GAYS Unite

[mili]

Oct 26, 2020 16:33:19 GMT -5 shadow said:

Oct 26, 2020 15:16:50 GMT -5 mili said:

I totally agree and never condone the condemning of any person based on a singular title (with some exceptions to the rule of course). I also have absolutely no problem with pretending that is being done in the privacy of one’s own home. But, the post he was specifically quoting was someone who admittedly is a wannabe/pretender and owns a variety of equipment meant for people with disabilities specifically for the purpose pretending in public. My experience with wannabes and pretenders is that being seen as disabled is just as big of a desire as using the equipment.  This very fact offends some pwds, and I support their every right to be offended by it without putting the other person’s personal needs and feelings ahead of theirs. It may not seem harmful on the outside, but I can see the argument that it is still harmful even if “no one knows.” 

I don’t want to compare biid or devoteeism to other things (because I also know this is not your argument), but there are a lot of disorders that people have that are legitimate and may be excruciatingly difficult for the people to deal with that we do not condone their actions for relief. Just because someone has a legitimate mental disorder does not give free reign to act on those desires or needs. Some are flat out illegal and others are still considered socially unacceptable. The presence of a diagnosable medical or mental “condition” should not override that, IMO. As society changes, so will the acceptance of certain behaviors. I actually see trend that transabled people will push for acceptance but I think it will take a while for the disabled community to get on board with it, which I think should be required for it to gain social acceptance. If all of the disabled community agrees “no harm” comes from pretending, I will probably also join that opinion. I see the transracial community experiencing A similar struggle to gain acceptance for their condition as well. Legitimate disorder? Sure. Is the black community ready to accept a Caucasian wearing dreads as a black person because they identify as transracial? Probably not. Do they really know what it’s like to be a black person even if they have felt that way since they could remember? If not, should they get to present themselves as such? I see the harm of a person with BIID pretending in public the same as this. 

Ok, thanks for explaining. People can be offended, and I simply see it differently. People who are transgender have the same issue—they feel as if they were born into the wrong body and want to be seen as the gender they feel represents them best. Otherwise, they suffer greatly. They have found correlations between structural differences in the brain in those who are transgender, and those who have BIID. For me, I find that there is less support and understanding for disorders that are not visible or are mental-health related, and I empathize with those who suffer from these things.

but there are a lot of disorders that people have that are legitimate and may be excruciatingly difficult for the people to deal with that we do not condone their actions for relief. Just because someone has a legitimate mental disorder does not give free reign to act on those desires or needs. Some are flat out illegal and others are still considered socially unacceptable. The presence of a diagnosable medical or mental “condition” should not override that, IMO. As society changes, so will the acceptance of certain behaviors. I actually see trend that transabled people will push for acceptance but I think it will take a while for the disabled community to get on board with it, which I think should be required for it to gain social acceptance.

I agree that there are legitimate disorders that cause someone to act in certain ways that we do not condone, and within reason, I don't think that someone walking with crutches because it makes them feel whole is one of those things. If a biological man feels that he is a woman, I don't think he needs to gain acceptance from women to become one and live out her right to be happy and feel whole with this anomaly that she simply did not choose. As for being transracial, this is definitely a tricky one and even more rare than BIID (with literally a handful of popular cases) and the function of the behavior has not been studied, it seems. From what I've read about this, the etiology seems to be different than BIID—people aren't born needing to be a different race and this phenomenon probably is secondary cause of other mental health issues, which means that the primary cause should be addressed (i.e. trauma, self-esteem).

[mili]

Oct 28, 2020 0:10:27 GMT -5 kro354 said:

I feel like this thread has taken a sharp turn toward something that has nothing to do with gays....the topic of BIID is valid but an ongoing discussion of it would be better on a separate thread. For those of us looking to this thread in the hopes of connecting gay devs and PWDs, and discussing things related to being a part of our little minority of a minority, I'm sad to see this thread get so heated and disrespectful (we are insulting millennials and boomers now? C'mon...) and not even about a subject that is specific to gay men!
--My $0.02

Just saw this. Sorry, no more BIID talk from me. Keep on uniting! 

[dannyboy95]

Nov 10, 2020 7:48:08 GMT -5 @spiritedaway said:

Hey gays, how are we doing?

Pretty fine man. And yourself? :-)

[Jay]

Does 'working from home' count as doing anything?

[emgall]

Nov 10, 2020 7:48:08 GMT -5 @spiritedaway said:

Hey gays, how are we doing?

Fine! Where are you from?

[kro354]

I'm healthy and have a job, which in 2020 is enough to count as success. As a single guy who lives alone, I do miss going to bars, house parties, and other places where you can connect with friends and make new ones.  I recently got my own apartment and was planning to host social gatherings, but then covid hit. It's funny, because I've heard people in the past predict the end of gay bars because hookup apps are allowing people to skip going out to find other gays. But I always thought that there's value in seeing people in person (or to check out random guys knowing that there's a chance they might actually be into you).

Social distancing is easier in suburbs/rural areas where you can meet in the yard and physically spread out. Not so easy here in the city.

[kro354]

Yes I stopped by Boystown (Chicago) where an impromptu street party broke out on Saturday to celebrate Biden's win. I'd share a picture here but I cant figure out how to attach a photo.

[kyurem646]

Hi everyone, I'm a 23 year old devotee living in Southern California! I'm finally ready to stop lurking and join in on the fun

[Deleted]

I'm posting this so that I am finally at 10 posts and I understand I can finally do messaging. Liberation!

[anish124]

Jun 9, 2013 10:21:39 GMT -5 smaragdd said:

I m here. Quad wheeler

Hi there... Anish here im a devotee would you like to connect

[anish124]

Jun 17, 2013 0:52:01 GMT -5 gaywheellover said:

Here, gay, a wheeler, and a dev.

Jay

Hi there... Anish here im a devotee would you like to connect

[anish124]

Jul 7, 2013 8:03:57 GMT -5 hughrif said:

I don't understand how guys express interest and then disappear......

Hi there... Anish here im a devotee would you like to connect

[anish124]

Jul 7, 2013 13:48:20 GMT -5 wheels2enjoylife said:

Hello, I am new here. I am a bisexual quad… I just enjoy sex and pleasing both men and women. I have full feeling throughout my body and am sexually fully functional. I live in Long Island New York

Hi there... Anish here im a devotee would you like to connect

[anish124]

Jul 28, 2013 4:48:52 GMT -5 sciguyeu said:

Gay in Manchester, C6 spinal injured. Anyone planning a visit this way?

Hi there... Anish here im a devotee would you like to connect

[devogirl]

anish124 please do not post the same message multiple times. If you want to contact someone, you can send a personal message. Also note the date of these posts. If someone posted seven years ago, it is unlikely they will respond to you.