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Post by lavly on Jul 21, 2011 4:46:49 GMT -5
ok this is so me ... i go for broken ab's all the time
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Post by Dee Dee on Jul 21, 2011 6:28:47 GMT -5
I do not in the slightest bit feel this way.
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Post by dentelle on Jul 21, 2011 6:29:47 GMT -5
Not me.
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Post by ruthmadison on Jul 21, 2011 7:30:45 GMT -5
Hmmm, I guess when I was a teenager there was some appeal to that where the guy needs me and no one else can "save" him. I grew out of it, realized that people have to deal with their own problems and that being with someone who isn't emotionally stable is a terrible idea and there is no way I can fix them. I think the feelings I used to have for that were not dev feelings, they were more the mother hen instincts.
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Post by Ath on Jul 21, 2011 7:54:56 GMT -5
Yes that is possible. Did you never have 'saving' feelings for disabled men? Not Even as a teen?
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Post by Ath on Jul 21, 2011 7:59:08 GMT -5
I would like to post more but Im At Work typing on this Stupid phone. I think it was a start for Me. I didnt know what i wanted yet, and he was missing 'something', it just wasnt a limb etc.
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Post by ruthmadison on Jul 21, 2011 9:39:16 GMT -5
Yes that is possible. Did you never have 'saving' feelings for disabled men? Not Even as a teen? I'm trying to think back, I don't think I did. For me it's more that I want to be rescued. I want to be protected, cared for, have a guy take control of life and shield me from it. My fantasies as a teen involved an imaginary older disabled man who was a cross between a father figure and a lover in my mind. He was stronger than me, more capable than me.
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Post by Emma on Jul 21, 2011 10:38:43 GMT -5
I have had those feelings for AB guys both as a teen and in my 20s. Like Ruth I realized you can't fix anyone but did date a guy who overcame a lot from a rough childhood and I really admired that about him which was part of my attraction. I guess I have equated those feelings with dev ones in some ways.
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Jul 22, 2011 10:05:28 GMT -5
I've been there too, with more than one AB guy. I'm not sure if it's a dev thing or not - I'm pretty empathetic with everyone, and if I think I can help someone, I'll try my best. Along the lines of what Ruth is saying, I might have a mother hen instinct, but I don't want to be the parent in the relationship either. In my relationships with "broken" AB guys, I was never able to find that balance between helping/fixing/saving while still playing the more traditional female role. It surprises me a little - because that image of the man coming home from a tough day at work to his supportive wife seems to me to be the quintessential traditional female role. I think that has been lost somewhere along the way... or maybe it's just the age group I was dating at the time, I don't know.
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me
New Member
Posts: 20
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Post by me on Jul 22, 2011 16:24:40 GMT -5
I've been attracted to dark and twisted men for as long as I can remember. More than a couple of my exes were unstable and two are now in jail. My first crush was on my friends deaf brother, it was around the time I remember breaking my dolls legs and getting people to pretend to be paralyzed in the roll playing games we played. I like 'different' and would be bored with a nice normal guy
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Post by Dee Dee on Jul 22, 2011 18:10:44 GMT -5
I agree with Z28Gal; it is very difficult to combine the mother hen instinct with a female partner role - I have very strong caring/protecting instincts but I realised a long time ago that I cannot save any man and I am not willing to do so either. A relationship has to be in balance!
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Post by Ath on Jul 24, 2011 2:10:24 GMT -5
I remember breaking my dolls legs and getting people to pretend to be paralyzed in the roll playing games we played. I like 'different' and would be bored with a nice normal guy me too.... I would like to see more discussion on roles and balance aswell.
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Post by faith on Aug 14, 2011 17:23:43 GMT -5
When I was in the 9th grade was very interested in a guy with cerebral palsy. He was funny and had the greatest smile. He was in the special needs class (he attended the one class all day) but we spent time together at lunch. I was fairly popular that year and cute then (not sure what happened!) ... and a year older than he. I was interested in him not to save him or because he needed me, but because I enjoyed being around him and wanted to find out more about him and his disability.
His MOTHER stopped me in the hall one day and, in a nice but firm voice told me to stop "playing" with her son's emotions because all I was going to do was hurt him. I had no intention on hurting him and just wanted to get to know him better. We stopped hanging out together after that.
It was just recently I remembered this incident. I have since tried to find him on Facebook but can't. Just curious how he is doing.
Anyway- thought the whole overprotective mom thing was strange and kind of sad. But... yes, I have had interest in broken guys for a long time. A very long time.
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Aug 14, 2011 20:13:04 GMT -5
Did you throw her off anything?
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