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Post by BA on Jun 12, 2011 12:52:36 GMT -5
I love a nice neck (no vampire jokes please). I also can get caught up in oggling a sensual mouth.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2011 12:59:53 GMT -5
I think that the male arse is more of an asset amongst your gay friends...for us guys in wheelchairs...women rarely have viewing opportunities Which really is a shame. Don't worry Inigo...those 'arses' come out of the chairs on special occasions for special women
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Post by dentelle on Jun 12, 2011 13:41:32 GMT -5
Which really is a shame. Don't worry Inigo...those 'arses' come out of the chairs for special occasions for special women Yup, I'm sure if you saw all arse all the time, it would get pretty unspectacular. It's better to keep it for special occasions
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2011 13:43:21 GMT -5
my sentiments exactly!
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2011 15:44:00 GMT -5
Mouths make my heart race...gazing into the eyes makes my mind race...
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Post by Valkyrja on Jun 13, 2011 12:47:40 GMT -5
Yes... the neck (some times, with "vampire" meaning... like to nibble! LOL) and the shoulders... strong shoulders are awesome for me too!!!
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Post by Deleted on Jun 13, 2011 17:37:19 GMT -5
how about pinching? I'm pretty good at that...
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Post by Be As You Are on Feb 28, 2012 1:05:04 GMT -5
I was talking to Lucretia and her “ask a dev” stint came up. That's when I truly, finally became aware of... really conscious... of the way that some of the guys regard our admiration? attraction? to what I call, “the stillness.” In spite of my repeated promises to not post anything of depth here any more, I'm going to attempt to describe it and open a discussion about it. I would normally post this in Devs Only... I'm posting it here to allow the guys to comment. There's been a lot of discussion about how it would be nice to have some topics out here to discuss... so here it is. Even knowing some of guys well enough to know how they'll respond, and even though I fear that response (this is some of my deep stuff, folks), I am posting it here anyway. Some of the guys, whether they admit it or not, will hate me for this. I'm okay with it for once... not looking for a guy here any more and feeling kinda f*ckitish. One should seize and embrace the f*ckitish feeling when it arises because it might not last long. Lol I'm not sure I can explain it because, well, just because... Also, this is my opinion and the way I feel. I just realized (about part-way into the paragraph below) that I'm talking as if I'm speaking for all devs and that's not true. Also, in grammatically infuriating manner, I am totally switching back and forth between she and I, so... E, Paige and Lucretia... be prepared. ;D One of the first things I was ever asked about as far as being a dev, was what I liked. That question was in person and out loud and, thanks to stuff that guy had already said, I was feeling about as unsafe psychologically and emotionally as it can get outside of talking to someone that I love. It wasn't really the guy's fault. He'd been talking and it was just that his efforts to put me at ease, discussing this stuff, really didn't. Because he was unconsciously saying lots of things that really indicated that he's not okay with dev-ness. So, I want to throw that out there first. If you have a shot at a dev, if she means anything to you then you have to try to create a safe space for her to discuss this stuff. If you really want to know HER. The reason we have a devs only section is because we, the devs, needed that space. If she can't talk about it... if she feels like she has to hide those things from you then it's going to add a level of secrecy to your relationship that you might not want. It might be alright for you and she... but be aware that the second you jump me over something that I've said about this... the second that you snap out about something that offends you... instead of asking questions and clarifying and coming to an understanding about it... I'm not sharing with you again. You've lost that. And it may be that you don't want it. There was a time here that I remember when a lot of the guys were griping that we devs wanted to keep it all fantasy. Well, when you wander into the real world with it you have to deal with it there. So try to be sure, before you stomp all over me emotionally, that you want to take this real world. Online conversations is where I've been able to talk about this, with guys who've made me feel safe, in conversations with other devs... or maybe it's the distance that online allows that makes it safe enough... but I was finally able to think and answer those questions some. So, back to the topic. To me the stillness is... it's that lack of movement, the limpness of paralyzed limbs. I have no clue why I like it. I've seen it likened to necrophilia here... but that's not it at all. I don't like dead things, they do nothing for me sexually and so I want to do what I can to correct that idea. Paralyzed limbs are so not dead, if they were then the doctors would amputate them. They live... they're just quiet. That leads to other things for the people who live with them (from what I can tell from conversations)... like them sometimes being forgotten. Or they're quietly uncontrollable.... which sometimes makes them despised. I like them for those very things. For their quietness and their lack of control. I like that a man has to put thought into moving his legs. Most of us don't. We totally take movement for granted and mostly don't think about it. But paralysis forces that thought. Even for those who can still walk. I remember Triassic talking about the focus that crutch walking takes. And even those who walk almost unaided have to pay close attention to where they step. It's attractive. I don't know... but I do know it's not because of any deadness. I LIKE the quietness. I wrote a story once about playing with a man's lower half when he was asleep. I asked permission to even write the fantasy. But I love the idea of lavishing affection on those quiet parts. Legs, cock, feet that may provide minimal or even no response but get little actual love anyway. It is a fantasy... but if I ever get an opportunity … with someone who is okay enough with their quiet parts to let me have MY way... I'd like to spend some time with them. Which is not to say that I don't adore the upper, busier parts of a man too. And the fact that they are busier also plays into all of this. The fact that arms and hands are doing the work of the quiet parts. I love watching a quads hands do work differently. I love the parts where sensation is different. Knowing that I don't really know what it feels like and can't. That I need to keep moving to make it still be good for him. That there are places that feel far more than my skin can fathom. It's fascinating and beautiful. I was doing some heavy-duty analysis of my devness in the last couple days and I remembered this specific post that really hit home for me. I went back and searched for it, reread it, and decided it was worth bringing back to the top of the page. Especially for maybe some of the newer members of the board that hadn't seen it. After the crap all over the board in the last couple days, I just loved the openness of this post. Hope you don't mind Inigo....
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Post by lookingfor on Feb 28, 2012 1:52:46 GMT -5
I remember this as being one of the most eye-opening things I had read on the board at that time. I was just getting back into the swing of things and I thought to myself... "Hey, this could really work!" Besides one other post, this one really made me want to get out there and follow my dreams of finding the one. One who understood,the one who just got me.The one that when the time was right; I could be completely open with. I never in a million years thought that I would be completely comfortable sharing this part of my life with an SO. As luck would have it though, a flame was reignited and that flame is still going strong. I have never felt happier or more open with someone than I do now, and I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world.To have someone that embraces this part of me that I have hidden from other lovers for so long, is more than I could have ever hoped for. We lead a normal relationship and have plans for the future. I can honestly say though, that without this board, I may have never had the guts to go for what I really wanted.
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Feb 28, 2012 7:23:14 GMT -5
No, I don't mind, BAYA. I'm honored that my words touched you. Lookingfor, I'm so, so happy for you.
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Post by BA on Feb 28, 2012 9:15:15 GMT -5
I agree that this post was a real turning point for me and I feel it was also a turning point for the board. In light of the negativity we have gone through in the last week or so, I think posts like this as well as WheelieInCali's post represent what this place should really be. The relationship between devs and wheeler's is a complicated one that I admit, I don't fully understand. I didn't always think so and I haven't always been able to say it assuredly, but devs are the best thing to happen to wheeler's since wheelchairs. If you have some time, do a search of my name and dig up my old posts. There have been plenty of girls who didn't like me and people have ridiculed things that I have said. In my opinion, this site doesn't only help the devs. As most of us on this site, devs and wheelers, I have had to face things about myself and the world that I didn't understand and that bothered me more than the average person ever knows. I didn't understand devs and I didn't understand my feelings about them. Finding this site, learning about devs, and getting to know a few has been a wonderful experience for me. If I had let my fear or embarrassment win, and never explored my true feelings about devs, my life would be much emptier. I don't just mean having sex with them, but really getting to know somebody through respectful open conversation. I won't lie, the sex can be mind blowing, but that's not what life is all about. There was a time, not too long ago, that I would have jumped on the "lets get rid of patelville" bandwagon but these days I share Ruth's dream that devotees and the disabled can not only learn to live with and tolerate each other but to embrace each other. Imagine a world where nobody looked down on you because of your disability and nobody judged you because of your sexual preference. If we can't live in that world, can't we pretend? A place to openly lay down our true and honest thoughts, fears and feelings without being afraid of judgement or ridicule. This is the only way a bridge between "devotees" and the disabled will ever be crossed. At this point I accept that there are things that may never be fully accepted or understood on either side but for myself, at this point, I am ready to accept open discussion about those things. I also understand that some of the devs and wheelers are not comfortable to do that and my never be. My hope is that by expressing kindness and empathy here, maybe some of our more closed members will feel more comfort about posting. Regardless of how this place started what is most important to me is what it can become. Inigo, Wheelie and all you others who have put yourself out there, I thank you.
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Post by faith on Feb 28, 2012 10:45:50 GMT -5
Lookingfor... SO happy for you. When a relationship is one that fills you in all the places it is unlike any other. I am 100% in agreement with you. If not for this board I wouldn't be in the place that I am and it is the happiest I have ever been in over 30 years. Thanks Lee and every person who has contributed, challenged our thinking and offered up an encouraging word.
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Post by alluringpariah on Feb 29, 2012 1:48:57 GMT -5
Well, as a quad wheeler I have to say, I enjoyed your post. It's a treat to read something of substance and well written. So much of the Internet is wasted on superficial garbage.
There are times when I consider my body to be dead (sometimes for the purpose of humour) and this gets me down, as it becomes the link in the association between my amorous former life and my not so amorous current exisistence. It was nice that you put a positive spin on paralysed limbs. Better still you backed it all up with logic, and reawakened some personal affection towards my body.
If they were dead, they would be amputated. This makes much sense and highlights how important our legs still are, if only to keep the small flicker of hope for the future burning.
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Post by BA on Feb 29, 2012 19:49:53 GMT -5
Well, as a quad wheeler I have to say, I enjoyed your post. It's a treat to read something of substance and well written. So much of the Internet is wasted on superficial garbage. Means a lot Pariah. Not just to Inigo but to a bunch of us. It's good to have some more substantial talk sometimes.
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Post by Ray T on Mar 1, 2012 2:08:14 GMT -5
There are times when I consider my body to be dead. If they were dead, they would be amputated. This makes much sense and highlights how important our legs still are, if only to keep the small flicker of hope for the future burning. I at times feel that my legs are not only dead but living dead. Vamperic even, sucking the joy and energy out of me and replacing it with pain and longing. Seems the longer I live the more I find myself asking what is the purpose. I do however find it (not suer hot to say this) comforting, reasuring, hopeful, there are people out there that do not see me as "handicapped" but like me, all of me, gimp legs and all. I am glad I have taken the time to really get to know what devotees are about. They give me hope.
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