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Post by wheelchairg on Nov 8, 2012 18:52:07 GMT -5
Looking for a nice woman. I don't really know how this works..
So you all tell me, Do I post my email address phone number or what?
I am nice guy, get to know me.
p.s. TG, TV, TS, all are welcome
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Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2012 13:38:10 GMT -5
Welcome to this group!
PD is not actually a dating site but a discussion board where we talk about all kinds of stuff and learning about understanding each other and friendships are formed...
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Post by wheelchairg on Nov 9, 2012 21:00:58 GMT -5
Hello Dani, The more I read around I'm starting to see that. One can hope to get lucky right..
I can always use friends, seems at the moment I have none
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Post by Emma on Nov 9, 2012 22:08:47 GMT -5
I'm glad to hear you are reading the board wheelchairg. That's probably the best way of getting to know the people here because as Dani said its not a dating site (I know the personals sections makes that confusing). Participating in the discussions works well to help others get to know you too.
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Post by wheelchairg on Nov 10, 2012 12:20:06 GMT -5
Hello Emma
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Post by lavly on Nov 11, 2012 14:19:07 GMT -5
Welcome  |
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Post by robbb on Nov 11, 2012 17:22:34 GMT -5
You know, every now and then this 'PD isn't a dating site' statement comes up, always from the ladies I note. Can someone please explain what other use there is for a Personals section because you are quite right Emma, it's very confusing!
R.
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Post by nocturnaldev on Nov 11, 2012 17:49:39 GMT -5
Welcome, Wheelchairg! Looking forward to getting to know another new face! I hope you enjoy our little corner of the world! Robbb, I agree that calling that particular section on the board "Personals" is a bit confusing. However, Dani said it well - this is a message board, and not a dating site. Perhaps we should consider changing it to "Introduce Yourself" (lame, I know) or something similar, as that's really what that section is for. As for it coming from the ladies, it does generally, but this is our place to learn about ourselves and others. While some may be open to a new relationship, some are already in a committed relationship, or are just content to converse and discover, without the "Dating Game" over their head. Anyways, welcome to you too, Robbb, in case I never properly did. I hope you enjoy it here as well! |
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Post by lavly on Nov 11, 2012 18:32:40 GMT -5
i think the reason some of us girl say its not a dating sate is cos we dont want to get anyones hopes up. if i put my self out there and i get no responces i would get a lil upset ... when in reality its just cos the mojority of the women/ men on this board are not looking to hook up for any amount of reasons. also sometimes when we do say hi to a wheeler we are miss understood. our attempts of getting to know someone as mates ends up being more sexual in nature then we would have hoped. ( robb maybe that hasnt happend to you but i know of many of the girls on here who have complained about this very matter). so yeah if we point it out on a post in public then maybe we can be free to be more open and friendly in a persianl email and not have it taken the wrong way. having said that i know so many ppl that have found someone that they dig ... and end up with . so yeah ... you never know  ps i like the " introduce yourself " line ... and its not lame ... it just is what it is pps i spell like shit ... sorry |
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Post by robbb on Nov 12, 2012 6:14:06 GMT -5
Firstly Wheelchairg, apologies that I seem to have hijacked your thread. That wasn't my intention, and for that reason this is the last I will post on this subject.
Let me explain where I am coming from. I'm not new to Paradevo, I have been visiting the site (under various versions of the Rob name due to forgetting passwords) since Lee set it up, and certainly long before the message board was added. Back then it was run by Lee for gay men and women to admire SCI guys and share fiction online, certainly very few wheelers ever ventured in.
The site has developed over the years with the message board probably being the biggest change. I believe the key to it's success has been Lee's willingness to let the site develop as the members wanted it to. My lack of visits these days shows that it now doesn't really offer what I want from it, but as long as it appeals to the majority it will continue to thrive.
My concern is that the board is now largely visited by a group of fairly strong-willed ladies who don't seem to want the site to change because they like what it is already. I recall a chap who posted pictures (all public domain) of attractive paralympians who was run out of town as a result because said ladies didn't like it.
Now I do take the point that saying hi in the Personals section could be wrongly construed as saying 'take me I'm yours' and actually Nocturnaldev makes a great suggestion that a 'Saying Hi' section might be an appropriate addition, but it really does concern me whenever I see the 'Oh no, this site isn't a....' comments. If someone wants to use the site in a certain way, be that admiring photographs or dating, then let them, if others agree they will join in, if not they won't. Only then will the site and board continue to evolve and thrive as they always have.
R.
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Post by lavly on Nov 12, 2012 7:50:03 GMT -5
i see what your saying robb. and i think you make really good points ... and you have won me over. change is not a bad thing.
but again ... stronge will women like my self are alowed to have a say to what we like happen too. just like chaps who post pics. (im still not down with that posting pic thing cos im not sure where the pics are from. i would hate the idea that the pics might be stolen . but thats a side issue. )
and yeah sorry for hijacked your thread ... back to the welcoming thing
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Post by Kid A on Nov 12, 2012 9:38:35 GMT -5
Welcome, Wheelchairg! Looking forward to getting to know another new face! I hope you enjoy our little corner of the world! Robbb, I agree that calling that particular section on the board "Personals" is a bit confusing. However, Dani said it well - this is a message board, and not a dating site. Perhaps we should consider changing it to "Introduce Yourself" (lame, I know) or something similar, as that's really what that section is for. As for it coming from the ladies, it does generally, but this is our place to learn about ourselves and others. While some may be open to a new relationship, some are already in a committed relationship, or are just content to converse and discover, without the "Dating Game" over their head. Anyways, welcome to you too, Robbb, in case I never properly did. I hope you enjoy it here as well! +1. Welcome, WG! |
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Post by devogirl on Nov 12, 2012 9:43:32 GMT -5
Robb, I know you have been a member since the beginning. Lee and I started the site together as a place for devs of disabled men to talk to each other. If over time the message board has been dominated by women, it's because the gay devs have not participated as much in the conversation. I would like to see more contributions from them, but because of big differences between hetero and gay socializing/flirting that may not happen.
Regardless, the reason people are always quick to point out that this is not a dating site is because logistically we are not set up that way. People do hook up here and that's great, but the site can't facilitate those meetings like match.com. Often we have seen guys who make a short first post here then come back a few weeks later angry or hurt that they have no replies, and sometimes turn to attack us devs. By reminding them that most likely they will not get a reply to their post unless they start participating in multiple conversations we are trying to prevent that angry backlash.
The OP here seems to have gotten the message, and does not seem like he was chased off. He asked how the site works and was told in a friendly and welcoming way. By the way, wheelchairg, please do take a look at the sticky post titled "Board Guidelines: New Members Please Read."
The issue with the guy who posted all the photos a few months back had nothing to do with personals, new members, or the site changing. It was not at all clear that those were public domain photos; many of them looked like personal snapshots stolen from private websites, in violation of board guidelines. The poster assumed that we would recognize the guys, but we didn't. I told him he had to make it clear where the photos came from and that they were in the public domain.
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Post by Dee Dee on Nov 12, 2012 18:48:55 GMT -5
Welcome.
May I ask what "TG, TV and TS" are?
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Post by MarineAmp on Nov 13, 2012 0:52:44 GMT -5
Welcome. May I ask what "TG, TV and TS" are? I actually had to stare at that for about 6 seconds before I made a guess that turned out to be correct after I did this. lmgtfy.com/?q=tv+tg+ts%3F |
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