Dreaming of being AB or not

[Deleted]

All my dreams are usually in first person mode like I’m in a video game. I know I’m usually low to the ground so I’m assuming I’m still a wheeler or I just move on an escalator track that doesn’t elevate.

[loreley]

My partner has had primary progressive MS for 18 years now and has been using a wheelchair fulltime now for about 3 years. He still dreams about being AB, recently (after a good physio session where he could actually walk a few steps almost unaided) even so wildly that he fell out of bed at night, because he dreamt he was running. He says he either dreams about activities he used to like (like dancing) or he has dreams where he mixes being AB and PWD, just like you described it - so he will be on the dance floor, dancing away only to sit down in his wheelchair once the song is over.

[Deleted]

I'm still in the phase of dreaming mostly as an AB.... and part of me suspects I always will.... As I have ALWAYS said... As long as I am breathing I can and do find joy in life.. live it to its fullest... and enjoy it... BUT I will never be "ok" with this injury. I'll never accept it in a true sense of the word... I've accepted that this is the way I have to live now. I have a great life... I'm glad I survived... My life is full in so many ways.... And I do have occasional dreams where I am a wheeler... like skiing down a mountain... something I never did as a leg walker... BUT I think that's a function of dreaming about what I enjoy and enjoyed doing.

Consequently my nightmares almost always are me as a leg walker.. with one exception.... but nightmares are more dependent on what I'm experiencing and seeing around me.. more than my previous or current state of living... AB or not.

Interesting topic.. thanks for starting this thread.

[TotalBias]

@tykes This is fascinating. Thanks for sharing!!!

I can’t weigh in as a PWD obviously, but I wanted to share that in my dreams people are frustratingly hardly ever PWD. Even the two guys I dated with SMA show up in my dreams primarily as AB. I totally know it’s them even though they look different. Sometimes I’m accepting of it. Sometimes I’m like where’s your wheelchair? Lol.

[Deleted]

I rarely remember my dreams but I'm a wheeler in all of them, I think. What's weirder for me is that I think I forgot how to walk. Like, if I was cured today with no muscle atrophy or anything, I seriously don't know if I could. It's a brain twister to think about. That's why I'm such a sucker for hand massages. I LOVE watching someone move my fingers around and I pretend that I'm doing it.

[propheticstature]

Rough estimate here, but I'm only in my chair for about... 20% of my dreams? I'd say about 20% where I pretty much look down and see the chair, and I'm getting around pushing. About 30% is how @theboulder88 said--kind of a first person perspective. The other 50% I'm walking, and often look down and see my legs moving. Whenever I have any kind of sexual encounter in my dreams, I'm always an AB again. I can't ever remember a sexual dream I've had where I've ever been paralyzed or in my chair. I'm always moving my hips and from the way I dream, I can feel everything. Sometimes I've been startled awake by people during one of these and got paranoid the first few seconds after being woken up because I assumed I was still moving my hips, haha. The part of my brain that would control that part of my body if the SCI never got in the way is firing off on all cylinders, but luckily there's no "motion in the southern ocean" that would embarrass me if someone had been looking at me when they woke me up.

And @tykes , as someone who's "living the dream" (sorry, I really couldn't help myself there), I should tell you that it's not that great, at least not to me. I much more enjoy the fact that it was sex, than the fact I was moving again, if that makes sense? I regret waking up because the sex stops, not because the feeling stops. But if you want to test the waters, I would look up lucid dreaming. I often remember dreams without any effort when I take a nap, especially in a contorted/uncomfortable position, or if sleep less than about 2 hours. A solid 7 is always dreamless. Either way, there's lots of videos on Youtube and guides around the Internet that'll show you how. I've only ever dedicated myself to it once and couldn't get it to work, but I have friends that swear by it, so YMMV.

[wonk]

Tykes, I have been in a chair a similar amount of time to you, and my dreams are basically about one third wheeler, one third AB, and one third gumby walker, or started to recover sensation, even though my injury is complete.

I often have dreams that I can walk short distances, and have to pull my chair up steps. One dream I have that has become one of my only phobias (and freaking venomous snakes lol) is that I can walk, but I am bare footed and have to watch my feet very carefully as I can't feel them, and I worry I will skin my toes. Watching my niece and nephew run with bare feet on concrete is almost like running fingernails down a chalkboard.

The reason for my reply today on xmas is that last night I had my first ever dream that I was using a power chair. I started using one about a month ago if I had to push a few miles, or if I needed to pull my chair in and out 5 or 6 times in a day. I still use the manual chair 80-90% of the time.

Sex dreams are about 50/50 AB/para

[jbird]

My condition doesn't seem to play much of a factor in my dreams, despite being disabled my whole life. When I dream I feel almost weightless, like I can do anything.

[frankj]

Yeah, I used to dream of being AB. Still do, sometimes. Which is perhaps a bit strange, since I have always been disabled.

[probably]

I have a ton of those partial recovery dreams that wonk mentions. I'm always doing some sort of physical activity that I shouldn't be able to do, telling myself that it'll work out as long as I don't push myself too hard. The whole dream is spent being worried and unsure of the limitations of my recovery.

[el_steveo]

I've been in a chair for 30 yrs and I occasionally dream that I'm walking. when I do I'm very aware of it. the dreams always seem so real and I always keep repeating to myself "omg its not a dream this time...its not a dream this time" then I wake up.

[gimpygay]

I am either rolling in my wheelchair or an observer as if I am watching a movie. My dream perspective may be affected by the fact that I have always been a wheelchair user.

[Deleted]

Dec 28, 2018 10:21:43 GMT -5 @raaspberi said:

I must stop eating cheese before I go to sleep!

You’re not truly living if you do that. You’re merely existing.

[abdifatah28]

I'm mostly AB in my dreams