|
|
Post by BA on Jun 23, 2008 7:36:39 GMT -5
Well, welcome back. Glad you have recovered from the breakup trauma. I am sure the guys on this site will be happy to help you.
|
|
|
|
Post by E on Jun 23, 2008 7:37:04 GMT -5
Smile big. Say hello. Be funny. Be persistent.
Works every time.
|
|
|
|
Post by Triassic on Jun 23, 2008 8:55:54 GMT -5
you know, if you're in an environment where you're seeing disabled men in the course of normality...really it shouldnt be too much of a problem. you may have to make the first move, or at least maybe send a stronger signal of interest than you normally would. also, as e said you may have to be a bit more persistent; because-probably-the 1st thing he'll think is 'well she's just being friendly', whereras an a.b. guy would see that youre interested in hanging out. maybe try to talk to him alone? in a fairly quiet., relaxed place. and don't even worry about the dev stuff. it's not an issue at that point.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 23, 2008 15:32:02 GMT -5
Being yourself is the best advice I can think of. From my experience, you may have to come on a little stronger. I've gotten so used to girls viewing me as a "novelty" that I probably wouldn't know if a woman was interested unless she actually told me she was hitting on me. Some of us aren't always so sure of ourselves in that kind of situation.
|
|
|
|
Post by mrjefffurz on Jun 23, 2008 16:32:38 GMT -5
you indicated that you are in college so that,,,in my peabrain,,,places u in the 20-30 yr old demographic...if you have observed a dude that seems interesting,,,is energetic,,,has people hanging around him,,,there's noise and laffster in the group...and,,,especially,,,if he's hangin out in a club,,,then you may be able to throw out the "she is obviously just being friendly" reaction,,,what i described is a pre-illness version of me in a younger package...with a couple notable exception that threw me for a loop (devgrrlz met b4 i found this site) i was just certain that a woman who showed an interest in me had an interest beyond simple curiosity...and if she interested me chances were good that i would grab the "extended hand" and pull the grrl closer...but from all that i have seen in my 10 yrs interacting online with other crip dudes, i was a very large exception to the norm and you are much more likely to meet buys like the ones who posted ahead of me and the advise thy have given you is dead on for that type of man...and remeber that, above all else, even tho he's a crip dude he IS a man...
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 23, 2008 16:33:50 GMT -5
Go up to the guy. Look him in the eye. And say, want to get a beer? ( or something else thats a no brainer wheelchair friendly activity ).
If he says no, call him a chicken sh*t.
That alone will be viewed as a "challenge"
|
|
|
|
Post by thegoodlife on Jun 23, 2008 18:00:07 GMT -5
Go up to the guy. Look him in the eye. And say, want to get a beer? ( or something else thats a no brainer wheelchair friendly activity ). If he says no, call him a chicken sh*t. That alone will be viewed as a "challenge" hahaha I would totally date and probably make out with any girl that does this to me. hahaha. |
|
|
|
Post by Pony on Jun 23, 2008 19:05:20 GMT -5
well, for me, there has to be some 'chemistry', or some history of interacting...flirtations during these encounters helps to open the door. Forget the BOLD approach at first! Find ways to have conversations.
If this doesn't work, tell him you get extremely wet every time you see him!!! hehe
|
|
|
|
Post by Pony on Jun 23, 2008 19:34:05 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by Triassic on Jun 23, 2008 19:54:52 GMT -5
yeah...there are drawbacks to being too bold. you can wonder if you're being set up for something(i've seen Bladerunner), or even that she might be teasing, fucking w/you, making fun of you....i've had that happen; an attractive chick hit me up as i was leaving a concert by myself, going to my car. she was w/a couple friends and was just coming on SO strong that i got suspicious. in retrospect i think she was probably ok...
|
|
|
|
Post by Ouch on Jun 24, 2008 1:43:48 GMT -5
"...the tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over but it can't; not without your help, but you're not helping..." ...yeah, I know totally off-topic...  Anyway, at first glance I really can't turn my nose up at the strategy mellow provided...that's a pretty awesome way of doing things... ...but in general, I think to echo the sentiment generally shared - it's best to just swoop in, and get to business, which often is probably the hardest part. The 'signals' can be confusing, especially more in our case oftentimes, because there are so many 'uninterested' people that just seem to jump in our paths. ...if you set your sights on someone and are pretty straightforward about your purpose, I think it ends up being a real relieving experience for both of you, and oftentimes a pleasant surprise... |
|
|
|
Post by laurasweetou on Jun 24, 2008 15:11:19 GMT -5
First, welcome back!!! And dont just listen to these guys, ACT upon them. I was very open right awa with my dev status with my guy and he LOVES it!!!!!
|
|
|
|
Post by Triassic on Jun 24, 2008 18:19:26 GMT -5
so wind, would you pass the void-kampf test?
|
|
|
|
Post by Ouch on Jun 24, 2008 18:22:47 GMT -5
Of course! I administer the test, even (and have inspired some people to turn over helpless insects stuck on their backs! ). |
|
|
|
Post by Triassic on Jun 24, 2008 19:39:20 GMT -5
i suspect that you are perhaps a replicant...one who has found a way to beat the test.
|
|
