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Post by Pony on Aug 14, 2008 18:04:01 GMT -5
This thread keeps forcing me to bust out in Alice Cooper's "No More Mr. Nice Guy", and it's starting to get on my nerves. First, people can be disrespectful for no good reason. They just are sometimes. I've been guilty of blowing people off before, but I'll usually call them first. Years ago, there was a girl from work, we used to meet for drinks (when she'd show up). I found myself waiting on her ass three times. Funny thing, she was the one inviting me, but the last time I'd had it. I never saw her again!!
I used to be such a sweet, sweet thing 'Til they got a hold of me. I opened doors for little old ladies, I helped the blind to see. I got no friends 'cause they read the papers. They can't be seen with me and I'm gettin' real shot down And I'm feeling mean.
No more Mister Nice Guy, No more Mister Clean, No more Mister Nice Guy, They say he's sick, he's obscene.
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Post by mrjefffurz on Aug 15, 2008 14:16:26 GMT -5
i heard something on some teevee show yesterday that struck a cord,,,if a person doesnt like you (and extrapolating a little, respect you) for who you are what makes you think they will likw you if you become someone that you arent?
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Post by devogirl on Aug 16, 2008 21:56:14 GMT -5
I think there are two separate issues here:
1. feeling let down by a friend. This happens to everyone. I have had to let several friends go (male and female) because they treated me badly. Sometimes it's about uneven expectations (ie, lack of agreement about the level of closeness or what kinds of demands one could make), sometimes the person just isn't really compatible with you. As with all relationships, sometimes it just doesn't work out, and you have to move on.
2. "Nice Guy" syndrome. This is a totally different problem. Since I don't know you, I can only speak in generalities. Some people are doormats and get taken advantage of. However, in my experience, the kind of guy who complains that "nice guys always finish last" is not really a doormat, in fact, he's not even really nice. Usually it's guys who feel that for some reason (looks, money, dick size, whatever) other guys are scoring with the ladies and they are not. Rather than just being the best they can be in themselves, they become consumed with jealousy, resentment, and rage. They may act soft-spoken and retiring at first, but soon the passive-aggressive, controlling, obsessive behavior comes out, especially with a potential girlfriend. The girl leaves, and he feels his "nice guy" theory is reinforced. But jealousy and passive-aggression aren't really nice, are they? This may not be you at all, by the way, but it's worth mentioning.
Triassic, major props for recognizing that behavior in yourself. It's not an easy thing to do.
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Post by weaponx on Aug 22, 2008 4:06:27 GMT -5
I agree with mrniceguy. People can be really damned disrespectful and just total users. It really doesn't matter if your abled or not though, that's just how some people are and will try to take advantage and use others and sometimes they don't even realize what there doing. At least that's what I've found.
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