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Post by sy on Mar 7, 2024 16:34:58 GMT -5
So I go to a very special gym that was designed with disabled people in mind, I would say 80% of the equipment except the treadmills and the other lower body workout equipment is accessible.
Now the reason I know they might be a Dev is, because whatever I approach the weightlifting rack and awkwardly position my hands I noticed a woman start to rubberneck start smiling and stop working out until I complete my set. I have noticed this girl doing this for the past month to 2 months.
Anyway I want to confront and talk to this girl but I am not sure if I should bring up that she might be a dev.
So my question is for the devs how do I handle this I have never met your kind before.
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Post by ayla on Mar 7, 2024 17:16:37 GMT -5
I'm pretty much as curious and clueless as you when it comes to devs in the wild! The first thing that I wonder is, are the people who choose to come to a forum like this one much different from the people who don't think as much about their attraction?
But setting that aside for the moment -- are you attracted to her? Or do you just want to "confront" her and find out if she is a dev? If it's the first option then I'd say approach her like anyone else. Smile, strike up a friendly and casual conversation about the gym or whatever seems most natural, mention you've seen her there a few times (don't mention you've caught her rubbernecking). If you're not attracted to her and you're just curious what her deal is: MIND YOUR BUSINESS unless her rubbernecking and smiling is making you uncomfortable and you want her to stop. In that case, politely ask her to stop.
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Post by sy on Mar 7, 2024 17:34:23 GMT -5
I'm pretty much as curious and clueless as you when it comes to devs in the wild! The first thing that I wonder is, are the people who choose to come to a forum like this one much different from the people who don't think as much about their attraction? But setting that aside for the moment -- are you attracted to her? Or do you just want to "confront" her and find out if she is a dev? If it's the first option then I'd say approach her like anyone else. Smile, strike up a friendly and casual conversation about the gym or whatever seems most natural, mention you've seen her there a few times (don't mention you've caught her rubbernecking). If you're not attracted to her and you're just curious what her deal is: MIND YOUR BUSINESS unless her rubbernecking and smiling is making you uncomfortable and you want her to stop. In that case, politely ask her to stop. I'm not easily bothered by someone looking at me, but yeah I think she's pretty cute that's why I want to approach her. What do you think might she be a dev? |
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Post by Enid on Mar 7, 2024 18:10:49 GMT -5
I'm not easily bothered by someone looking at me, but yeah I think she's pretty cute that's why I want to approach her. What do you think might she be a dev? Why does it even matter? She might but maybe she's not. Try talking to her instead, without asking that at the beginning. |
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Post by sy on Mar 7, 2024 18:25:00 GMT -5
I'm not easily bothered by someone looking at me, but yeah I think she's pretty cute that's why I want to approach her. What do you think might she be a dev? Why does it even matter? She might but maybe she's not. Try talking to her instead, without asking that at the beginning. Well I'm going to approach to regardless but knowing would make me more comfortable. Believe it or not most men are not comfortable approaching a woman in a gym especially nowadays. Knowing whether she is or isn't checking me out because she has a attraction to me rather than curiosity would make me a little more confident in talking to a girl at the gym. |
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Post by blueskye101 on Mar 7, 2024 19:13:44 GMT -5
So I go to a very special gym that was designed with disabled people in mind, I would say 80% of the equipment except the treadmills and the other lower body workout equipment is accessible. Now the reason I know they might be a Dev is, because whatever I approach the weightlifting rack and awkwardly position my hands I noticed a woman start to rubberneck start smiling and stop working out until I complete my set. I have noticed this girl doing this for the past month to 2 months. Anyway I want to confront and talk to this girl but I am not sure if I should bring up that she might be a dev. So my question is for the devs how do I handle this I have never met your kind before. Definitely go up and talk to her. Can just be friendly and come up with chit chat to get the ball rolling. Don’t mention the Dev thing. Who knows if she’s a dev but even if not might be interested. Also, I would be pretty freaked out if someone started out a conversation that way. |
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Post by ichbin on Mar 8, 2024 0:38:06 GMT -5
Why does it even matter? She might but maybe she's not. Try talking to her instead, without asking that at the beginning. Well I'm going to approach to regardless but knowing would make me more comfortable. Believe it or not most men are not comfortable approaching a woman in a gym especially nowadays. Knowing whether she is or isn't checking me out because she has a attraction to me rather than curiosity would make me a little more confident in talking to a girl at the gym. You can't tell from just the looks of her. Neither can any of us. Whether or not you feel comfortable talking to her you'll find out when you do so and not by "knowing" if she's a dev or not. Never ever would I bring that up in a first conversation. The poor girl might not know herself what's going on inside of her. Just be open and try to put aside the labels. Feel the moment instead. |
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djkream
New Member
Posts: 24
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled
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Post by djkream on Mar 8, 2024 2:22:22 GMT -5
I'd talk to her first like any other person.
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Post by lisa on Mar 8, 2024 3:42:55 GMT -5
What the other devs said. Also, the dev numbers in the general population are probably very low. So chances that she isn't a dev are probably much higher. Maybe she's just interested in you without being a dev. That's possible and even more likely. I know it might not seem that way here on PD, but there are few devs out in the wild. Even if she is one, she might not have figured it out yet or admitted it to herself. So please, don't ask her about it.
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kwhi13
Junior Member
Posts: 89 
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Post by kwhi13 on Mar 8, 2024 7:22:55 GMT -5
The ladies offer good advice here…
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ParaDevGuy
New Member
Single
Posts: 37
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by ParaDevGuy on Mar 8, 2024 9:10:57 GMT -5
If you want, I can…uh…come to your gym and watch you work out. Then you can compare my reaction to hers. 😂
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quarantinetoughguy
New Member
Posts: 31
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by quarantinetoughguy on Mar 8, 2024 14:05:02 GMT -5
Lol. Just because someone is curious and friendly, doesn't make them a Dev.
How about instead of imagining all the scenarios -- next time you just say hi and go from there?
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Post by Dani on Mar 8, 2024 19:43:11 GMT -5
Yeah, I echo what the other devs say. Don't mention anything "dev"; just strike up a normal convo or smile back at her or something.
Devs in the wild are rare, I think, and if you start talking about devs, she may think you're crazy because she has no idea what that even means. So definitely don't mention that and yes, does it matter? She may just be friendly and curious, but if you smile back, maybe a chit-chat can come out of it, and then go from there.
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tanya
New Member
Posts: 45
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
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Post by tanya on Mar 9, 2024 12:51:43 GMT -5
Leave the dev curiosity well alone and get to know her first and once she feels comfortable with you she may open up on that side of her, if indeed she is a dev.
Being a dev is a deeply personal thing for many people and it wouldn't be something I would want brought up before I got to know someone properly and felt easy in their company.
If you like her then get to know her and see where things go if it's reciprocated.
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Post by dannyboy95 on Mar 13, 2024 17:45:21 GMT -5
I'm with the others. Just talk to her normally, make her feel safe and confortable around you. She might open up on her own. But you might then also ask what she things about you being in a wheelchair.
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