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Post by benquad on Apr 14, 2008 11:46:26 GMT -5
Let me first say that I copy & paste this from another thread for those who don't read thru all new posts "I'm not sure if its off topic but id actually prefer a woman to be w/ me in part because my gimpyness,especially if it is a philia w/sexual & sensual aspects! For example, if my girl gives me range of motion, stretching, & massage because she enjoys it not because she feels somehow obligated regardless of "love"  we're much better off no? But then, I'm no relationship expert BY FAR! Pardon my redundancy but I felt the question warranted being posted |
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Post by problemlover on Apr 14, 2008 14:24:14 GMT -5
She might enjoy doing it at first but at least in my experience once my back was killing me,and I developed real feelings for the other person I actually felt bad I thought I'd enjoy something that he needs and not nececeraly enjoys himself.Besides any girl dev or not will learn to deal with everyhting related to your dis as the relationship grows.
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Phil
Junior Member
Posts: 82
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Post by Phil on Apr 16, 2008 14:54:34 GMT -5
Your girl should not be doing your care, IMO.
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Post by benquad on Apr 17, 2008 15:48:39 GMT -5
Your girl should not be doing your care, IMO. I didnt mean "care" I just meant that if a mate is willing & wanting to help w/ aspects of my disability(whichever turn her on) then more power to us! I hate to make it sound like its all about sex, but as I understand it "devs" enjoy something about our disability im just saying I think it helps make everyday things easier |
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Post by Sean on Apr 23, 2008 3:34:42 GMT -5
Here's an other point of view. I'm not a dev. As some of you may know, I have BIID.
My late wife was a para, and had been for 30+ years following a car accident. She knew about my use of, and need for, my wheelchair.
I helped her in many ways. I wasn't doing "care" for her, but I did help her with transfers, massaging swollen legs, etc. It didn't turn me on. It didn't turn me off either. Par for the course. She used to say that she felt my need created a deep understanding in me that allowed me to deal with these "issues" in ways that nobody else she'd ever met could.
My 2 cents.
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Post by dolly on Apr 25, 2008 11:50:45 GMT -5
i wouldn't want to "have to" do those things, benquad. but in a healthy relationship partners care for one another in different ways. i can see that helping you with certain things might be extra enjoyable for both of you if she was a little more "into" it than the average gal.  on the whole i think a balanced dev/wheeler relationship would be a win/win situation for both parties for many reasons. |
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we're much better off no? 
