There is a medical drug for devness and I was on it

[Nia]

My felow devs most of you who knows me know that I dont’t post a lot and that im more of a lurker, someone who doesent feel like I fit here very of often but at the end of the story you are my only comunity I have…
Long story short.
I’ve been strugling with a massive depresive episode for over 9 months now. Ive changed my therapist and so far she sheems to be the best for me because I somehow managed to tell her ALL. I don’t hide anything from her. When I came to her in december 2020 I was a wrack with millions of obsessive thoughts that made me literally not able to function on a daily basis. It was a mishap of all my attraction to amputees, my BiiD thoughts, my body dysmorphic episodes directed to me etc etc. so she gave me s cocktail made of 2 antidepressants and one anxiolytics. Things weren’t better for me so she made a decision to put me on Risar I don’t know the name in another countries but it’s a medicine for schizophrenics which Im definitely not but also for ppl with extreme obsessive ocd thoughts. To my surprise she put me on a maximum dose that left me totally blank after only a couple of weeks after. Blank meaning I was still a dev but just like that I knew I was a dev but non of what makes me dev disappeared. I felt like half of what I am disappeared and after talking to her she again changed my therapy now without Risar….. so for any one of you who is sick of everything there is a magic pill…. U take it and devnes becomes some old part of you you hardly remember ever pushed you do anything… I hated that. I just want my control back but being a dev is who I am. I was also totally uninterested in sex. Im now going back switching medicines again hoping to cure my enormous depresive episode… I’ll let you know how I am. And please don’t take risar. We are who we are it’s sometimes overwhelming but it’s wonderful….

[ayla]

My heart goes out to you dealing with this depressive episode. That’s an enormous challenge and I wish you strength and energy to keep tackling it! Personally, I’ve been on medications (and in situations) in the past that diminished the devness— but just as you experienced, it was always at the cost of my sex drive. I think you’re right to accept that you can’t have a libido without your devness, because they are one and the same. I hope you are eventually able to find that middle path where you can experience the positive parts of your sexuality without being troubled by obsessive thinking.

[Kahanah]

I had the same on birth control. No desire whatsoever. Worst 2 months of our relationship. I legit hated him. LOL