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Post by shynightgirl on Mar 8, 2011 22:03:16 GMT -5
I should have said that in the future I will respect the wishes of anyone who doesn't wish to be included futher in a post. Maybe a bit more tact in asking to be left out. In return I request that it not be decided for me that because someone has said what they had to say, that I have said all I have to say. Considering most of my post had little to do with anyone other than myself and my "taken" one, whose thread we are posting in now. I don't think I attacked anyone here or even done anything that hasn't been done hundreds of times on here before. As a loyal silent reader (lurker) here since 2006, I have seen threads hijacked, as well as others using people's public info and comments to convey or compare their thoughts and feelings to. I apologize for ruffling feathers and will probably return to silent mode and read in the safety of not offending anyone again. I had moved on to the topic of jealousy in relationships and was anxious to hear other opinions. @ruth: i'm a huge fan! @ Z28: You go girl!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 8, 2011 22:17:38 GMT -5
I apologize for ruffling feathers and will probably return to silent mode and read in the safety of not offending anyone again. +1
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tuna
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Post by tuna on Mar 9, 2011 8:02:00 GMT -5
@ Nightstar: Thanks @ Shynightgirl: Youu are most welcome to talk TO me but not ABOUT me. Your post did not address me directly but made statements about my possibilities etc etc. I dont appreciate that. If you have something to say to me you always can but please address that directly instead of bringing me up in a conversation and making conjectures about me. Whatever my age might be, that has nothing to do with my possibility of finding love; You could have made a general comment about young girls and their possibility of finding love but NOT a personal comment about a particular person and their age related possibility options. THAT is what I am objecting to. Besides your whole point about an older woman holding on to their love (out of desperation it would see) vis. a vis. a young one who apprently has more oppertunities is a very very debatable point. you can go ahead and say what you like but please have the decency to make it general instead of putting a name to it making it personal. Your posts may be all about you and your "taken" one as you claim, but my age and my possibility of finding love is none of your or your "taken" one's business I believe. If you had addressed your opinions directly to me, or even made a general point (however mistaken and prejudiced) about young girls' ability to hold on to their loves, I wouldnt mind. But putting my name in there, making me a case in point is plain annoying. I dont like unpleasantness and I think I was quite civil to you when you addressed me directly, but this post that was 'discussing' me and making me an example, was out of line. I do not appreciate that. And I have no qualms making that point clear. This is going to be my last post about this whole fiasco, because I think this is very counterproductive and lends a bad air to the otherwise friendly environment here. So I am just going to stop here. I hope you will respect my wish to be left out of ebing exemplified in your conjectures. If this makes you goo back to 'lurking'; well that is frankly your choice. I am only making mine clear.
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Post by wheelieInCali on Mar 9, 2011 8:19:47 GMT -5
This place can be very unfriendly at times. There is a very interesting dynamic of people here. The issues run deep and friction is bound to occur.
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Post by ruthmadison on Mar 9, 2011 9:48:11 GMT -5
@ Nightstar: Thanks @ Shynightgirl: Youu are most welcome to talk TO me but not ABOUT me. Your post did not address me directly but made statements about my possibilities etc etc. I dont appreciate that. If you have something to say to me you always can but please address that directly instead of bringing me up in a conversation and making conjectures about me. Whatever my age might be, that has nothing to do with my possibility of finding love; You could have made a general comment about young girls and their possibility of finding love but NOT a personal comment about a particular person and their age related possibility options. THAT is what I am objecting to. Besides your whole point about an older woman holding on to their love (out of desperation it would see) vis. a vis. a young one who apprently has more oppertunities is a very very debatable point. you can go ahead and say what you like but please have the decency to make it general instead of putting a name to it making it personal. Your posts may be all about you and your "taken" one as you claim, but my age and my possibility of finding love is none of your or your "taken" one's business I believe. If you had addressed your opinions directly to me, or even made a general point (however mistaken and prejudiced) about young girls' ability to hold on to their loves, I wouldnt mind. But putting my name in there, making me a case in point is plain annoying. I dont like unpleasantness and I think I was quite civil to you when you addressed me directly, but this post that was 'discussing' me and making me an example, was out of line. I do not appreciate that. And I have no qualms making that point clear. This is going to be my last post about this whole fiasco, because I think this is very counterproductive and lends a bad air to the otherwise friendly environment here. So I am just going to stop here. I hope you will respect my wish to be left out of ebing exemplified in your conjectures. If this makes you goo back to 'lurking'; well that is frankly your choice. I am only making mine clear. I do agree the age comment was odd. If it were easy for young women to find love, no one would end up older and still alone. We would all find love when we are 24 and that would be that.
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Post by shynightgirl on Mar 9, 2011 14:43:59 GMT -5
@ruth I think I should have worded that idea differently. What I mean by the age comment, is given the fact that we are talking about a smaller pool of "prospects" than the general population of women, our chances of finding the perfect man for us is lowered to begin with. Taking that into consideration, when I were 23 for instance, I still had all the hopein the world that I would find my soulmate before I was nearly 40. As my age went up, my hopes dwindled, as I went through relationships that proved to be disappointing at best. So, reaching my late 30's before I finally meet the man who encompasses everything I have looked for in someone, I can look back and see that had I known at 23 what would be my future, I would have been more able at that age to understand the thought process of a woman in her late thirties being "guarded" against losing what she has waited so long to find. Does this make more sense? The fact that @ 23 you still have that hope, the possibility of finding what you want in a man.
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Post by ruthmadison on Mar 10, 2011 0:37:04 GMT -5
@ruth I think I should have worded that idea differently. What I mean by the age comment, is given the fact that we are talking about a smaller pool of "prospects" than the general population of women, our chances of finding the perfect man for us is lowered to begin with. Taking that into consideration, when I were 23 for instance, I still had all the hopein the world that I would find my soulmate before I was nearly 40. As my age went up, my hopes dwindled, as I went through relationships that proved to be disappointing at best. So, reaching my late 30's before I finally meet the man who encompasses everything I have looked for in someone, I can look back and see that had I known at 23 what would be my future, I would have been more able at that age to understand the thought process of a woman in her late thirties being "guarded" against losing what she has waited so long to find. Does this make more sense? The fact that @ 23 you still have that hope, the possibility of finding what you want in a man. Okay, I can see that. Even though I'm nearing 30, I am still in that phase of delusional hope that my future won't be as empty as it is likely to be!
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tuna
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Post by tuna on Mar 10, 2011 7:46:15 GMT -5
@ Wheelie: hey this "Totally Taken" thingie is a total riot! why dont the taken ones have a picture with the partner as their avataar for a while? @ Ruth: I dont really think age has all that much to do with the possibility of finding love; as in, it just happens right? Some people find it when theyy are very young like a childhood sweetheart or something and grow up to marry them; others find them probabbly later in life and so on. that age could be 20s or 30s or even 70s for that matter. It just happens I guess, things fall into place. Besides, maturity levels vary. There IS something called a mental/emotional age. And when people find something they can hold on to, and if they are stable enough in themselves, no matter what their age be, they will be capable of holding on to that. Besides, to hold on to something should mean more than just a my-bio-clock-is-ticking-oh-my-god kind of desperation. Of course, I am exaggerating but thats only to make a point. though, that kind of thing also happens and pretty frequently. and its not necessarily a bad thing, everyone has their reasons. remember Charlotte Lucas from Pride and Prejudice?
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Post by Inigo Montoya on Mar 10, 2011 8:10:17 GMT -5
As a woman who's about the same age as SNG and still very single. I'm really, really, really glad that I live in a time (and place?) when... it might not be as comfortable... but a woman can just about "have it all*" without a mate. A career, home and even a family, if she's so inclined.
The mate, of course, would then be excluded in "it all."
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tuna
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Post by tuna on Mar 10, 2011 10:50:15 GMT -5
@inigo: Thank the Lord someone finally said this Yoo Hoo!
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Post by Emma on Mar 10, 2011 20:41:23 GMT -5
So how did you all make the red text on your avatar? I don't have photoshop and have no idea where to begin :/
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Post by wheelieInCali on Mar 10, 2011 20:45:04 GMT -5
I used irfanview but you can do it in microsoft's Paint program located in accessories in your programs list
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Post by ~Z28gal~ on Mar 10, 2011 22:07:45 GMT -5
Besides, to hold on to something should mean more than just a my-bio-clock-is-ticking-oh-my-god kind of desperation. Of course, I am exaggerating but thats only to make a point. though, that kind of thing also happens and pretty frequently. and its not necessarily a bad thing, everyone has their reasons. remember Charlotte Lucas from Pride and Prejudice? I hope to god we can all find someone that we don't have to encourage to garden extensively to maintain our sanity!
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Post by alluringpariah on Mar 11, 2011 3:07:14 GMT -5
Having never seen any rendition of Pride & Prejudice, are you talking in euphemisms?
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tuna
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Post by tuna on Mar 11, 2011 5:32:44 GMT -5
~Z28gal~: haha, I know! also, hopefully not have 'relations' like lady catherine. besides it would be worse for us, because in all likelyhood we would end up living in a tiny apartment with mr. collins! no gardens or study rooms to offer any respite! alluringpariah: I have no idea what you mean. are you saying you havent seen any rendition of P and P? or that I haven't? besides, probabbly 'read' is a more fitting verb than 'seen' in this case
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