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Post by devogirl on Nov 20, 2015 0:36:00 GMT -5
I disagree 100%. Any time you start off by saying "I'm not sexist/racist/prejudiced, but..." (or in this case, "I'm for equality, but...") you really should just stop right there. Nothing good ever follows. The idea that certain feminists have ruined it for everyone by being "too" something or other (sensational, demanding, loudmouthed, or whatever) is a straw man argument used to discredit feminism. Those straw feminists don't exist. www.harkavagrant.com/index.php?id=341
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Post by lars on Nov 20, 2015 2:18:26 GMT -5
I disagree 100%. Any time you start off by saying "I'm not sexist/racist/prejudiced, but..." (or in this case, "I'm for equality, but...") you really should just stop right there. Nothing good ever follows. The idea that certain feminists have ruined it for everyone by being "too" something or other (sensational, demanding, loudmouthed, or whatever) is a straw man argument used to discredit feminism. Those straw feminists don't exist. www.harkavagrant.com/index.php?id=341Hi! I know I should stay out of this, but oh well. I support equality between sexes, equal pay for the same job, equal opportunities in society etc. I also voted for a female candidate in our presidential elections back then in the year 2000, it was the first time when I voted, but another woman won in the second round. I'm not an expert on these issue by any means, but I suppose I'd qualify as a lame excuse for a feminist.
Your reply made me wonder a bit, so.. Are you saying that the feminist movement/cause is so pure and holy that it's somehow incorruptible? That there's a zero chance of any fringe radicals and extremists existing within the ranks of the righteous? I think it's dangerous when a ( just ) cause becomes so holy and untouchable that it's blasphemy to criticize it. You say those straw feminists don't exist?
Tiina Rosenberg, one of the founding members of the Swedish feminist pressure group turned into political party, Feminist Initiative, is rather infamous in my part of the world for quotes such as "women who have sex with men are traitors to their sex". As an academic who meddles a bit with some politics, she's got quite a bit of media exposure, and I don't think that has done the feminist agenda any good. Rosenberg left FI when FI was in the process of transitioning to be a real political party instead of a pressure group, because she was "too radical" to get along with the rest of the leadership.
These people do exist and it's dangerous to pretend that they don't, even though I don't think these people are hiding in every other bush stalking for poor, innocent men. I don't think the feminist movement is in real danger of being highjacked by some ultras, but it wouldn't be the first time when a cause is highjacked by a small group of angry, loud people.
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Post by devogirl on Nov 20, 2015 6:09:24 GMT -5
I'm not saying anything is pure and incorruptible at all. Certainly we can criticize people, and not everyone who calls him or herself a feminist says things I agree with. But feminism is an ideology, not like a political party with a set platform and appointed or elected leaders. Some feminists saying crazy things should not discredit the entire idea of feminism, which is what the straw man argument implies. We never say "I'm all for representative democracy but (fill in the blank politician) is so crazy that it really discredits the entire idea, maybe it would be better to just have a king." Feminism is not beholden to its most fringe members. We can criticize them without having to apologize for the entire idea of feminism.
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Post by lars on Nov 20, 2015 7:44:17 GMT -5
This I can agree with just fine.
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Post by Tek on Nov 20, 2015 7:50:08 GMT -5
I'm not saying anything is pure and incorruptible at all. Certainly we can criticize people, and not everyone who calls him or herself a feminist says things I agree with. But feminism is an ideology, not like a political party with a set platform and appointed or elected leaders. Some feminists saying crazy things should not discredit the entire idea of feminism, which is what the straw man argument implies. We never say "I'm all for representative democracy but (fill in the blank politician) is so crazy that it really discredits the entire idea, maybe it would be better to just have a king." Feminism is not beholden to its most fringe members. We can criticize them without having to apologize for the entire idea of feminism. I thought I was doing exactly what you said: Criticizing those fringe straw women (and more importantly; how they are causing a very distorted image of feminism) without discrediting feminism itself. That was my intention anyway.
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wheelz1979
Full Member
hello everyone
Posts: 194
Gender: Male
Dev Status: Disabled Male
Relationship Status: Single
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Post by wheelz1979 on Nov 20, 2015 15:30:02 GMT -5
people who have pity parties rub me the wrong way, because no matter how bad your day is there's always someone having a worse day than what you having.
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Post by lucretia on Nov 20, 2015 16:49:58 GMT -5
Anger. Anger/raging is absolutely unattractive.
Arrogance.
Self-pity.
Ignorance.
Smoking.
Poor hygiene.
Lack of ambition.
Black sneakers (Converse excepted).
Lack of education.
Passive-aggressiveness.
The list goes on...
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Nov 20, 2015 18:38:45 GMT -5
people who have pity parties rub me the wrong way, because no matter how bad your day is there's always someone having a worse day than what you having. The University Hospital is about 5 miles from my apartment and it's a pretty big one with a lot of Med-flight helicopters flying over on a regular basis. Every time I see one, I think "There goes someone having a worse day than I'm having."
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Post by FlyingBert on Nov 25, 2015 21:53:58 GMT -5
Girls who doesn't laugh for any stupid thing are out of my interest. Also if she doesn't know about music, even if she's hot -_-
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Post by Hopper on Nov 20, 2016 7:50:18 GMT -5
A quick bump as I've just thought of something.
Something small, but irritating nonetheless.
The people who excuse a perfectly rational quirk or habit of theirs as being ' a little OCD', making light of people who genuinely have it.
It leaves really bad taste in my mouth.
OK, carry on.
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Post by malibu on Nov 21, 2016 6:55:40 GMT -5
Coldness is not hot
But also what you pointed out, Hopper, more generally: all kind of selfdepreciating or selfdestructing behaviour, even if to seem humble or because the person accepts as a destinity, annoys and can make others in the same situation feel less
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Post by matisse on Nov 21, 2016 15:05:28 GMT -5
But feminism is an ideology, not like a political party with a set platform and appointed or elected leaders. Some feminists saying crazy things should not discredit the entire idea of feminism, which is what the straw man argument implies. The problem is that most people don't view it that way. Like it or not, the word "feminism" has come to include and be associated with these "crazy things." I'm not sure that's going to change anytime soon. It's probably better to just use a different word or phrase.
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Post by King Cripple on Nov 22, 2016 15:37:14 GMT -5
At the risk of sounding like a really big prick, I feel like there are a lot of things that bug me about other people. It's probably why I don't have a real connection with anyone.
I like people that have an opinion on things – decisiveness and confidence are incredible sexy on a woman – but I hate people that are opinionated. I know I've said it before, but the world is quickly becoming a very binary experience. Everything is either "the best" or its "the worst" with no middle ground in between. But the world is actually incredibly nuanced. Opinionated people are also often fueled by misinformation and ignorance. I will immediately dismiss the opinion of anyone that cites "some Facebook/BuzzFeed article" while talking to me. You might be really smart, but you sound like a stupid idiot.
I also hate people that have to share a personal story that somehow relates – often by the loosest of narrative threads – to every single topic of conversation. It doesn't matter who you are or what you do. Nobody is that fucking interesting. When you hold a conversation with someone, the topic shouldn't always relate back to you. I feel like a lot of people don't want to listen anymore. They simply want to wait for their turn to talk. And I just don't have much patience for people that can only talk about themselves. The world is an interesting place. Put down your cell phone and pick up a fucking book or newspaper.
And that brings me my next source of the irritation: people that are on their goddamn cell phone all the time. As a person that cannot use a cell phone, nothing is worse than spending time with someone that just cannot seem to pull themselves away from their phone. Snapchat is either the death knell of society or the perfect way with which to view it: pointless videos/images that quickly disappear from both the Internet and our thoughts. But these people really are the worst. Am I right? Yeah, I'm so right.
I feel like cell phones, especially text messaging, have also led to the shockingly rapid decay of the written word, and I'm a big proponent of written communications. I think there is often a certain amount of intimacy and honesty that's unique to committing one's thoughts to paper. While I'm not a total grammar Nazi – I know I still have plenty to learn about properly wielding the English language – it does bug me when people choose not to adhere to the basic rules of grammar. I'm also on a lot of forums and chat with several people online, and conversations these days are often a single, lowercase sentence. Punctuate your shit, people.
Other things that irritate me:
Bad hygiene Politically correctness Passive-aggressiveness Smoking Poor communication skills Lack of confidence
I realize that all of this will make me sound like a picky asshole, but that's only because I am a picky asshole. I'm forced to work closely with all of my caregivers, and those interactions are not immune to personality clashes. And that's life, man. I've grown accustomed to swallowing shit with a grin. But I now view spending time with other people in my free time as optional, and I'd rather enjoy solitude than spend time with people that irritate me. I have plenty of other interests that do not necessitate the involvement of others. I'll do one of those. Or maybe I'll just yell at the neighborhood kids to get the fuck off my lawn.
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Post by Hopper on Nov 22, 2016 15:41:43 GMT -5
From one King to another, I give you a tip of the crown. I agree with you on a lot of stuff there. You may see yourself as picky or a bit of an asshole saying that stuff, but you're right, in my view anyway.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 22, 2016 15:58:08 GMT -5
Im a joker, a smoker, and a midnight toker. But Im at a point where people put me off in general. Give me a joint and my dogs and some music.
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