with a physical disability is also mentally impaired and this programme probably further blurs those lines for them.

It can be entertaining, but the programme makers properly play on this as a chance to make good television out of people’s impairments.

I’m not sure it does what it should be doing in terms of raising awareness. Missed opportunity. I think First Dates does a better job on the occasions they have disabled people on. Channel 4 normally thinks a bit more outside the box with its programming tbh.

[napoleon]

mona they were actually really nice. They came to my flat, asked a friend and I lots of questions about love and relationships and dating with a disability. I played guitar and they asked me to play a love song...I didn't know any, so that crashed and burned! Then one of the girls said she could sing so we ended up jamming for a few minutes lol. We then did some outside shots of me walking with a cane etc. As I said, never got used though.

[Deleted]

All very valid points. I struggle with my feelings on the show after a few episodes for a few reasons. As stated above, the mix of mental and physical disabilities should not be lumped together. It’s insulting to give the idea that dating someone with Tourettes has the same obstacles as dating myself confined to a chair.

What this show isn’t doing and what it should be doing is helping to bridge the gap in social stigmas between ABs and PWDs. This show merely stirs the pot with it between the awkward moments and even the PWDs being disappointed to be matched with someone else with a PWD. The entertainment aspect sheds a terrible light on how actual everyday relationships would go

[LaMara]

I saw maybe half an episode long ago and found it unbearably patronising and pure inspiration porn.
What I watched was mostly about mental disability and the way the participants were shown/treated just rubbed me the wrong way.
I agree that mixing people with mental disabilities and physical disabilities is a bad idea because it perpetuates some really ridiculous stereotypes.
The show itself is almost insulting because it’s like shouting DATING ANY PWD IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE AND UNUSUAL AND DEFINITELY NOT A NORMAL EVERYDAY THING! IT’S SOMETHING TO STARE AT WIDE EYED!
If you want to watch UK tv that treats disability then watch The Last Leg: they legit make stupid politically incorrect jokes about disability at least twice every episode, and it’s charming and adorable

[Hopper]

Agreed with The Last Leg.

The contrast between UD and TLL is mind-boggling.

Even that strange 'YES I CAN' campaign for the paralympics one time wasn't as bad as the Undateables.

Mind you, you do win by default in Hopperland by using Sammy Davis Jr.

I'd also recommend the short lived prank show "I'm Spazticus!" if you like TLL.

[LaMara]

Feb 7, 2018 10:38:28 GMT -5 Hopper said:

Agreed with The Last Leg.

The contrast between UD and TLL is mind-boggling.

Even that strange 'YES I CAN' campaign for the paralympics one time wasn't as bad as the Undateables.

Mind you, you do win by default in Hopperland by using Sammy Davis Jr.

I'd also recommend the short lived prank show "I'm Spazticus!" if you like TLL.

They sent a prosthetic leg into orbit.
They give one of the hosts shit about his “tiny hands” every 15 minutes.
They constantly say the one host who’s not disabled is a honorary pwd.
They’re dumb and funny and I love them.

[frankj]

They have the same show in a Dutch version as well. That is done rather respectable towards the people participating. Sure, sometimes it is difficult to watch, but it never feels like the participants are put on display. The British version is much more cringe worthy to me...

[britishtetra]

If you can keep your head when all others are losing there’s.....

I’m a single man living in the Uk and it’s hard having a being disabled and living here, our infrastructure is rubbish. We get treated like crap, I have thought about going on this show myself to find a relationship but my sisters told me no. This is because I have a tendency to take the mickey out of everything, and say things without thinking.
The shows main aim is to find people love, you cannot fault its principal aim but it needs more diversity in what range of disabilities it covers.

Pete