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Post by devogirl on Mar 5, 2014 7:12:59 GMT -5
Blindsim is hot! No need to apologize, I totally get that. Only in private though. I tried to convince a few guys in the past to try it with me but they were not as into it as I was, oh well. There used to be a Yahoo group for blindsim a long time ago but it got flooded with spam, unfortunately.
Anyway in case it wasn't clear enough from previous posts, BIID and pretending are not at all the same. BIID is a brain mapping disorder, while pretending is a fetish.
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Post by tori on Mar 5, 2014 15:28:37 GMT -5
Absolutely, yes, I'd agree it's a fetish. My husband calls it my "kink" which he thinks is sexy. Took me YEARS to finally tell him but when I did I think he was relieved he could find something that gets my motor running. Sex has been better in the past few years because of it. Pretending is just fun and something that him and I enjoy together. I feel as long as you are not hurting anyone, exploiting someone, or taking resources away from someone with a real disability that what you do sexually is your own business.
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stiffl3g
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Post by stiffl3g on Mar 5, 2014 16:43:27 GMT -5
Absolutely, yes, I'd agree it's a fetish. For people who really suffer from BIID this is not a fetish, it is much more. Sexuality is part of BIID, but if sexual aspects is the main motor that drives one, the diagnosis BIID may be questionable. BIID is an identity issue in the fist place, not a fetish.
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Post by tori on Mar 6, 2014 10:46:02 GMT -5
Absolutely, yes, I'd agree it's a fetish. For people who really suffer from BIID this is not a fetish, it is much more. Sexuality is part of BIID, but if sexual aspects is the main motor that drives one, the diagnosis BIID may be questionable. BIID is an identity issue in the fist place, not a fetish. I was speaking specifically about pretenders, not those with BIID. BIID in my opinion is not a fetish, pretending can be part of BIID, but I think for "pretenders" that do not suffer from BIID THEN it is a fetish. I think most people on this thread would agree. Sorry, had to clarify that.
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stiffl3g
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Post by stiffl3g on Mar 6, 2014 13:52:03 GMT -5
I was speaking specifically about pretenders, not those with BIID. BIID in my opinion is not a fetish, pretending can be part of BIID, but I think for "pretenders" that do not suffer from BIID THEN it is a fetish. I think most people on this thread would agree. Sorry, had to clarify that. Ah, okay, thank you. Maybe I did not correctly understand. Indeed, BIId is more than a fetish, there is a sexual aspect in BIID, even a strong one in many cases, but it is more than a sexual issue. I think it really can be compared with transsexuality, it just affect the limbs and not sexual organs. best regards m
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g
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Post by g on Mar 6, 2014 14:58:48 GMT -5
I saw it brought up in another thread and I was just wondering everyone's feelings on it. Let's try and be respectful. I don't want to be the new girl, causing fights. To each their own.
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Post by luvonwheelz on Mar 6, 2014 15:23:49 GMT -5
I was speaking specifically about pretenders, not those with BIID. BIID in my opinion is not a fetish, pretending can be part of BIID, but I think for "pretenders" that do not suffer from BIID THEN it is a fetish. I think most people on this thread would agree. Sorry, had to clarify that. Ah, okay, thank you. Maybe I did not correctly understand. Indeed, BIId is more than a fetish, there is a sexual aspect in BIID, even a strong one in many cases, but it is more than a sexual issue. I think it really can be compared with transsexuality, it just affect the limbs and not sexual organs. best regards m Please stop comparing BIID and transsexuality. One is a mental illness that can be treated and the other is not. Comparing then is extremely offensive and makes you sound incredibly uneducated.
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stiffl3g
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Post by stiffl3g on Mar 7, 2014 21:49:09 GMT -5
Please stop comparing BIID and transsexuality. There is virtually no serious BIID researcher who does not compare BIID with transsexuality, including Prof. First. It is safe to assume, Prof. First knows what he talks about.
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Post by luvonwheelz on Mar 7, 2014 22:19:59 GMT -5
If they were in the same category, you could go to the doctor, and after going through processes, you could go get your leg cut off and or your spine severed. Yes they have similarities, but can not be considered the same.
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Post by luvonwheelz on Mar 8, 2014 0:19:55 GMT -5
Transexualism is physiological and BIID is psychological which is why one can be treated and the other not. I have very close friends who are transexual, close enough that I consider them family. I'm not trying to come across angry or indignant, it's just something that I've been around and feel compelled to speak about.
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Post by devogirl on Mar 8, 2014 1:06:20 GMT -5
Transexualism is physiological and BIID is psychological which is why one can be treated and the other not. What is your evidence that BIID is psychological and can be treated with psychotherapy? Everything that I have seen online has said the opposite. It's a brain mapping disorder. People with BIID who have achieved the disability their brain requires report feeling relief. There is no other treatment, unfortunately. Usually the person desires one very specific disability: amputation of a specific limb at a specific place, SCI at a certain level. Again, I recommend you look at the links I posted earlier. Here is one: www.experienceproject.com/stories/Have-Body-Integrity-Identity-Disorder/1531938He talks about how all forms of therapy failed. And the other: www.squidoo.com/transabledQuoting from that site: "There is currently no known treatment for BIID." You assume that asserting these conditions of BIID somehow diminish the experience of trans people, but that's not the case. We should have compassion for all people struggling with body dysphoria of any kind, whether it's related to gender, ability, appearance, weight or whatever.
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Post by luvonwheelz on Mar 8, 2014 1:34:58 GMT -5
I'm looking at it from the way that they are treated/attempted to be treated. When a person feels that he or she is transgendered, they go through a full psychological evaluation, and if it is determined that they are in fact transgendered, they begin hormone treatment followed by a plethora of other surgeries in order to transform them into the person that they truly are. With BIID, and I understand that the majority of treatments have come up as not working, the persons treatment can consist of further psychological and experimental drug therapy. The end result isn't amputation or altering their body however they see that it should be. I think I may just look at it a different way, and that's ok. It could also come from the fact that I'm still a relatively new PWD, my two year anniversary isn't until the end of June. It's hard for me to grasp the concept of BIID, I just can't wrap my head around it. It's similar to a problem that is mainly in the gay community, although I'm sure the straight community has it too, where there are men who actually seek out to become HIV positive. Yes there is treatment and no it's not the death sentence it once was, but they see themselves being infected with the virus. Maybe because I'm associating those two together is why I can't see it as positive, but it's another concept that I just don't get. Like I said in a previous post, I have transexuals in my life that are like family, I would take a bullet for them. I have seen what they deal with in society in addition to what the put their body through to achieve what they are truly meant to be. I get that because I love them. Maybe one day I can understand BIID and I will get why the comparisons are made, but today isn't that day; and no, I don't like making separate paragraphs.
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Post by devogirl on Mar 8, 2014 9:27:20 GMT -5
When a person feels that he or she is transgendered, they go through a full psychological evaluation, and if it is determined that they are in fact transgendered, they begin hormone treatment followed by a plethora of other surgeries in order to transform them into the person that they truly are. That's how they are treated NOW but it wasn't that long ago that trans people were told to just conform to their biological gender and doctors would not perform surgery. It may be in the future once BIID is better understood that treatment may be different. Maybe. Anyway you are entitled to your negative opinion of BIID--really, it's ok! It seems like you're saying you love trans people and hate BIID and you don't want those two things lumped together. You don't have to like the concept of BIID, a lot of people don't. But the evidence does suggest that BIID is not wholly psychological, there is some difference in the brain, and psychological treatments don't work.
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stiffl3g
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Post by stiffl3g on Mar 8, 2014 14:29:13 GMT -5
But the evidence does suggest that BIID is not wholly psychological, there is some difference in the brain, and psychological treatments don't work. This is exactly what science says today. You know, for affected people it is not important to teach others about the current state of knowledge. It is not important, what other people think about BIID. It´s simply irrelevant if someone is offended by BIID or how much they know about BIID. Affected people have much support in the scientific community these days and understanding people in forums like this, that´s all what counts. Let us just close useless discussions like this.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 12, 2014 8:17:50 GMT -5
But the evidence does suggest that BIID is not wholly psychological, there is some difference in the brain, and psychological treatments don't work. This is exactly what science says today. You know, for affected people it is not important to teach others about the current state of knowledge. It is not important, what other people think about BIID. It´s simply irrelevant if someone is offended by BIID or how much they know about BIID. Affected people have much support in the scientific community these days and understanding people in forums like this, that´s all what counts. Let us just close useless discussions like this. I know that I'm resurrecting this thread, but I have to chime in, I can't help it. Stiffl3g, I will have to disagree with you, on your statement that people affected with BIID have much support in the scientific community. I work in the medical field, and currently attend school at a level one trauma center. I have seen 5 cases of people with BIID in the past year. In all of those cases, the medical staff was not supportive, and was implying that these people just needed intense psychotherapy, and they'd see that what they were doing, who they desired to be, was wrong. I could not disagree with the medical staff more. For example, I will share one of my most haunting experiences with this common misunderstanding of BIID in the medical community. There was a patient who sat with their legs immersed in a cooler of dry ice for nine hours, playing Halo, until they knew the damage was too severe, and their legs would have to be amputated from the knee down. When the doctors attempted wound care, the patient refused adamantly. The doctors pushed this patient so far, that the patient became severely agitated, and the doctors decided to sedate, and do the wound care anyway, in a useless attempt to save the limbs. In the end, the patient did indeed undergo the bilateral BKA surgery, but not before weeks were spent trying to convince them otherwise, and force their hand. As student, I wasn't really allowed to talk to the patients much, just treat them. I did manage to have a few conversations with this patient throughout their stay, and they were so much happier after the surgery. While I myself do not have BIID (although there was a time when I thought that's why I was so interested in disabilities), and I can not speak on the struggle that some people surely go through, I think that there needs to be more research, there needs to be more understanding. People with BIID that resort to extreme measures shouldn't be made to feel like they are broken, like they are less than anyone else. I really feel that BIID and Devoteeism mirror each other quite a bit sometimes, at least in the sense of guilt/shame/lack of understanding. Not everyone with BIID will find a supportive community, nor will they find support in the scientific community. This is why discussions like this are not useless. In fact, no discussion is truly useless. There is always something to be learned, and discussions give us the opportunity to learn more about who we are, who are peers are, and share our experiences. Please don't think this is in any way an attack on anyone (or their opinion). This is just my opinion, and my experiences. So I'll apologize now if anyone is offended, as that was not my intention.
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