sciguyeu
Full Member
I have a massive thing for gay or bi male devotees. Straight and curious welcome too.
Posts: 110
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Post by sciguyeu on Oct 16, 2020 9:14:33 GMT -5
Hi there. I'm a quad guy with a genuine thing for dev guys. 50, gay, Manchester UK
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sciguyeu
Full Member
I have a massive thing for gay or bi male devotees. Straight and curious welcome too.
Posts: 110
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Post by sciguyeu on Oct 16, 2020 9:16:42 GMT -5
Greetings from Chicago! Gay dev here, generally into quads and other guys with similar level disability (DMD, ALS, etc.) Never really expressed this attraction publically before but I'm glad to have found this site and open to chatting with anyone who wants to say hello! Hope everyone is staying sane and healthy in this endless pandemic... Hi. You are a handsome man. Gay quad guy here with a genuine thing for dev men |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Oct 17, 2020 13:53:10 GMT -5
Hi everybody:,, very open
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Post by youngquad on Oct 25, 2020 8:38:54 GMT -5
Hi, gay amputee wannabe/devotee/pretender here. I have a TiLte ZRA titanium chair, forearm crutches, and a special made carbon fiber arm hook prosthesis that I wear for pretending in public. Im very extroverted, bright, and easy to know. :-) Alex I can honest say I don’t understand people like you that pretend I would do anything to back to the way I was but you want to pretend what a load of bolox |
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Post by youngquad on Oct 26, 2020 10:54:07 GMT -5
I can honest say I don’t understand people like you that pretend I would do anything to back to the way I was but you want to pretend what a load of bolox A couple of things yq... That line you quoted is 7 years old so I don't imagine 1lib is going to see your reply. While I absolutely accept that from your point of view pretenders are abhorrent you could make your argument with a little less aggression. Cheers, R. I was not aggressive at all infant I thought I put it a lot nicer than I should off, didn’t realise that it was old but my opinion still stands |
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mili
Full Member
Posts: 131
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by mili on Oct 26, 2020 12:46:56 GMT -5
A couple of things yq... That line you quoted is 7 years old so I don't imagine 1lib is going to see your reply. While I absolutely accept that from your point of view pretenders are abhorrent you could make your argument with a little less aggression. Cheers, R. I was not aggressive at all infant I thought I put it a lot nicer than I should off, didn’t realise that it was old but my opinion still stands I'm always interested about this aversion. I like to take the empathic route that looks beyond ones-self, understanding that people with BIID did not choose this disorder, just like you did not choose your disability, and just like I did not choose to be a dev. Presenting another viewpoint and not looking to argue about it. |
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Post by shadow on Oct 26, 2020 13:46:41 GMT -5
I was not aggressive at all infant I thought I put it a lot nicer than I should off, didn’t realise that it was old but my opinion still stands I'm always interested about this aversion. I like to take the empathic route that looks beyond ones-self, understanding that people with BIID did not choose this disorder, just like you did not choose your disability, and just like I did not choose to be a dev. Presenting another viewpoint and not looking to argue about it. It’s true that people with BIID do not choose their disorder, but what we do in our actions is something we do have control over. Most people’s aversion is not to the disorder itself, it’s to the pretending and other actions some people with BIID partake in that they oppose. I feel like I have a pretty open mind about BIID and I agree completely with your view point. But, I don’t think able bodied people can possibly have the same perspective as a pwd on this subject. |
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mili
Full Member
Posts: 131
Gender: Female
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by mili on Oct 26, 2020 15:16:50 GMT -5
I'm always interested about this aversion. I like to take the empathic route that looks beyond ones-self, understanding that people with BIID did not choose this disorder, just like you did not choose your disability, and just like I did not choose to be a dev. Presenting another viewpoint and not looking to argue about it. It’s true that people with BIID do not choose their disorder, but what we do in our actions is something we do have control over. Most people’s aversion is not to the disorder itself, it’s to the pretending and other actions some people with BIID partake in that they oppose. I feel like I have a pretty open mind about BIID and I agree completely with your view point. But, I don’t think able bodied people can possibly have the same perspective as a pwd on this subject. I can't have the same perspective since I don't have a (visible) disability, and I can imagine that pretenders could bring up certain emotions for pwd—still, I advocate for the empathic stance. From my perspective, pretending probably provides some relief and sense of wholeness for someone with BIID, and doesn't really harm anyone when done respectfully. I recognize that there are those that really "fool" other people and trust me, I have met a fair share pretenders on apps that take on the identity of other people. This is unethical and something I don't stand by. But just as devs shouldn't all be defined by the creepers, not everyone with BIID should be condemned by the "bad" few. I'm not saying this is what you were arguing, I'm just elaborating.  |
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Post by shadow on Oct 26, 2020 16:33:19 GMT -5
It’s true that people with BIID do not choose their disorder, but what we do in our actions is something we do have control over. Most people’s aversion is not to the disorder itself, it’s to the pretending and other actions some people with BIID partake in that they oppose. I feel like I have a pretty open mind about BIID and I agree completely with your view point. But, I don’t think able bodied people can possibly have the same perspective as a pwd on this subject. I can't have the same perspective since I don't have a (visible) disability, and I can imagine that pretenders could bring up certain emotions for pwd—still, I advocate for the empathic stance. From my perspective, pretending probably provides some relief and sense of wholeness for someone with BIID, and doesn't really harm anyone when done respectfully. I recognize that there are those that really "fool" other people and trust me, I have met a fair share pretenders on apps that take on the identity of other people. This is unethical and something I don't stand by. But just as devs shouldn't all be defined by the creepers, not everyone with BIID should be condemned by the "bad" few. I'm not saying this is what you were arguing, I'm just elaborating. I totally agree and never condone the condemning of any person based on a singular title (with some exceptions to the rule of course). I also have absolutely no problem with pretending that is being done in the privacy of one’s own home. But, the post he was specifically quoting was someone who admittedly is a wannabe/pretender and owns a variety of equipment meant for people with disabilities specifically for the purpose pretending in public. My experience with wannabes and pretenders is that being seen as disabled is just as big of a desire as using the equipment. This very fact offends some pwds, and I support their every right to be offended by it without putting the other person’s personal needs and feelings ahead of theirs. It may not seem harmful on the outside, but I can see the argument that it is still harmful even if “no one knows.” I don’t want to compare biid or devoteeism to other things (because I also know this is not your argument), but there are a lot of disorders that people have that are legitimate and may be excruciatingly difficult for the people to deal with that we do not condone their actions for relief. Just because someone has a legitimate mental disorder does not give free reign to act on those desires or needs. Some are flat out illegal and others are still considered socially unacceptable. The presence of a diagnosable medical or mental “condition” should not override that, IMO. As society changes, so will the acceptance of certain behaviors. I actually see trend that transabled people will push for acceptance but I think it will take a while for the disabled community to get on board with it, which I think should be required for it to gain social acceptance. If all of the disabled community agrees “no harm” comes from pretending, I will probably also join that opinion. I see the transracial community experiencing A similar struggle to gain acceptance for their condition as well. Legitimate disorder? Sure. Is the black community ready to accept a Caucasian wearing dreads as a black person because they identify as transracial? Probably not. Do they really know what it’s like to be a black person even if they have felt that way since they could remember? If not, should they get to present themselves as such? I see the harm of a person with BIID pretending in public the same as this. |
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GAYS Unite
Oct 26, 2020 16:45:30 GMT -5
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Post by youngquad on Oct 26, 2020 16:45:30 GMT -5
I can't have the same perspective since I don't have a (visible) disability, and I can imagine that pretenders could bring up certain emotions for pwd—still, I advocate for the empathic stance. From my perspective, pretending probably provides some relief and sense of wholeness for someone with BIID, and doesn't really harm anyone when done respectfully. I recognize that there are those that really "fool" other people and trust me, I have met a fair share pretenders on apps that take on the identity of other people. This is unethical and something I don't stand by. But just as devs shouldn't all be defined by the creepers, not everyone with BIID should be condemned by the "bad" few. I'm not saying this is what you were arguing, I'm just elaborating. I totally agree and never condone the condemning of any person based on a singular title (with some exceptions to the rule of course). I also have absolutely no problem with pretending that is being done in the privacy of one’s own home. But, the post he was specifically quoting was someone who admittedly is a wannabe/pretender and owns a variety of equipment meant for people with disabilities specifically for the purpose pretending in public. My experience with wannabes and pretenders is that being seen as disabled is just as big of a desire as using the equipment. This very fact offends some pwds, and I support their every right to be offended by it without putting the other person’s personal needs and feelings ahead of theirs. It may not seem harmful on the outside, but I can see the argument that it is still harmful even if “no one knows.” I don’t want to compare biid or devoteeism to other things (because I also know this is not your argument), but there are a lot of disorders that people have that are legitimate and may be excruciatingly difficult for the people to deal with that we do not condone their actions for relief. Just because someone has a legitimate mental disorder does not give free reign to act on those desires or needs. Some are flat out illegal and others are still considered socially unacceptable. The presence of a diagnosable medical or mental “condition” should not override that, IMO. As society changes, so will the acceptance of certain behaviors. I actually see trend that transabled people will push for acceptance but I think it will take a while for the disabled community to get on board with it, which I think should be required for it to gain social acceptance. If all of the disabled community agrees “no harm” comes from pretending, I will probably also join that opinion. I see the transracial community experiencing A similar struggle to gain acceptance for their condition as well. Legitimate disorder? Sure. Is the black community ready to accept a Caucasian wearing dreads as a black person because they identify as transracial? Probably not. Do they really know what it’s like to be a black person even if they have felt that way since they could remember? If not, should they get to present themselves as such? I see the harm of a person with BIID pretending in public the same as this. Thankyou someone who understands |
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GAYS Unite
Oct 26, 2020 19:14:59 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by someonerandom on Oct 26, 2020 19:14:59 GMT -5
I was not aggressive at all infant I thought I put it a lot nicer than I should off, didn’t realise that it was old but my opinion still stands I'm going to assume that "infant" is a typo for in fact and not an attempt at a patronizing insult. I am very aware that your "opinion still stands" that is why I said "I absolutely accept that from your point...". To refer to something as a "load of bollox" (bollocks) is mildly aggressive towards the person you were directing it to and is not necessary or appropriate in this setting. It is established that the millennial generation struggles to accept differences of opinion without lashing out at the opposing view, and I again absolutely accept your point of view of the subject as being unacceptable, but this is a public discussion forum and for many members their only safe place to have such discussions. Public debate involves respecting other points of view even if you don't agree with them. R. Bollocks? Come on, that’s not aggressive. Harry Potter says that shit! I have no doubt that, as a boomer, you are able to accept my opinion without being offended. |
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Post by youngquad on Oct 27, 2020 2:32:26 GMT -5
I'm going to assume that "infant" is a typo for in fact and not an attempt at a patronizing insult. I am very aware that your "opinion still stands" that is why I said "I absolutely accept that from your point...". To refer to something as a "load of bollox" (bollocks) is mildly aggressive towards the person you were directing it to and is not necessary or appropriate in this setting. It is established that the millennial generation struggles to accept differences of opinion without lashing out at the opposing view, and I again absolutely accept your point of view of the subject as being unacceptable, but this is a public discussion forum and for many members their only safe place to have such discussions. Public debate involves respecting other points of view even if you don't agree with them. R. Bollocks? Come on, that’s not aggressive. Harry Potter says that shit! I have no doubt that, as a boomer, you are able to accept my opinion without being offended. It was supposed to say infact and while that is your opinion it was aggressive there are lots of words words I could have used which would have sounded aggressive. Also I completely disagree with you my generation is the most open minded we are the ones changing the way people can identify themselves so I don’t see how you came to your conclusion. And about respect I will not respect someone that says they are a pretender and have all the equipment which someone much more deserving could be using, and the fact that they can go for a run whenever they like annoys me even more having a disability isn’t fun whatsoever |
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Post by someonerandom on Oct 27, 2020 8:24:47 GMT -5
Bollocks? Come on, that’s not aggressive. Harry Potter says that shit! I have no doubt that, as a boomer, you are able to accept my opinion without being offended. It's not about the words used, it's about the intent with which it was aimed at the person it was said to. His attitude was I don't agree therefore you are wrong. R. Fine, I just don’t think you need to be so sensitive about it. And the intent behind your words on millennials was a bit disrespectful as well. youngquad Think you quoted the wrong person there. |
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Post by youngquad on Oct 27, 2020 9:02:01 GMT -5
It's not about the words used, it's about the intent with which it was aimed at the person it was said to. His attitude was I don't agree therefore you are wrong. R. Fine, I just don’t think you need to be so sensitive about it. And the intent behind your words on millennials was a bit disrespectful as well. youngquad Think you quoted the wrong person there. Yeah just realised lol |
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kro354
Full Member
Posts: 146
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Devotee
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by kro354 on Oct 28, 2020 0:10:27 GMT -5
I feel like this thread has taken a sharp turn toward something that has nothing to do with gays....the topic of BIID is valid but an ongoing discussion of it would be better on a separate thread. For those of us looking to this thread in the hopes of connecting gay devs and PWDs, and discussing things related to being a part of our little minority of a minority, I'm sad to see this thread get so heated and disrespectful (we are insulting millennials and boomers now? C'mon...) and not even about a subject that is specific to gay men!
--My $0.02
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