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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 27, 2011 14:27:54 GMT -5
I've actually done this a couple of times when I was in San Diego. Not all golf courses offer this, but if you call around someone will eventually have it, you'll probably find the most luck with golf courses in bigger cities or more expensive golf courses.
In response to something wheelieincali was talking about. You don't have to get perfectly lined up to hit it, you are actually expected to move the ball into your best hitting position. If you didn't do it like that, it would take forever to park so the ball is in the exactly perfect position.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 27, 2011 0:05:46 GMT -5
I actually own one. It works fine if that is what you're asking. However we don't really use it, but then again my injury doesn't restrict me to just being in one position.
I think this would be a great option for guys that just have to be on their back during sex. I also think if you are going to get it, you should get the bench too. It is a little tricky to transfer onto. However if you're going to use it, you are going to have someone there to help you transfer if you need it.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 26, 2011 23:55:31 GMT -5
Another topic:
I'm just curious how many devotees have picked their place to live because it was also wheelchair accessible. I'm not talking about having a roll in shower or anything crazy, but having no steps, or at the most one step in/out of where you live. Having wide enough doorways to go through and be able to enter the bathroom. Just simple stuff like that. I'm guessing some of the more experienced devs that have been with a disabled man might have taken this into account, but maybe I'm wrong. Anyways....I'm curious to hear the results to this.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 19, 2011 13:09:49 GMT -5
Actually the easiest way is to be disabled yourself (then become proficient in a sport and meet the right people and then have patience and they'll come to you). I know that isn't logical for you, but I got a call this morning about coming down and helping coach/play with a recently injured 17 yr old para that was a basketball player and is really enjoying wheelchair basketball. Even with the 20 yr old basketball chairs they have him in.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 12, 2011 23:07:08 GMT -5
Marine, I think you are comparing yourself with the other guys in the board Actually if you go back and look, in the 3rd and 6th paragraph, I do say, (in not so many words) that my condition is not the same as others, and that this is my own experience.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 12, 2011 19:59:14 GMT -5
I suspect you're right after a low para in the hierarchy, and low paras seem to have pretty decent dating lives if they leading active lives. But I am surprised that you don't think it slowed you down. The only time it was slowed down was right after my injury and before I had gained back my confidence. Which is about a year long period. After that, it was much easier than I anticipated. I was actually dating more than when I had legs. I was still dating the same variety of women. I'm positive that my disability scared off some, but if I had the chance to carry on a conversation with them, then I usually won them over. In most cases I was still the one calling it off, (not to be a dick, but just like anyone else who realizes this isn't the person I want to be with the rest of my life). Some girls were heart broken and made comments that they were falling in love with me. So not all, if any were "Just wanting to give me a spin." I think non-devs found me easier to date than other wheelers. I don't have any other medical issues going on other than missing my legs, and having phantom pain now and then. Every date always asked "is everything still functional down there?" Which they were always pleasantly surprised to hear everything was in working order. I feel like all the girls that I dated looked at me like a regular guy if not an above average guy that was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. But I still did things most normal guys did, I would still hold the door open for the ladies, I even cooked them dinner at my apartment on first dates. I tried to show them the only difference was that I was just shorter and did things slightly differently. I just had the attitude that not every girl liked me in the first place, so why should things be any differently now. I certainly don't like every girl I come across, so I'm not going to pout about it. That is just my story and I don't expect that to be the same for everyone else. I was injured with a handful of other guys that 5 out of 7 all received the same injury as me, and not all of them got with girls before their injury and I wouldn't expect them to be with girls that much afterwards either. I remember hearing from other amputees that they were actually hooking up with girls a lot more because of their amputation than before. I'm not sure if it made for a good ice breaker or what.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 12, 2011 1:13:41 GMT -5
I think I have that same green shirt I thought the group would enjoy this. I was looking to see what green shirt Ruth was wearing, and then when I looked at the picture and all you can see is part of the collar I had to ask my wife if she was serious. Sure enough she was serious and even brought out the green shirt that she thought was the same, and I have to totally disagree and I'm still shaking my head about this whole thing.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 12, 2011 0:51:26 GMT -5
Fine, I stand corrected then. I think there is some truth to what you said, but I just don't think it is so widespread, that only devs find people with disabilities attractive. It's just that the disability is not what they are attracted to. Or at least not attracted to the same way a dev would be.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 12, 2011 0:39:32 GMT -5
And it makes me feel stupid sometimes. But (some of) you guys say, and I believe you, that other women aren't attracted to you and I just can't seem to wrap my head around it. I can't understand. And sometimes I feel like it's stupid that I can't wrap my head around what the rest of society apparently accepts as normal. I mean, a hot guy is a hot guy however he gets around. I have to disagree to a certain extent on this topic. I wasn't injured too long before I got into the dating scene, and I had no idea about the whole dev world at this point either. The first girl I was with (post injury) was just a girl I met in San Diego who was another patient at Balboa Naval Medical Center. We had seen each other around a couple of times, and somehow a small conversation was started in the PX (small convenient type store). I can't say that I did anything special to impress her except be myself. At this point I didn't have the confidence to make any type of first move, luckily she did and I like to credit her with pulling me out of my shell in regards to being with women again. From there I had an account on Match.com I didn't hide my disability, in fact I had a picture showing it perfectly clear, and had something in my intro even going into more detail that I was an amputee. I actually had quite a bit of success on that site, as far as getting dates. I do think, and I'm pretty confident that one of the girls I met on that site was a devotee. All the others, really had no interest in my amputations as sexual, but that didn't stop them from finding me attractive. Maybe my disability is looked at differently, than paras, quads, CP, and others, and maybe there is something about me being wounded in combat that is different, but I really don't think my disability slowed down my sex life and ability to get a date. Now, not to totally contradict what I said. But there aren't many disabilities out there that I would have been willing to date when I still had my legs. However there are some that I don't think would have scared me off. This whole conversation reminds me of a paralympic sports camp I attended a while back. We had a tennis instructor that was a female para in her late 30's. She was very attractive, and she was constantly being hit on by a lot the guys participating in the camp. Eventually a "guy conversation" came up about whether or not they would "bone" the tennis instructor. The consensus was about 50-50. Some said they didn't care, she was still hot, wheelchair or not, some said "it would just be wrong" and couldn't explain why. Now I know this wasn't a conversation about whether they would date her, but for a guy, and especially these guys, it is practically the same thing. The one part I do agree with you on, is when you say "a hot guy is a hot guy" just the same as a hot girl is a hot girl. But non-devs aren't looking at the same features, obviously. Some might be scared off by the chair, but if the guy or girl is hot enough, and has a lot going on for them, then I don't think it is as big of an issue as some might assume it would be.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 8, 2011 14:57:53 GMT -5
Skiing was actually the first sport they had me doing. I avoided playing any sport that required a wheelchair. I had it in my mind I was going to be walking on prosthetics for everything. After being exposed to skiing, I quickly was trying any sport that became available.
I'm curious as to how they introduced you to basketball. Was it just you out there in a chair by yourself or did they have a game going on? I've seen good and bad ways adaptive sports have been introduced, and you typically don't know it is a bad way until you've seen it done the good way.
I went to a military sports camp that wasn't set up very well. It quickly took you through as many sports as possible without really being given a chance to really grasp the way the sport is played. One of the funnest but most poorly ran sports there was sitting volleyball. I had some experience with the sport, so I knew right away that a 50 minute demo with not enough people was going to suck. This camp was used as a practice session to get ready for something called the Warrior Games.
During the Warrior Games, a lot of the guys at this camp didn't bother signing up to be on the volleyball team because of the experience. However once the games started and they were there to support us, they saw how the game was supposed to be played and they were out there playing with us during our warm-up session, wishing they could be competing in a real life game situation.
That is crazy that she just went and bought you a racing chair. I hope it wasn't new, because those things are pretty pricey. I tried that sport, since I was a collegiate track athlete I figured it would be right up my ally. Wrong, two totally different sports and even though I tried to tough it out to see if it would grow on me, it just never happened.
I think sports are a great thing, you just got to find the one that gels for you.
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Lonely!
Jan 8, 2011 14:12:37 GMT -5
Post by MarineAmp on Jan 8, 2011 14:12:37 GMT -5
I'm sure at least some of you knew this, but they do have hand control manual transmission systems. It is kind of hard to find anyone who installs this in the U.S. but I know there is one in the San Diego area (or at least southern Cal area) that does this.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 7, 2011 12:38:43 GMT -5
;D about the sports... I'm not AGAINST sports, but haven't been into teams or sports since High School. HOWEVER... I'm finding more and more that sports are where the guys are... so... It's funny, I never liked sports, I've never been able to care about it at all. Until I discovered wc basketball. I found that it was thrilling, exciting and fun to watch and I could really get into it. It's not even about crushing on the guys, I don't know what it is. But I finally understand how some girls do enjoy watching sports! Thank you Ruth I can honestly admit it has been a little frustrating hearing some opinions about sports or athletes. Not so much the lack of interest in a sport, because I don't like all sports either. Comments that lead you to believe the only good quality about an athlete is a tone body. I get this impression that you got your impression of jocks from watching the movie Revenge of the Nerds. There are athletes in the NFL who graduated from Harvard, last I checked Stanford was not only a great university academically, but they have, and had some pretty good athletes come from there as well. John Elway and Tiger Woods are probably the only names most will recognize. I am really happy I have a wife who enjoy participating in sports with me. In fact I'm really proud that my wife is out there playing wheelchair basketball with me. It's too bad that this sport and a lot of other adaptive sports seemed to be restricted solely to those with disabilities. Where I live, I have to bring in AB people to have enough for a game, and it is very rare for anyone (athlete or not) to come and play and not have a good time. I have gotten some of my friends addicted to the game. There is also a wide range of sports, that take all different types of personalities to participate in. If you don't like the "quad rugby type" (whatever that is) there is the surfer, endurance athletes, skiers. I have a "para friend" on myspace that befriended me because I had adaptive sport action photo of me as my profile pic. I think the girls in here would probably drool over him. He's a sufer/skateboard park wheeler/stud of a guy who also helps run a really successful nationwide adaptive sports program for children. It's too bad, because some of you don't like sports, so I guess it probably wouldn't be worth taking a shot. I don't know of too many events where wheelers are going to gather other than sporting events, maybe some kind of convention for wheelchairs/prosthetics, or just fitting in a specific disabled category. All of these things are going to take work to find out. In some cases it may require some serious detective work. If nothing is coming up online, I'd find the number to places like the local parks and rec, rehab hospitals or a major hospital and ask to speak with a sports therapist. I'd call universities or colleges in the area. The smaller the city, the less likely there will even be anything there. I live in a pretty decent size city, the whole valley's population is about half a million people, and there is very few adaptive sports stuff here. Cities with populations in the millions is where you are going to have the most success if any success.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 6, 2011 22:56:07 GMT -5
I don't know if Canada is really slow, but it is almost done being shown in theaters here, and is just showing in a few theaters where I live. But it has been out for about a month.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 6, 2011 15:10:52 GMT -5
Going to sporting events seems like a perfect and great way to meet people to me. When I was dating a quad, I used to go to his wheelchair basketball games and it was great fun. The trouble is, I can't find them here! I find websites for teams, but then they have no schedule up, the only information on matches is from stuff they did months ago. It's really frustrating. I'm a flirty, friendly, outgoing person. If I could just find the people, I can handle the flirting! I agree finding specific details about that on the internet is sometimes impossible. You're dealing with a small community that don't always play in a gym where there might not even be very much seating for spectators in the first place. Luckily a lot of these websites have some kind of contact information. You might have to actually contact them, asking for a schedule and any other information you'd need. It's what I like to call detective work the old fashioned way.
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Post by MarineAmp on Jan 6, 2011 15:00:10 GMT -5
I just googled maryland and wheelchair basketball and found that you guys have a "pro team" there. I put that in quotes because there is a good chance they are paying to be on the team. Some colleges have it as either a club sport or an actual scholarship sport.
I know of two military hospitals that they play basketball at, bethesda and walter reed. That would take some effort to be able to figure out when and how you would be able to attend.
Another cool thing I'd kinda like to see sometime in the future is the National Wheelchair Basketball Championships. This year Denver is hosting it April. It lasts about 3 days I think.
Hope that helps
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