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Post by vegmama on Jul 29, 2017 13:55:18 GMT -5
So my boyfriend (a wheeler) checks in at a new optometrist office and attempts to give the receptionist his vision insurance info.
Her: "You aren't on disability?! You work?!"
Him: "Nope, I work."
Her: "Good for you! So many are on disability, you know. It's so good that you work!"
Him: "Uh, thanks?"
He then shoots me a smirk while patting himself on the back. I was just sitting there, dumbfounded. I also was avoiding making eye contact with him because I knew I'd burst out laughing.
When we were looking at frames by ourselves, I told him he should've told her what he did for a living and she might have fainted. (He's a lawyer.)
Deep breath. 
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Post by robbb on Jul 29, 2017 18:21:29 GMT -5
Awww! Well done her for holding down a job working with people when she's clearly so ignorant.
R.
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Post by wonk on Jul 29, 2017 19:50:03 GMT -5
Lawyers and accountants are so 1980's PWD!
When I got out of hospital all the do-gooders advised me to take up Wheelchair basketball and to become a lawyer or accountant.
Screw that, I played BB for 6 months while I studied accounting. I hated both!!!
The idea of getting up every day and going to an accounting job made my skin crawl
Unfortunately the 80's was a bit conservative and I couldn't get one of my two dream jobs. Apparently PWD porn stars were not in high demand.
Now I work in a race engine shop as an engineer. I make cool stuff, and make shit go fast.
My sport is Car Racing
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Post by darthoso on Jul 29, 2017 21:46:40 GMT -5
Right? That level of social unawareness and stupidity is pretty flooring. Disagree slightly, "disability" (SSDI to be exact) has become a defacto welfare program in a lot of the country, especially economically depressed areas (coal country, rust belt). One of my aides recently quit to go onto Disability. I think the reaction Veg's bf got was a result of the growing resentment towards those who "abuse" disability. Working PWDs are rare and navigating the system where you can work and have some support is tricky. In a way we're accidentally making it worse by justifying the disability abuse stereotype, which adds fuel to efforts to make the disability system shittier. That's why I want a divorce. SSDI has turned the term "disability" into "can't (or won't) work". Support programs that help us work and live in our communities should be completely separate from simply getting a monthly check. |
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Post by Corey on Jul 29, 2017 23:02:23 GMT -5
One of my aides recently quit to go onto Disability. Darth I agree with your entire post and I was about to post same thing. Im curious though if the part I quoted angers you at all? You work yes? So you dont get SSDI but Im guessing, if you had it, you could use it for disability related expenses. But its going to the nondisabled instead. I am not making a judgement whether the aide deserves or doesnt deserve some type of safety net. But something that was designed to help disabled people is being used for something else, even though some disabled people could use it. |
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Post by vegmama on Jul 30, 2017 0:07:12 GMT -5
Lawyers and accountants are so 1980's PWD! When I got out of hospital all the do-gooders advised me to take up Wheelchair basketball and to become a lawyer or accountant. Screw that, I played BB for 6 months while I studied accounting. I hated both!!! The idea of getting up every day and going to an accounting job made my skin crawl Unfortunately the 80's was a bit conservative and I couldn't get one of my two dream jobs. Apparently PWD porn stars were not in high demand. Now I work in a race engine shop as an engineer. I make cool stuff, and make shit go fast. My sport is Car Racing LMAO...he played wheelchair basketball too! But not in the 80's, both were his idea/choice, and he loved/loves doing both. Your job sounds awesome!  |
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Post by vegmama on Jul 30, 2017 0:35:11 GMT -5
Right? That level of social unawareness and stupidity is pretty flooring. Disagree slightly, "disability" (SSDI to be exact) has become a defacto welfare program in a lot of the country, especially economically depressed areas (coal country, rust belt). One of my aides recently quit to go onto Disability. I think the reaction Veg's bf got was a result of the growing resentment towards those who "abuse" disability. Working PWDs are rare and navigating the system where you can work and have some support is tricky. In a way we're accidentally making it worse by justifying the disability abuse stereotype, which adds fuel to efforts to make the disability system shittier. That's why I want a divorce. SSDI has turned the term "disability" into "can't (or won't) work". Support programs that help us work and live in our communities should be completely separate from simply getting a monthly check. Maybe I should clarify that my bf is Canadian and this happened in Ontario. I do know other Canadian PWD's who are perfectly capable of working but choose to stay on ODSP (Ontario Disability Support Program), just like in the US with SSDI. So yeah, they don't help with the stigma. I guess I was just surprised at her verbalizing the stereotype so blatantly. I honestly don't know how it works in Canada with disability vs. what's covered by their universal healthcare. He doesn't need aides. But I completely agree that care support should be separate from financial support...no matter the country. A PWD that works should still get the medical/community support they need without being docked because their income disqualifies them for Medicaid/Medicare in the US. |
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Post by darthoso on Jul 30, 2017 0:36:56 GMT -5
One of my aides recently quit to go onto Disability. Darth I agree with your entire post and I was about to post same thing. Im curious though if the part I quoted angers you at all? You work yes? So you dont get SSDI but Im guessing, if you had it, you could use it for disability related expenses. But its going to the nondisabled instead. I am not making a judgement whether the aide deserves or doesnt deserve some type of safety net. But something that was designed to help disabled people is being used for something else, even though some disabled people could use it. She wasn't the best so it's overall good that we're parting ways (though replacing her has been a nightmare). Half my income goes to BCBS, the other half supplementing my aides. Her situation doesn't anger me, she's in her 60s, terrible health, divorced, in Section 8 housing with her sister, has a string of DUIs on her record. What frustrates me is I've currently got a choice, my Dad retires as of Monday, making me SSDI DAC eligible. Right now I'm 1619b so I only get Medicaid (and the waiver), but if I reduce my hours to get my pre tax income below the SGA, I can double my income and get Medicare in two years (bye BCBS, especially since they aren't covering Spinraza), plus keep Medicaid under my State's buy in. Downside is I have to turn down every incremental raise for life. Wait too long and I lose DAC by having too many work credits (non DAC SSDI could disqualify you from Medicaid in NC). It's also an open question if the NC Medicaid buy in applies to the waiver or if the waiver has the same asset limit as SSI ($2k). That pisses me off. |
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Post by wonk on Jul 30, 2017 1:42:31 GMT -5
I have an appointment for the NDIS (National Disability Insurance Scheme) in 2 weeks. Previously a lot of people did not work, as you got a $20k pension plus wheelchairs, aides etc. The NDIS means that you can now get all medical supplies even if you are working. Unfortunately I believe it has gone a bit far in what it is giving out. However that is not going to stop me from asking them for a swimming pool  |
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Post by matisse on Jul 30, 2017 2:21:55 GMT -5
Wow. I don't know how I would have reacted. But now that I know this happened, I'm going to be prepared in case it happens to me. I haven't decided what I will say, but I want it to be something that is an implicit insult.
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Post by nordic on Jul 30, 2017 3:15:07 GMT -5
If all pwd that receptionist ever met were on support, she might have the firm belief that this is "how things are". That's very close-minded but to be honest: How much can we really expect from average people living their average life without having friends or relatives with disability to know about disability? (unless they happen to be devs) It's simply not that relevant to them to take the time and think about it.
When you're raising a child, you shouldn't get angry over something the child hasn't learned yet. Obviously. But when you think of it, same principle applies to adults. I studied computer science. If I expected my level of knowledge about IT from every receptionist, I'd have to conclude that they are all complete morons. I usually assume a little educational advice is more helpful to them than just pointing out my superior knowledge for the sake of making them look bad.
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Post by devman1950 on Jul 30, 2017 3:28:14 GMT -5
If all pwd that receptionist ever met were on support, she might have the firm belief that this is "how things are". That's very close-minded but to be honest: How much can we really expect from average people living their average life without having friends or relatives with disability to know about disability? (unless they happen to be devs) It's simply not that relevant to them to take the time and think about it. When you're raising a child, you shouldn't get angry over something the child hasn't learned yet. Obviously. But when you think of it, same principle applies to adults. I studied computer science. If I expected my level of knowledge about IT from every receptionist, I'd have to conclude that they are all complete morons. I usually assume a little educational advice is more helpful to them than just pointing out my superior knowledge for the sake of making them look bad. |
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Post by devman1950 on Jul 30, 2017 3:29:22 GMT -5
Extremely well said nordic I too want to give everyone a chance to be educated before assuming they're a moron  |
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Post by peter37 on Jul 30, 2017 3:45:07 GMT -5
This is an interesting topic which resonates with me,
When I graduated from university I struggled to find any work despite being highly qualified. I was up against a negative perception from employers. Eventually a disabled friend of mine mentioned that there are only three available career jobs open to people with disabilities in the UK. They were: Lawyers, Accountants and Teachers. I because a teacher because one of the best teacher training colleagues within the UK was in my hometown: for mobility reasons it made sense. I have come to really love teaching, but I do dream of being a scientist sometimes.
It may be different now in the UK, but that was my perception in the mid 1990s.
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Post by matisse on Jul 30, 2017 3:57:28 GMT -5
If all pwd that receptionist ever met were on support, she might have the firm belief that this is "how things are". That's very close-minded but to be honest: How much can we really expect from average people living their average life without having friends or relatives with disability to know about disability? You can expect them to not be rude and belittling. Whether or not she firmly believed it, it's beyond impolite to say such a thing. |
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