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Post by DrH on Jun 8, 2007 5:29:55 GMT -5
The advice i have given you is very generalized and broad, i am by no means a specialist regarding sci. I do have some knowledge in the field as should most doctors. I however cannot say it is my particular area of interest either.
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Post by Triassic on Jun 8, 2007 10:40:30 GMT -5
A goombah...well, a goombah is the kind of guy who'd make his avatar a bikini chick, thinking that's cool. It's really a kind of rough, loud, not-too-bright, young American guy..
So Dr. H; what IS your interest here? Are you a dev or disabled yourself?
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Post by BA on Jun 8, 2007 21:37:51 GMT -5
So Dr. H; what IS your interest here? Are you a dev or disabled yourself? ditto that
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Post by DrH on Jun 9, 2007 6:59:07 GMT -5
I may relate to some aspects of devoteeism,not entirely though. In medical school I discovered I was attracted to wheelchair users, although not solely. perhaps at this stage i took a keener interest in sci.
I would ever turn this attraction into something realistic, since having had the chance i felt that reality of the situation was not as thrilling as the thought of it, In this sense i don't feel i completely relate to being a 'devotee' since i am not searching for a disabled partner, nor do i feel incomplete or sexually unsatisfied being in a relationship with a physically able person.
I have a disabled colleague, who is an excellent physician and a well rounded person, the aspect of not having full function of her legs doesn't change the fact that she is a very well trained professional with a lot to offer her often insensitive co-workers and ungrateful patients.
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Post by Pony on Jun 9, 2007 12:16:30 GMT -5
You know, that's interesting to me...I've wondered if a chair-doctor might face some prejudice or other 'invisible barriers', even though they have demonstrated full competence and function as normal physicians. I think that chair-doctor guy I met recently is surely to face this, as he looks like a high-quad, and I've been in a chair long enough to feel those 'invisible walls' come up.
Also, I think most of the Devo-girls on here have normal relationships with AB people, but still they hold a special place for this attraction, or fantasy.
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Post by Valkyrja on Jun 9, 2007 17:25:36 GMT -5
That's right. I have normal relationship with my boy (he's an AB man), we have a daughter but I'm still a devotee. And a proud one.
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Post by BA on Jun 9, 2007 17:33:35 GMT -5
And I have a relationship with my husband (who is AB as well) and we also have a daughter. I am not in search of a disabled partner, though I have had some in the past AND Dr. H, in one particular instance, the REALITY did FAR surpass the fantasy. Come on out of that wonderful intellectual halo of defense and join us here on the front lines. I am a well seasoned medical professional myself.
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Post by Ouch on Jun 9, 2007 21:39:20 GMT -5
Seasoned medical professional? Rosemary, Thyme, or Marjoram...?
(yeah that was bad...I'm such a p.w.)
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Post by Valkyrja on Jun 10, 2007 0:46:05 GMT -5
And I have a relationship with my husband (who is AB as well) and we also have a daughter. I am not in search of a disabled partner, though I have had some in the past AND Dr. H, in one particular instance, the REALITY did FAR surpass the fantasy. Come on out of that wonderful intellectual halo of defense and join us here on the front lines. I am a well seasoned medical professional myself. CLAP! CLAP! CLAP!... Bravo!!... AB has spoken with the truth, She is absolutely right (at least for me)
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Post by DrH on Jun 10, 2007 15:35:05 GMT -5
And I have a relationship with my husband (who is AB as well) and we also have a daughter. I am not in search of a disabled partner, though I have had some in the past AND Dr. H, in one particular instance, the REALITY did FAR surpass the fantasy. Come on out of that wonderful intellectual halo of defense and join us here on the front lines. I am a well seasoned medical professional myself. My profession was not in the least a contributing factor to the reality of the situation not meeting my fantasy, I am an average person with the same sexual needs and desires as anyone else. I should rephrase then perhaps, the reality could have come close to the fantasy only on a sexual level, what i hadn't anticipated where the emotional and social factors. I found that the emotional needs of the disabled partner were too demanding for me as an individual therefore deterring me from the sexual aspect, this again is from my own personal experience I apologize for seeming to be generalizing. Again honesty may have not been the best idea here, but I do frequent this board to fuel what is and will stay a fantasy only in my mind, I would like to contribute in the front lines as you put it, I just assumed that if not looking for more than fantasy my contributions would be of little value. Ive met my life partner already, but who knows if i hadn't perhaps id have found that fantasy that became an eventual reality?
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Post by Triassic on Jun 10, 2007 19:53:54 GMT -5
No, I think what you say about the emotional needs/problems of the disabled may well be valid. I recall my own behavior in my early 30's-when I should have been Grown Up; a lot of 'testing', games, and passive-aggression.
I know it was all disability related...
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Post by BA on Jun 10, 2007 19:56:48 GMT -5
I am seasoned with salt, sugar and a bit of cayenne pepper (to taste).
Dr. H., many of the folks on the board have engaged in solely in mental imagery with regard to this whole issue and this is the safe place to do just that. It is very, very difficult to step out of a professional role and "disrobe", so to speak. Since you are a frequent visitor to the board I would imagine that your fantasies are a bit hard to just shake off and walk away from.
What I have meant to say in my prior post is that this is THE place where you can just let it all go and indulge those fantasies without having to stay in any professional role. I wouldn't half a guess at some of the jobs of our members. Many are highly educated and hold positions of considerable power and/or social status. Your contributions, even if "only fantasy" are most welcome and remain anonymous.
I am sorry that your experiences were with disabled individuals who were not in a position emotionally to render the relationship complete and equal on all levels. That does cool off the sexual heat a great deal, if not completely.
I hope you stick with us because it is very nice to know that you are here.
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Post by Pony on Jun 10, 2007 20:21:50 GMT -5
So eloquent and profound...I like the way you write AB!! You missed your calling as a psychologist. Dr H...I, too, hope you stick around!! Uh, just in case I get sick again. hehe I was thinking about your "almost" relationship with chair-person, and every individual is unique, and while I can see how this chair stuff can turn someone needy and emotionally tenderized, I don't carry that kind of baggage at all. I have had AB partners in the past that def carried those traits, which I think in hindsight that was why they were attracted to me - kind of seeking a friend/relation that was as screwed up as them, or desperately needy in ways. I've always wanted an equal partner, not picking them up off the floor all the time. Somebody who understood that I get weak too, at times. I've come close, but usually I'm the one that's stronger...maybe the disability made me this way, not sure really. AB...off subject here!! I'm going to see Brian Johnson (AC/DC) and Joe Lynn Turner (Rainbow/Deep Purple) on July 3rd...I have extra ticket, wanna go? hehe The husband will understand if you tell him I'm PARALYZED!!! lol
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Post by BA on Jun 10, 2007 21:22:03 GMT -5
AB...off subject here!! I'm going to see Brian Johnson (AC/DC) and Joe Lynn Turner (Rainbow/Deep Purple) on July 3rd...I have extra ticket, wanna go? hehe The husband will understand if you tell him I'm PARALYZED!!! lol Tony, guess what? I don't think the husband would mind at all because if I told him you had those tickets HE'D be on the next plane AND he'd be sitting in your lap. On the other hand, if those tickets were for Bauhaus or The Cure, I might take you up on the offer. Do you not yet know about my families divergent musical tastes? All the musicians my husband likes look alive but ARE DEAD. All the musicians I like, are alive, but look quite DEAD.
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Post by Ouch on Jun 10, 2007 22:20:28 GMT -5
A Jim Morrison fellow is he...? (or perhaps Jerry Garcia...)
...Tony, I can put on a wig and dress like those 'ladies' you 'dig', if you'd give me the ticket lol...I need to make a reconnaissance trip to FL anyway before my move.
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