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Post by Inigo Montoya on May 20, 2011 22:12:10 GMT -5
That is all.
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Post by dentelle on May 20, 2011 23:22:39 GMT -5
I hear ya
Try the size of poppy seeds
I have to stop the date with the guy. He was putting too much pressure on me. It's really upset my stomache. I really am not feeling good now. Honestly... Men
My daughter has it and she's only 18. She came to me a few months ago. Actually it was before she turned 18. She said. 'Mom, I just can't see Max anymore. He gets bored playing with video games and he wants to make out. I can't see him tonight. I don't want to make out for 4 hours. It's boring.'
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Post by dolly on May 21, 2011 0:06:53 GMT -5
Perhaps only peanuts. I'm afraid, deep down, I really am a man hater. I don't want to be. But I think I don't like them and I know they don't like me.  sorry about the guy, dentelle. men.  lol |
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Post by ruthmadison on May 21, 2011 12:13:29 GMT -5
I don't think so. I like men.
I just wish that I could have clearer communication with the ones I go on dates with.
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Post by dentelle on May 21, 2011 15:48:39 GMT -5
I'm now feeling guilty. I told the guy I couldn't make it into Montreal because the alternator on my car went kaput. Not true. I was in a dollar store with a friend of mine. I showed her his profile and she said he was a Beau bon homme. A very nice looking guy. Yeah, but gee. Oh well, going out with someone else who hasn't put pressure on me to hop into bed or make out in public! He helped me to choose a weed-wacker last night. He is divorced from his wife, but he still stays with her to take care of her. She has MS and hasn't gotten out of the house for the past few years. She's totally bed ridden  I now remember why I crossed young men off my list of dates. Sigh. |
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jun 2, 2011 7:35:24 GMT -5
Back for my friend who needs it right now. Because sometimes... they really do suck. |
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Post by BA on Jun 2, 2011 9:12:48 GMT -5
I agree Lucretia and think quite a bit of the way some men act has much to do with self protection and possibly for good reasons. However, it just makes them that much more difficult to get to know, to be around and to trust. Some guys do more testing and pushing away than is ever called for. I think in the case of us as devs, we tend to cut a bit more slack to our guys and sometimes I think it is to our detriment. I had a great conversation last night about this very subject with a wheeler from this board and his insight was appreciated. I specifically asked why it was that some dis guys appear to not fully grow up in terms of certain aspects of life. He shed some light on this by reminding me of just how different and "child-like" so many wheelers are treated out there in the community. No longer held accountable for things they would have been if not disabled. This attitude is more prevalent than I would care to admit and it has colored my perception of disabled men which makes me very sad.
So, what to do about this?
My negative expectation certainly does NOT help my situation and I need to just stop the single brush painting. Not at all.
I like men, very much. I have just not had particularly great experiences with those of the wheeled persuasion.
What do y'all think?
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jun 2, 2011 9:41:42 GMT -5
I've not had particularly great experiences with men wheeled OR walking. lol From the time puberty hit it's been pretty much sh*t. How much this is my own damn fault... who the hell knows? (Where's coffeeftw?  ) I agree with everything you said... but I'm leaving it as "Men suck." If the guys are really doing what the should, i.e. not reading here, then their feelings won't be hurt. If they are then they're free to start a "Women suck" thread out in general. God knows plenty of Devs Only stuff winds up out there, anyway. And besides sometimes we suck, too. God knows the common denominator in ALL my relating suckage is me. I'm VERY well aware of it. And my negative expectation definitely does NOT help my situation AT ALL. I'm INCREDIBLY easy to reject.  Besides... "My negative expectation certainly does NOT help my situation and I need to just stop the single brush painting. Not at all. I like men, very much. I have just not had particularly great experiences with those of the wheeled persuasion. " Doesn't fit in the title slot. =/ |
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jun 2, 2011 9:43:08 GMT -5
There... modified it. Better, I hope. More benign, right? One of my co-workers hates that the kids say "this sucks" or "that sucks" so he insists that they use vacuums.
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Jun 2, 2011 10:04:41 GMT -5
Imma say too, since I'm belaboring it, that this thread was started more than a little tongue in cheek. I was talking with ONE other member here... a female... and we were bemoaning stuff (obviously). Yeah, I was in a heightened emotional state or I wouldn't have had such a ridiculous cow and taken it down in a childish fit. But that was all. It was a "heh" for us.
I deleted the rest of my rant here... I need to turn off KOL's Radioactive... I really think it's not doing anyone any good... =/
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Post by dentelle on Jun 2, 2011 10:26:19 GMT -5
Huggggggggs Inigo  Yeah, I had an english teacher in college. She actually did a 30 minute lecture on the word 'sucks' which also included 'rap' and 'crap'. She was an interesting old bird, the things that woman would come out with. The nicest woman in the world though, very eccentric. If I saw her today, I'd tell her to exchange the word for vaccuum After we passed her class she told us we were all English Specialists. Georgette Card, English specialist. |
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Post by Dee Dee on Jun 2, 2011 11:22:30 GMT -5
I agree Lucretia and think quite a bit of the way some men act has much to do with self protection and possibly for good reasons. However, it just makes them that much more difficult to get to know, to be around and to trust. Some guys do more testing and pushing away than is ever called for. I think in the case of us as devs, we tend to cut a bit more slack to our guys and sometimes I think it is to our detriment. I had a great conversation last night about this very subject with a wheeler from this board and his insight was appreciated. I specifically asked why it was that some dis guys appear to not fully grow up in terms of certain aspects of life. He shed some light on this by reminding me of just how different and "child-like" so many wheelers are treated out there in the community. No longer held accountable for things they would have been if not disabled. This attitude is more prevalent than I would care to admit and it has colored my perception of disabled men which makes me very sad. What do y'all think? I have had the same experiences with the wheeled versions of men and I agree about the "not-fully-grown-up" part for some of them. Possibly because they tend to be treated more child-like and in the end get used to that and therefore have difficulties taking responsibility. However; this certainly does not apply to all of them, but definitely to some  . I DO think we as devotees tend to cut wheelers some more slack. I know that I have and I regret that a lot  . |
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Post by ruthmadison on Jun 2, 2011 11:31:31 GMT -5
My mom HATES the expression "sucks." I think she finds it gross. I always have to remember not to say it around her. Well, in balance, I have to say that I had a fantastic date last night and I'm seeing him again tomorrow  Keep hope alive! |
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Post by dentelle on Jun 2, 2011 11:43:03 GMT -5
Hello DeeDee
It's not just the wheelers. I went out with a guy with CP. He could pull the biggest suck you'd never want to see. I think his parents babied him too much. He was their only child. It had to go all his way. I finally had the 'It's all about me' attitude and got rid of him. And by the way 'We were together in a past life' doesn't work on me. I guess he could blow too!
To tell you the truth, AB, CP, Wheelers, there is one in every bunch. I'm just glad it's us who bear the children....
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Jun 2, 2011 12:50:58 GMT -5
Well, in balance, I have to say that I had a fantastic date last night and I'm seeing him again tomorrow Keep hope alive! YAY Ruth!!! So excited for you!! ;D Back to the original topic... I've seen that immaturity in both AB guys and wheelers, and it's incredibly frustrating. I can't speak to wheeler-specific childishness, but I was in two long term relationships with immature AB guys. I'm TIRED of being the parent in the relationship! I want to be the one wearing the skirt!! I'm sick of always being the rational one because they're constantly throwing hissy fits over ridiculous things. I understand insecurities (hell, everybody has them), but for Christ's sake, man up and deal with them instead of punishing me for your issues. I'm over putting up with that kind of crap. I think my personality might exacerbate things too, but what am I supposed to do about that? Apologize for having my sh*t together? Ok, rant over. After a sum total of 6 years of dating immature guys, I may *possibly* be just a *bit* jaded. |
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Keep hope alive!